yeah i was dating this chick over xbox, we were dating for about 3 months, and we had everything in common. and 1 day she dumped me one random day. she dumped me because i was not talking enough(she sais). but i still really like her and i cannot stop thinking about her. i would play xbox with her for about 5 hours a day, everyday. now can 1 person on this forum honestly say that they can talk to a chick about anything interesting for 5 hours a day 7 days a week without repeating anything? that was my problem i couldnt. i couldnt ask anything about her because i already knew everything about her from previous converstions. i would have gone to meet her but she lives all the way in England and i live in vermont. we had made plans in march for me to go visit in feb. and i have already spent 180$ on passports, and i am so close to getting there. i had gotten a job so i could earn enough money for the plane ticet and have spending money. but yeah she dumped me and now i need anyones help. i had read online that the best way to get an ex back is by making her jealous. so i got another girlfriend named erica, from where i work. and the girl from England knows i am going out with her. and she told me she was happy for me, so does that mean she is not getting jealous? and i dont like the girl from work nearly as much as the girl from England. does anyone have any ideas how i could get the english girl back? because honestly i have never been dumped, and i dont know how to deal with this, and this is my first online relationship. thanks to anyone who helps.
This is not what you want to hear but relationships are hard enough without having to deal with an ocean separating you. You are probably better off. It will take some time to get over her but it will happen.
You probably should not be involved with Erica right now either. It is not fair to her since you admittedly started the relationship to make your previous girlfriend jealous.
girls like these can be problems.. you should just let go and don't worry, you will get over it..
One cannot force things either this side or that side....
It is something like you throw an air ball into the sea. If it comes to you after sometime, then it is yours. Else move on.
There are more balls available in the world, to be thrown into the sea
Keep Rocking boy.......
First step, stop waisting erica´s time, she does not desrve to get caught up in this. mmmm about the english girl I would not try to make her jealous, you are using a destructive approach to try and yield a constructive result.
To start with I would talk to this english girl preferably on the phone so she can hear your voice, I recommend that you come clean with her and explain first of all
Erica make it clear to your english girl that you where only trying to make her jealous and you know it was a foolish thing to do and you will never repeat it .
Then express how you feel about her, not too much as you are not physically together so at a distance it will be easy for her to feel smuthered by over whelming words.
and due to my experience with girls and english girls in particular, basically I think she may have got bored and its not your fault its only natural to run out of things to talk about when you not experiencing life together (actually I think you did great keeping it up so long).
I think parallel to her boredem she got frustrated, so explain how you feel this should help and try to present your plans, give her hope to run on and then follow through by making it a reality.
You are the only one who knows exactly to what level your relationship went so you should be able to find the words to mend this problem without creating other problems.
cheers and good luck
You know what I think? I think by reading your question I can answer it. Really, I've always consider myself good at answering and giving advice to people. REally like helping people. But this time it is different with you. Maybe this isn't the best way to do it but I will take a chance it will help you. Ok?
You have to stop thinking that way. Listen to her. Don't play stupid games. If she is happy for you that means she is happy for you. How can you use someone like that? The person you are seeing now you should tell her how you feel. At the very least say you are just being friendly and thats it.
If something is over its over for a reason. Listen, if you really like or love someone you let them go and if they come back to you then you know it was meant to be and if they don't they don't. Its that simple.
Its not a conquest or a method to get the hot chick. What are you? Someone that wants to be close to someone special or someone that is ... well just move on ok.
By the way, the more you get to know someone the more interesting it should become. Dialog should get easier and better. Its not about topics and infomation its about sharing at that point. This is maybe the best advice you will get anywhere and its free. Take it.
That I think is your answer. Hope it didn't sound too harsh but I think its the truth.
From the many people I've met (and also from personal experience), I can say that I don't believe long distance relationships ever work. You have an entire ocean separating you, and you haven't met each other once. I'm surprised it lasted even 3 months. What you probably had with this girl is an extraordinary friendship, not more. You should be looking at getting over it rather than getting her back. I know it'll probably be harder to do that because of the fact that you've spent so much time and money on trying to go to England to meet her, but look at it this way. You now have a passport, and if you work hard enough, you could end up with someone special in a few years, and take her to England for your honeymoon. (Or maybe even some other place in Europe worth visiting!).
As for Erica, I really agree with everyone else here... you're cheating her by not being truthful about your feelings for her. If she REALLY likes you, but you really like the English girl, you are cheating Erica.
And I don't really know who told you that the best way to get an ex back was to make her jealous. I don't think that's true. Even if your ex does come back to you because of the jealousy, you will probably end up having the same problems that caused you to break up initially.
yes i agree.. don't waste Erica's times. and don't waste your time too.. maybe you should just think about what you want in your relationships before getting into one..
I think you should just move on b/c there are plenty of other people out there, some that you'll actually meet in person who you'll find that you have lots in common, not just addicted to xbox, but other things that you like. A relationship that started over xbox can't be too promising.
Yeh don't be too hard on yourself. Often when someone gives you a reason for breaking up, it's just a convenient reason, and not the truth. Could be any number of reasons why she broke it off, maybe the distance was a factor or she met someone else.
i had a long distance relationship once. it was me, living in florida, and my best friends cousin which i didn't know was his cousin and got a random IM on aim from her one day, i guess she got the wrong s/n from somebody she knew who knew her cousin. i dont know its confusing. anyway we started talking and hit it off. after about a year of talking i asked her out and omg we were so perfect. i know what you mean about the 5 hour phone conversations and never running out of things to say. except ours were for 8 hours. dont ask how lol but she can TALK, i threw in my comments every now and then but understood her thats what counts. long story short, i ended up dumping her because i explained to her that long distance relationships are great but we need people we can physically see and be with. she understood me but cried... i felt so bad because we were so good together. so do you think that your english girl is thinking this same thing? anyways about this erica chick she seems cool and i've dated a girl at work before, it gets too involving and somehow never works out lol. don't be down bro, THERE ARE SO MANY GIRLS IN THIS WORLD! right now i'm sooo happy with my girlfriend of 9 months now, and i believe that we are so perfect we will be together forever. BUT if this doesnt work out i'm not going to fret, like i said, there are many girls. dont be depressed or anything man please you dont deserve that. your a person and if she hurt you just maybe try what they suggested and try just talking to her but other than that maybe she isnt' the one...
one thing you have to concider about your ex is you may not know her as well as you think. although she may have "told you everything" you have to keep in mind..what would happen if you would have gone all that way and spent all the money..then when you see her that connection you had online..wasn't there in real life. I'm not saying it isn't possible..i met my fiance on line and i have never been more happy.
like the others said..stop waisting erica's time..you can't play people like that it isn't right.
if you and your ex were really meant to be together..you will be, so don't worry about it.
but keep talking to her..don't let her forget what you were like.
there is this quote i read earlier today i think you might understand it.
"if you let your love go and it comes back, it is yours forever,
if you let your love go and you never see it again...it wasn't meant to be"