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One Night Stand





cvkien
I had girl friend. but i had a good friend (for me, friends categorize in 3 group, friend, good friend and best friend). and that good friend want to have one night stand with me. long time i already knew she likes me. so if you, what will you do? i still love my girl friend of cause.
Elric
cvkien wrote:
I had girl friend. but i had a good friend (for me, friends categorize in 3 group, friend, good friend and best friend). and that good friend want to have one night stand with me. long time i already knew she likes me. so if you, what will you do? i still love my girl friend of cause.


If you "love" your girlfriend and are still seeing her, you probably have either an explicit or implicit commitment of fidelity to her (i.e. I'm assuming you don't practice some kind of alternative lifestyle). In which case, if you're to be even slightly honorable you either tell her what you intend to do, don't do it, or formally break off your commitment to her before doing it. Any other course of action would make you an ass, IMHO.
ddoonie
I agree with Elric, your post does not even warrant a response as it is very contradictory. you state you love her, yet you would entertain the idea of a one night stand...
Bluedoll
I am not really sure about this question. If you have two friends how can one be only a one night stand before you even consider a new relationship? That sounds to me like you are thinking of doing something that is not sincere right from the beginning.

That would not be good for anyone including you. Obviously you like both, so not to sound insincere myself I should caution when I say making love is how we find out? The risk is, someone can be seriously hurt and do you care about that?

This gets more and more complicated as we get more seriously envolved in relationships so you might want to consider what your values and standards are and go with them. Your heart will always override your impulses and is your best companion.

I hope this really helped and didn't confuse things more. It is just not a simple yes or no kind of question.
ainieas
I don't think any of these post will make any difference as to what you'll do in the end. So the best thing would be for you to look into it all and decide if the oen night stand will actually be worth it. If you love someone would put them thru the experience of having to live with your infidelity? Also if you have a one night stand will you be able to overlook the guilt?
cavey
If you still are in a relationship with your girlfriend (you wrote "had", so I'm a bit confused), you should break it up before you have a one night stand, unless you have an open relationship. If you are not planning on breaking up. Remember, this one night stand can ruin your relationship. Is this one night worth ruining a relationship that could last for years? A lifetime? If you love someone, you should not even consider having sex with other girls, in my opinion!
Coen
If you still have a girlfriend then I wouldn't even think about doing it. That other friend of yours only wants a one night stand, meaning you'll throw away your relation for one night of "fun". I take it you wouldn't cross your girlfriend because you expect the same from her. So just don't.
ssthanapati
it seems this guy's mind and d**k are pointing to two different directions.... Just do what u think is right.... I would have listened to my mind
justtj
i would say go for one night stand..
and make sure its only for one night, don't let your girl know about it..
and ya, its not cheating Smile
cvkien
this is all your opinion. for me, i reject her. and i tell her i'm going to engage with my girlfriend. so this solve everything. one night stand is dangerous. either she use sex to trap you or she will bugging you after one night stand. sometimes girls are unpredictable. they can do something really scared. so if you really want to have sex, save it for your loves one.
Da Rossa
Quote:
i would say go for one night stand..
and make sure its only for one night, don't let your girl know about it..
and ya, its not cheating Smile
How isn't that cheating? Hope you were ironic.

If both participants are consenting, single adults, then the ONS has no problem at all, imho.
apple
hmmm....contrary to what most people will say and believe. I am not of the opinion that sex and love always go together.

If you "love" her...then to me that means you will chose to do what is 'right' and 'acceptable' by her. You will chose not to hurt her or put her in harms way...

If you say you love her and you wanna bed another girl, than maybe you care about her and not "love" her.

Maybe you want the other girl cause you are not physically pleased in your current relationship.

My advice is this...weigh the consequences....if you do and the other girl gets pregnant or you get some kinda disease...what will happen? if your girl finds out, what will happen?

Having weighed your options do what is more important, do what will make you pleased and keep you fulfilled in the long term.
talk2me
First of all, one-night-stand mean two people doesn't know each other. after having a wonderful night together, they will never see each other again, and no phone call.

In your case, she want to have sex with you or friend with benefit.
enricos
The way i look at it there is two situations

situation 1 : you have a one night stand , and your gf never finds out. Things are good

situation 2 : your gf finds out about it and she leaves you. Do you love her enough to not lose her ?


If you love her enough to never lose her , then don't take the chance . But if your not really serious about it then , hell , what do you have to lose .
RosenCruz
keep your girlfriend and dont miss out that one night stand....! Wink
thealpha
i have one girl friend in hong kong, i think that one night stand will hurt my girl friend in a large extent.
Different countries will have different perspectivas and viewpoint about this situation as they will have different norms and moral value that to be upholded.
amperx
stick with your girl friend, but dont miss out the one night stand, you could lose your good friend Very Happy
jenss
Just dump your girlfriend. She'll be better off in the long run. The fact that you are considering having a one night stand says you don't love her enough for her to be someone you'll want to marry. Might as well break it off now before you get into it any deeper. Be the man and let her go her own way.
winmark
Ya dump her and don't get into any relation when you are not capable of. I hate such stuff when people get into some relationship blindly and latter dump the partner saying we are not compatible or we can't get along.
Raydon
Personally I would tell me gfriend, and explain it all how it happend. if your gfriend is the ONE, than I'm sure she will forgive you...and try to understand you and help you and your relationship go thru this.

If not...then... go look for some1 else... Rolling Eyes
BlackroseDigitalDesigns
This response may be a bit contradictory to what you have heard, but this is from my POV.

For me sex is a purely physical thing. A beautiful, fun, and exciting form of pleasure similar to skydiving or bungee jumping. Its not something that should be hoarded away and denied to oneself. To me there is a huge difference between sex and love. A night of just sex without emotional ties is a great thing and should be enjoyed as much as possible.

I always express my beliefs at the beginning of any relationship to avoid the heartache and broken glass later on. If she cant cope with my beliefs then we cant have a relationship.

I also learned early that honesty is the most important part of a relationship, so just doing it and not telling her is not an option in my book. They always find out, you will slip up sometime and then destroy something beautiful.

So I guess my advice to you is to check yourself and where you stand on the issue. If your beliefs are strong enough on the issue, bring up the topic with the one you "love" and discuss it openly and honestly. No hidden meanings or veiled assumptions.

Oh and before I get flamed for this, I want to let you know that I have been in functioning relationship for two years with this a basis. I am happy and madly in love with her, mainly because she understands my views.
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