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She wants me to move :S

So I have been seeing my girlfriend now for a few months. BARE IN MIND WE HAVE KNOWN EACHOTHER FOR TEN YEARS. She lives 2 hours away from where I currently live. She is nurse up there and I work IT at SGS Canada. My contract is coming up soon and there is some talk about renewing but not 100% yet.

Well she feels it has come to a point now where we need to see more of each other. She wants me to move up. She sends me possible job opportunities in her area in my field. I have applied to them, mainly because my contract is coming up haha.

I have lived in Peterborough now for 8 years, I am almost 27, is it time to pick up move and take a chance with this lady?

14 blog comments below

Only you know the answer to that one fella.
I always ask myself do I really want to do something and does it harm anyone else. The rest doesn't matter much else to me because if something fails I'll just rebuild my little house of cards and start again, without having to wonder "what if..."

Good luck and I always say chase your adventures in life while you can, unfortunately the day comes to all of us when we can't Wink
watersoul on Wed May 01, 2013 9:41 pm
watersoul wrote:
Only you know the answer to that one fella.

Again, Watersoul is right Wink Only you can answer that question. Only you can run that cost/benefit analysis and understand how serious you are about the entire situation.
If you can find work there, you have to ask yourself what would hold you back… if it's just fear of change, well, change is going to happen no matter where you are. If it's fear of the relationship, you'll have to discuss it with your partner and figure things out… or just figure out what you're actually looking for.

Work wise, it doesn't sound like you'd be sacrificing any stability by leaving.
Ankhanu on Wed May 01, 2013 9:54 pm
How long is the distance from your current office to your girlfriend's house?
I know some people commute everyday.
One of them commutes 150KM over 20 years.
After all, a good job is not easy to find.
rx9876 on Thu May 02, 2013 8:25 am
Your decision just might be made for you. Just wait and see if your contract is renewed. If it is - stay put. If it is not, consider your options then and only then. Keep us posted.
TVme on Wed May 08, 2013 2:44 am
The decision is yours and yours alone to make. However, I would think about whether you would regret either option later on in life. Perhaps it is time to take a chance... perhaps you will need to find a new job anyway... perhaps this is your chance at delving deeper into a relationship with the one meant for you...perhaps not. It is a decision you need to make and I wish you all the best with making it. Good luck and may the powers that be be with you whatever you decide.
pauline123 on Wed May 08, 2013 6:56 pm
I'd personally be scared to death to move in a situation like that, as the expectations on her side could easily become unrealistic relative to me not feeling completely sure about what I wanted. I'd be honest with her though, and tell her that.

On the job front, I'd go for the best job available regardless of where it is located. I'd imagine it should be easy for her to relocate as well as nurses are in great demand every where in Canada.

Having said this, you may want to check up if this is what she really wants you to do. Maybe she is just testing your commitment to the relationship and letting you know the long-distance relationship is not working for her any longer. If you can't move closer, then it's maybe time for both of you to move on.
deanhills on Thu May 09, 2013 4:30 am
Sound advice from everyone. Dean caught my eye with this comment there and gave me a different view. I understand the concern however I do not feel that is the way for her. She has said if I can not find work around her way she will start looking around my way. She does not want to lose her 5 year tenure at her current hospital.

I have recently been contacted by a programming company in her area and they have given me a test to do. I will do this test and see where this goes. I mean if I do move up and land a decent job it might work out well even if me and her do not last? I am done with my current home town and I do like the town she lives in. Well lets see how it goes.
TheLimey on Thu May 09, 2013 1:56 pm
Good luck on his endeavor!! May it work out one way or another in a positive manner.
pauline123 on Thu May 09, 2013 3:59 pm
TheLimey wrote:
I mean if I do move up and land a decent job it might work out well even if me and her do not last? I am done with my current home town and I do like the town she lives in. Well lets see how it goes.
Now that sounds determined and positive. Best of luck with the test. Cool
deanhills on Thu May 09, 2013 4:13 pm
Test is pretty hard. I am no good at Java stuff.
TheLimey on Mon May 13, 2013 9:43 pm
The resource of JAVA is very easy to obtain through the Internet.
If the test can be done with a computer and the API or the internet,
that will not be too hard to finish that.
If you have enough time,
tweak the performance or resource management before delivering the result.
It might help.
rx9876 on Tue May 14, 2013 4:26 am
Thank you rx! Some of this stuff does seem a bit tricky to find still. He gave me the test but I can use any reference.
TheLimey on Tue May 14, 2013 2:12 pm
Didn't happen... phew, nearly made a big mistake there.
TheLimey on Mon Jul 08, 2013 3:16 pm
What didn't happen?
How's everything?
rx9876 on Tue Jul 09, 2013 3:09 am

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