A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck and everyone inside dies. They then get to meet their maker and because of the grief they have experienced, he decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise. They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is.
"I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.
The second one in line hears this and says, "I want to be gorgeous too."
Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.
This goes on for a while but when God is halfway down the line, the last guy in line starts laughing. When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing his rear off. Finally, God reaches this guy and asks him what his wish will be. The guy calms down and says: "Make them all ugly again."
A young woman went to her doctor complaining of pain. "Where are you
hurting?" asked the doctor. "You have to help me, I hurt all over", said the
woman. "What do you mean, all over?" asked the doctor, "be a little more
specific." The woman touched her right knee with her index finger and yelled,
"Ow, that hurts." Then she touched her left cheek and again yelled, "Ouch! That
hurts, too." Then she touched her right earlobe, "Ow, even THAT hurts", she
cried.
The doctor looked at her thoughtfully for a moment and asked, "Are you a
natural blonde?" "Why, yes," she said.
"I thought so," said the doctor, "You have a broken finger.
An American came to watch a game of cricket. He watched the first over where the batsmen scored two runs. At the end of the over the Umpire called "Over" At this the American got up and said "Nice game, but it's a bit short".
*Sardar: Doctor help me, main jab baat karta houn to mujhe sirf awaaz sunai
deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt.
* Angry sardar-Oye main is duniya ko mita dunga.. mita dunga.. mita dunga.
Another sardar standing besides said main tujhe rubber hi nahi dunga.
*Santa singh: Can u spell a word tht has more thn 1000 letters in it?
Banta singh: Post office.
* Sardar on cycle hit lady accidently, lady says," break nahi mar sakta tha
kya?"
Sardar replies "break ka kya hai, poori cycle to mar di....."
* Sardarji zebra crossing ke black & white patte par bar bar idhar-udhar
chalta tha, woh kya soch raha hoga....
think.............
"SALA YE PIANO BAJTA KYO NAHI"
*What is the full form of singh
s-sardar i-insaan n-nahi g-gadha h-hai.
*Sardar:Aap kitna padhe ho?
Friend: B.A.
Sardar: kamal karte ho yaar sirf do word padhe aur woh bhi ulta.
* ..A friend asks sardar how was ur exam?
Sardar: It was ok but I couldnt answer past tense of THINK. I thought,
thought & finally i wrote 'THUNK'.
* Sardarni asks her lover,"Santa dear, if we get engaged, will u give me a
ring?"
"Sure" replies santa. "Whats ur phone no?"
An old lady walked into a store got some cat food and at the register ready to pay the clerk said; "before you pay, we need proof you own a cat cause some people buy it and eat it themselves", so she goes home gets her cat buys the cat food and goes home. The next day the same old lady walks in and grabs dog food goes to the register and the cashier tells her again "we need proof you own a dog cause some people buy the food and eat it themselves�, so she went home got her dog bought the food and went home. The next day she walks in with a little box and goes to the cashier and asks her to put her finger in the box, the cashier responds "no way " the old lady assures her there is nothing in the box that would harm her so she stuck her finger in and felt something mushy with a foul smell and asks �what is thissssss, $hit or something???" and the old lady replies "yes� so can I buy some toilet paper now"?
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