gonzo
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The day after Hurricane Katrina smashed into eastern Louisiana and western Mississippi, leaving a swath of devastation comparable to some of the worst in history, a multi-national coalition formed for the express purpose of discouraging countries from providing any relief aid to the beleaguered inhabitants of the Gulf Coast.
The so-called "Coalition of the Gloating" includes representatives from France, Germany, Iran, Syria, North Korea, Indonesia, Sudan, Mexico, and other respected members of the global community. The coalition's manifesto boasts some of the world's most revered intellectuals as signatories, including members of the US academic and artistic circles. The Coalition's spokesperson, Ramsey Clark, stated: "The terrorist United States surely got what it deserved. We wish a thousand Katrinas upon it! We hope the native populations of Louisiana and Mississippi turn on the US army units deployed in the region and liberate their land from Yankee imperialism. We welcome the formation of spontaneous Marxist resistance groups, whom the right-wing-controlled media continues to describe as 'looters.' This marks the beginning of the liberation of all of North America from the oppressive capitalist regime once known as the USA. We ask the other enlightened peoples and governments of the world to join us in withholding all financial, material, moral, spiritual, or any other kind of support from the capitalist hegemon and its incorrigible citizens." When a confused reporter brought up the fact that the US, both through taxpayer appropriations and private charitable contributions, provides more foreign aid per capita than any other industrialized nation in the world, the spokesman scoffed, "A few stingy hundred million to the tsunami victims? It's sickening to see such tightfistedness." 
A wave of rallies and marches flooded the world's major capitals yesterday. These mass demonstrations were spontaneously organized by progressive organizations and individuals of good will, and were all funded by George Soros's network of political charities. The participants proudly held posters and signs that said, "Katrina was engineered by Karl Rove to pump up oil prices!" "Stop Halliburton from rebuilding New Orleans and other civilian areas!" "End the illegal occupation of Louisiana and Mississippi by the Bush-Cheney national guardsmen!" and "Nature can't be wrong!" The general feeling at the marches was summed up in a street interview taken by a CNN correspondent in Jakarta. "The world's first impulse at hearing of the devastation was sympathy," said the randomly chosen protester in characteristically perfect English. "But George Bush squandered it all with his unilateral actions to stop people's suffering, and with his rush to send in the National Guard to evacuate people, prevent diseases, and stop the looting. He didn't even consult with the UN before he did that. If he had let the disaster run its natural course as it happens every year in Third World countries, where hundreds of thousands drown, starve to death, or die of water-borne illnesses, our hearts would naturally go out to the poor and the minorities who suffered most from the hurricane." Millions of dollars worth of aid goes annually to the inefficient and indifferent Third-World welfare governments who use natural disasters to lay their hands on some of the free pork. Not in this case. It is becoming obvious that the Bush Administration's unilateral rescue and relief efforts have brought the world together against America. |
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Yes, these are those other countries CNN oft raves about gloriously. It's nice to see people celebrate, even if it's over the misery of others.
