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Internet dating - love or sex?

Is it love that a person seeks or sex? The question strikes your mental chords at once. Some say that love without sex is not feasible and vice versa. This of course is in reference to committed relationship and not casual dating.

Single women and men seek relationship for dating on Internet. Online dating is now becoming the number one platform for seeking a date. This is usually done by becoming a member of an online dating agency or a dating site as it is most referred. More and more person including couples and swingers are seeking relationship in adult dating service. The benefits that the Net offers far surpasses that which a land based dating agency can deliver. Speed accessibility and cost are the main factors. The tremendous versatility and options that the internet dating delivers is another major reason for online dating becoming more and more popular.

The dating service accords anonymity to the user member, hence one can seek relationship without disclosing his or her details. Then does anonymity boost spirit of adventure and incites the suppressed erotic urge to surface not possible whence your identity is known.

If it does then people will not hesitate to experiment with their sexuality. Once the spirit is rekindled one looks forward to casual sex encounters. And, also entertain the hidden urge for alternative sex if any. The days of closeted affairs are over. If one wants then he can have sexual relationship without loosing face in a conservative society.

Sex dominates and it does dominate strongly in healthy human beings. Apart from those who believe in committed relationship, people do search fervently for sex on the Net. Men and Women seek love as well, but then for finding love many complex factors govern the chemistry of romance. Hence, compatibility is a serious issue on which love dating depends. In case of sex relationship, compatibility is less of an issue and physical attraction and sex appeal of a person is enough to make the match. Hence, sex is easy to find on the net than love relationship. In spite of all benefits, you need luck to find online romance.

You do find love online and often, but when sex is at your fingertips why hesitate. Join an adult dating site and search online personals ads. They will tell in details what human mind thinks of sexual relationship now.

edit by rvec: added sources (by Arnie and LukeakaDanish) and put all in quotes
next time please do so yourself
I feel that internet dating could be used for both. People looking for just sex can do it and same with people that actually want to get a relationship. If you can't find anyone in your close enviroment internet dating might be the only option for you and your feelings and reasons why you are doing it are just.
Internet dating has been construed as a way for lonely and shy men to find their partners. Often, internet dating is seen in a negative way for men to solicit sex from women. Certainly, it works the other way around too. But to simply equate internet dating with sex is simply naive.

I do agree that one needs to be careful since internet dating opens the door to the unknown and untested waters and you are pretty much on your own and unwise moves or naivety can land you in hot soup. Treated properly and carefully, it can open the door to many opportunities beyond one's own space and time.

Internet dating, therefore, is simply another outlet for socialization. Whether it is for sex or love is entirely up to the user. Similarly, visiting a bar or attending a friend's party can have the same effect, because the bottom line is what the individual has in mind. The only difference is that you don't get to "see" the person through internet in the first meet but then again, many have warned against first impressions.
I met my boyfriend and online, and honestly, we're both so shy that in real life we may have never met. So, thank God that we did.

It was totally accidental too. Like, we both joined OkCupid but I did it mostly for the surveys and never even realized it was a dating website. He was my first "match" and we started talking online. Now we've met in real life and are way happy.
In my opinion Internet dating is the spawn of evil. First of all you have no idea who you could be meeting, because of the security of it you could end up with a total creeper. Of course it is always suggested you meet in a public place it still is a little scary. Second i believe that there needs to be some sort of connection before someone can begin dating. If you were to tell someone that they would be dating a total stranger the would not believe you, but if you said they would find a relationship though Internet that is plausible. Even though they are the same one sounds better because society has made it the normal.

Thats my 2 cents,
I disagree on that. The only way things can really go wrong is when you make a mistake yourself. As long as you meet in public places and you remain carefull there isn't much that can go wrong. Of course you'll have to trust a person at a certain point but that's what relations are about. Same thing goes for a relation you have with everyone in your close enviroment.
I belong to an internet dating site , and just like life you could find love or sex there, depending on what you are looking for. It is not all about sex there, there are people who are looking for the real thing like myself. Life is too short and we have to enjoy it and accept where you are. I am so glad they have those sites, because where would you meet anyone.

Life is all about taking chances.
See, that's about what I said. Of course there are always a few people that screw up Razz
Yup I agree with Nancy!

Some just want some sex and some people looks for relationship. Sometimes good relationships starts from a steamy hot sex or may relationships turns out be just sex! Sometimes it's unpredictable.
I think that sex is a important part(not the most) of a relationship, which in terms of medicine we could call it physiologic process who needs to be done. If you love your partner you will probably get more pleasure in a relationship and in sexual moods too. What is to be mentioned is that sex without love makes things a bit weird, cause you will be learned with that kind of manner and then you will search that for always.
My personal experience, people who want to contact you by internet are 95% interested in having casual sex, the other 5% have become into my friends.

I haven't developed any romantic relationship through internet. But that 5% are valuable people who I like to have as friends.

Who knows, maybe in the future I meet a friend by internet who will become into a boyfriend, I let that door open.
Very Happy
Its not always necessary that internet dating has to be for sex. I met my gf through yahoo chat.
well, I have to say, silly things happen on the net man, it's crazy, all this stuff with children here, that's bad man! there are sooooo many pedophiles that is disgusting. And you know here in Germany, many twelve, or thirteen year old who absolutely want to have sexual experiences, use the chat to meet up with boys their age or a little older. and the use the net for that. and you know what? well, there are many problems now because many girls got raped or were victims of sexual harrassment by guys who lied about their age. I hate that stuff man, I know that some people that love each other met on the internet, but that should be done in some paying platforms, which are serious, and guarantee a certain quality and security.
What you mention are extremes, and something extremes always do is screw things up. The rules that are set are clear and as long as you use your head there isn't much that can go wrong. If you meet in public places and simply don't go to the guy's/girl's place there isn't very much that can go wrong. If it does, there will be other people around to help you because you're in a public area. It only goes wrong if people make less intelligent decisions.
It can be either I reckon. The internet is just another way of meeting people. Same in real life, some people are after love, others just the sex
Nancy43 wrote:
I am so glad they have those sites, because where would you meet anyone.

Life is all about taking chances.

Umm...not to dis internet dating sites...but come on! Where would you meet anyone? How about *anywhere* in the real world? Take a class...painting, yoga, martial arts, drawing, literature, poetry, dance, skiing, etc. The list goes on and on. Find *something* you enjoy and go out and DO it. Then, while you're there, open your eyes. Look around, see if you see anyone attractive. If so, go start a conversation with them. Is it really that difficult? I'm not trying to be rude here, but this just seems like a question that has soooooooo many obvious answers. And then you follow up with another "duh"

Life is all about taking chances. Yes...yes it is. So instead of sitting at a computer, go out and...umm...maybe, take a chance? There is so little risk involved in internet dating. Sure, you can still get turned down...but when it doesn't happen to your face, you don't feel nearly the same sort of disappointment. My whole point is that there are an infinite number of ways to meet someone. Why on earth choose something as "safe" as the internet to do so? And by safe I mean that you can nearly remove all possibility of disappointment. So what if "sexydude953" says he's not interested in meeting you in public? You probably don't know anything about him or even what he looks like, so what do you lose? Nothing!

Seriously! Find *anything* you enjoy doesn't matter if it's scuba diving, or bungee jumping, or drinking tea whilst listening to olde timey records on a phonograph. I'm sure there's a group of people out there that enjoy the same thing. Find them, go to their weekly meeting and interact with them socially. I guarantee you that if you actually do this, that at some point in your life, you'll discover another person exists that you find attractive who is also attracted to you. Then you take a real risk and ask them out.

The internet is a wonderful thing...but when you use it to replace social interaction it just sucks all the life out of...well, life. Seriously,'s not hard to go out and meet someone in the real world. Just find some confidence in yourself and then when you get hurt, get over it and move on and try again.
idk i think internet dating is for people who feel insecure of themselves or of their body... everyone could step up to someone and start talking irl or go to a speed dating cours... idk , i think Internet Dating is quite lame :/ and those people prolly look more for a one night stand than for a real lasting relationship
Poetsunited wrote:
idk i think internet dating is for people who feel insecure of themselves or of their body... everyone could step up to someone and start talking irl or go to a speed dating cours... idk , i think Internet Dating is quite lame :/ and those people prolly look more for a one night stand than for a real lasting relationship

theres nothing about feeling insecured. The thing is that through internet u get to meet a lot more people in a reasonably short time. As for myself i really didn't want to date some girl from my workplace. Or some girl whom i met through my friends. Internet was the next best option....

The best thing abt it is u can talk to the other person ur leisure and start to get to know her more then decide if u wanna meet up or not. I think its better than just to go to her and ask her if she wants to go out and then find out she cant stop blabbering about herself and starts to give me a headache
i guess internet dating is just for sex.
i think this differs depending on your age.
Who knows.
It seems to work for some poeple.
I know a few people who got together after meeting on the net and have very strong relationships.
For most young people I'd say its about sex. That all depends on what dating sites you visit.
i love romantic relationship .sex is a part of relationship and the one thing makes relationship getting good.
I've never dared to meet someone from internet before a long way talking and knowing each other on line. I don't accept webcam unless I have detailed data of the other person (mainly webcam request are to show you a p**** or beacause they what you to show them your b******. I also refuse to chat with people who don't show a photo of themselves in their profile.

This are minimal cautions, but they have been usefull to me.

The next rule is, if you are going to meet in person someone from internet, first, tell one of your friends or relatives where you go, meet the person in a public place, and if you are going to eat, buy your own food and drinks. It seems a little paranoid, but all caution tending to protect myself it's worthwile.
it didn't work on me;-( I guess I'm not as lucky as the others.I guess it depends on the person who will join any of internet dating sites.
I have heard about many good outcomes of people meeting on the Internet. Those are usually people with feet firmly on the ground and see the Internet realistically. Think it is a wonderful way of meeting people.
I don't think it's a bad thing. Except for the deception people can put on during the online conversations. But some people are honest out there. I see no reason to lie about things and I usually talk to women that seem pretty honest. I've only met one in person and she seemed fine. Dating is out of the question for me since I'm married but sex is all game if I can ever find the time. I know I'm a scumbag of a husband but at least I'm honest with it.
if love comes of it then great, if its just sex then no harm done Smile
Well i believe 98% of the time its all about sex and its plain and simple. The rest is just hard luck for people who go in for sex and later grows to become somthing else.
I don't believe in online dating services as a provider of a platform to find love, sex maybe but definitely not love. I've seen friends and others who could find love over the Internet or had long distance relationships and made it work for both sides, but none of them was using a dating site or service.

These services, at least to my point of view, can work well for finding a sex mate or for casual dating that may turn at a later time into a serious relationship but surely it would take time and a very long time to work out in addition to major effort on both sides if in any case the relation could develop.
Unluckily, internet dating tends too much to sex. I've found wonderful friends through internet (not sex at all) but not a single romantic relationship that last.

Now I have a way to early detect the casual sex seekers on line, and they receive a blocking from msn in the early stages, so I economize the boring of dumping they later.

I have friends who have found love online and indeed they have moved to another country to get married. I have never asked them how did it happen, but for them that was true love.
I have a friend who all they do is go in internet chat rooms and meet girls - they are totally obsessed with talkin over email, MSN or facebook - he finds girls from all sorts of social networking sites. More often than not it ends up in them having his phone number or he has theirs..

I think it's wrong because he just stays in the house and has no intention of actually creating real relationships with real people - all his communication is via the MSN, email or chat.. what kind of a basis is that for a relationship.

It's fine to send someone the odd funny email or something to perk up their day if they are in a dull office - but to actual try and build relationships with someone online - where's the fun in flirting, watching the other persons eyes when you say something they like or just watching them when they are in deep conversation and see what makes them come alive... your so missing out on all that - the butterflys when you arrange to meet.

Maybe i'm an old romantic but I'd always met someone face-to-face - if your remotely interested met up in a safe place, always ask a friend to maybe watch you from a distance - always check in with someone every hour or so so that they know your ok - always insist in getting yourself home the first couple of times and have your own local taxi firm or a friend pick you up. If your diving yourself park your car in a public place - I know these are extreme things to think about but you have to be cautions and if they are legitimate person who is keen on your then they would want you to be safe..

Hope I haven't rambled on too much
its more about sex, because in the first place, you visit or chat up with people with "impresssive" profiles..
I met my first girlfriend online Embarassed , and honestly, we're both so shy that in real life we may have never met. So, thank God that we did.
@ stuckinaditch:

Yes, I agree to seek safety first though in your friend's case it might be due to his personality like being shy or have low self esteem. I agree again that spending the whole day chatting to find girls is the wrong way to find the right girl, but sometime it happens and people find their 'soul mate' online.

Be assured that you are not the old romantic type. At some time, they will have to meet in the real world for the relation to keep going. And that's the time when specially girls have to take safety measures.

Chinmoy concluded the dating services in one line;
its more about sex, because in the first place, you visit or chat up with people with "impresssive" profiles..

But again, sometimes it works for these services as not everyone is looking for the same thing.

@ bsbteng:
I hope you have a hood and healthy relation out there. You may be a live proof that online dating services or online relations in general can work sometime.
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