I haven't really been online outside of work for the last few days, due to some 'real life' issues going on that have taken up most of my time.
My ex Father in law is in hospital at the moment and worryingly ill after a fall breaking his femur head on the weekend. He's been operated on and 'repaired' but the worry is especially compounded because he is already very frail after a severe stroke some years ago.
Quick history of my relationship with this amazing man:
We met each other for the first time when he was chairperson in a series of board interviews I went through, during the selection process for a position in the civil service. He was a senior civil servant with hundreds of staff below him and myself being found just above the bottom of the chain.
Shortly after starting my new role I met his daughter in a bar (one of the most amazing coincidences of my life), we dated, married, gained the beauty and responsibility of parenthood, divorced, then became best friends working together as a 'family team in different locations'.
The relationship with his daughter didn't initially help our career harmony though for two reasons. He wasn't happy with her seeing a lowly admin officer (who came from 'the wrong side of the tracks') and he wasn't happy because the particular lowly admin officer was involved with his daughter in the early 90's UK rave scene, turning up to work pretty rough at times. It worked against him as well, as I remember a time he was shouting at me in his office (with the blinds closed) that he couldn't even sack me because of the personal complications with me seeing his daughter.
Lots of emotive experiences and history, but far too much I could type here, although you get the picture.
Anyway, only months after he retired (with a very agreeable lump-sum & pension), he suffered a massive stroke resulting in a wheelchair. This man has never smoked, never done drugs, hardly ever drunk alcohol, in fact I've seen him 'tipsy' maybe 3 times in over a decade and a half. He's lived a very charitable life helping others and with strong values of fairness to all, yet after just months of stopping his public service he was denied the chance to ever truly enjoy anything again.
This to me was in the top ten of cruel and unjust acts that 'life' could carry out. If there were a god who was all powerful before me I would use many words that some could argue showed a lack of vocabulary, but in my mind the words would be the most appropriate.
Even though he's my 'ex' father in law, he'll always share some DNA with my son and he'll always be 'Grandad' who I love. I will always be there for him for that reason and the fact that he is a man I respect as a good person who has influenced my life in many good ways.
All my thoughts and love are going his way at this time, but I continue to wonder, how is it that the kindest and most goodly folk seem to get dealt the lousiest hands of cards in life sometimes?
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