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Were or Are you the bully or the bullied?

Are/Were You the Bully or the Bullied?
I'm A Bully / I Was A Bully
 5%  [ 4 ]
I'm The Bullied / I Was The Bullied
 39%  [ 27 ]
I Am/Was Both
 18%  [ 13 ]
I Am/Was Neither
 36%  [ 25 ]
Total Votes : 69

All my life I seemed to be the one that didn't do anything to defend or fight... I've never been the one to "make fun of the weak" ...or the laugh of all jokes. It might have been due to the fact that I moved around a lot and never had a chance to actually mold into any one type of group. I've always been drawn to the outsiders of the outsiders if that makes any sense. The "group" that I've always hung around with have always had a diversified quality no matter which city I lived in.

But that's just me, what about you - are or were you the bully or the bullied?

I was bullied a little bit, but eventually people grew up and moved on. It helped a bit that I played a bit of sport and got out a bit during my school days, despite my size. Very Happy
eh I dont bully but I mess around and people take it wrong way and nobody bullies me you kiden that suicide
I personally was never bullied, but I never saw the reason to be a bully either.

Can someone explain the relevence of this topic before is is spamcanned?
I don't exactly know where you would classify me in this...

I was neither the bully nor the bullied...

I mean yeah, people tried to push me around... and I got into fights with them... but I kicked their butt... then their friend would have to come and try to take me down, and no matter how much I told them I didn't want to fight... I would keep getting into fights... only lost one...

but I guess you could say that I got bullied... cause I never started any fights... but I sure had my fair share of them...
I were bullied some years.

-- extremely long post but I don't want to go into detail
I was never bullied.

Unfortunately, I did make some enemies. I have been in a few fights, but I ended them quite quickly. I used to play hockey, and I know enough about physics to know F = M * V^2. Therefore, I know how to brace for impact, and that speed yields an enormous amount of force. They didn't stand a chance... But I still feel bad about it, I should be peaceful. Oh well, there is no convincing some people Laughing
{name here}
I stayed out of the way of others, and others stayed out of the way of me.
I don't get bullied, and don't bully. I really haven't seen bullying either. Though, incidentally, today I think I may have come close to being bullied - this older person came up and said angrily "Who do you think you are!" His arm grabbed my shoulder and as I was about to say "A person" a teacher came and the student said "Yeah, you're going to be president!" Very Happy
I was always neutral, I didnt trouble anyone and no one troubled me. I was usually quiet, stuck to myself and most people that I knew off didn't have a problem with me so I got along with everyone. Wasnt too good those days with the girls though but thats a different story lol
I'm sort of the nice kid, I never say hateful things, or go around talking about people behind their backs.... I'm nice, if I have something mean to say, I won't say it at all and keep it to myself.

I especially like to make friends with the kids I don't like. Smile I'd rather have a friend than an enemy.

I'm the peace-loving one, I don't like fighting, and haven't really been in any real fights, outside of the boxing matches at a friend's house.

So I was never really bullied, and definitely never was the bully.
neither when i was studying... i did not like doing such things, not because i dont want to ( i wanna try to bully someone in fact ). But i think the one being bullied would be hurt, would feel pain.... s/he suffers.... i dont like the feeling of seeing someone crying or feeling sad in front of me... i dont know how to do to make them "restore to normal" and become happy.... you can say it's sympathy.. but i dont quite agree...

my girlfriend is being bullied sometimes by her classmates.... she said it's ok, not much matter... but i still wanna do something to cheat them....
i used to be the bullied, but like someone said, people grow up. they've stopped now.
I was never bullied, mostly cuz I am being respected and got some good and powerfull friends ;] I also never bullied anyone cuz I don't have it in me to be mean for other people for no reason, even though I may joke and criticize them it's always for a good reason ;]
i was one of the smallest people in my school all the way through high school. through junior high i was the smallest in my class.

i went to private christian schools my whole life, and even there i couldn't avoid the bully's, they are just there. its like what would life be without bullys?

although, i did get my revenge on one once. In elementary school our playground was covered in almond shells and pebbles, and so this bully on the teeter totter would throw a handful of them at me everytime he came down to the ground, due to the fact that i was sitting on a bench nearby. so after a couple handfuls in the face, i picked up a plum sized rock and beaned him in the head, knocking him off the device. of course, i ended up in the principals office due to it, but he started it. nyah.

in HS i ended up friends with a few of them, and one of the elementary school bullies (not rock 2 the head bully) grew up to be a youth pastor, so we have sorta patched things up since then.

but yeah, i was one of the bullied.
I believe to an extent, I was a bully, but of the kind who kept other bullies off teh back of little kids

Say like, I used to bully the bullies, coz I was a BIG BOY!
i got bullied rather alot when i was younger
came home with lots of bruises
i always wondered why someone would bully someone else
but i came to the conclusion they don't really need a reason
at least i don't think they do
it is a bit sad that some kids end up being bullies
but maybe they have some issue's themself and the picking on other kids make them feel better
i don't know
either way
no matter what time or place, there will always be bullies and those who are bullied
well i used to be tesed about my blindness but when in grade 3 i gave somone what was tesing me that was in grade a bloody nose all the teazing stopped!
Well in this imperfect world where there is chaos and disorder, you will usually encounter people who are bullied or if not they are the bully. As for my case, it was when in my elementary and high school years when the word "bullied" and the "bully" were the most popular words especially on boys. Everyday there was the bad guy who always rules and the geeks and the cast away people who always dream of "killing" the bad guy. Before, I was the bully and was the bullied guy. I may say it takes turn. But as I grow up, these words eventually fades.
Its amazing how few admit to bullying... Although, given the nature of the people on this board, it is believable.
I have lived the same of this picture at below, but there was a boy instead of the girl in picture.But i generally don't want to be bully.Just a few things make me bully , such as when somebody stares at me.

ctrlTR wrote:
I have lived the same of this picture at below, but there was a boy instead of the girl in picture.But i generally don't want to be bully.Just a few things make me bully , such as when somebody stares at me.

Lots of people stare at other people, true... Sure...

But how is that a reason to go up to him/her and start bullying him emotionally or physically? He just looked in your direction, you catch his eye, he doesn't look away, and you're blinded by a white hot flash of fury?
I was bullied somewhat, as I didn't know who I was. I didn't communicate very well, and I didn't have social skills at all. I opened myself up to the bullying. Until I figured out that they would leave me alone if I was confident I was doing what I wanted to do, I got picked on.

Now, I build robots and program computers; the skills that are required to do those are valued by my peers, so they don't make fun of it anymore. I am confident that I want to be programming and I am happy with it, and others leave me alone about it.

And I've developed some non-sucky social skills, but that's a different story.
Neither really I mean I got picked on a little bit but I didn't take it I fought back I punched a few people in the nose and it didn't happen any more.
This is little different for my country Very Happy here , there is no reason to stare at a person.If a person stares at you here , He/She certainly has got a reason to stare at you and if you ask her/his the reason.He/She will likely explain you about her/his staring at you.This event sometimes ends with friendship and sometimes ends with hostility.If the people are a girl and a boy who are about of the same age,it might end with love Very Happy If your rival cannot explain her/his reason to stare at you , you can feel free yourself to bully her/him Laughing

TheGustav wrote:
ctrlTR wrote:
I have lived the same of this picture at below, but there was a boy instead of the girl in picture.But i generally don't want to be bully.Just a few things make me bully , such as when somebody stares at me.

Lots of people stare at other people, true... Sure...

But how is that a reason to go up to him/her and start bullying him emotionally or physically? He just looked in your direction, you catch his eye, he doesn't look away, and you're blinded by a white hot flash of fury?
I was bullied during my elementary school years. I was new to the school (and America) at the time, so I couldn't tell my problems to the teachers. I don't think I woulda have told anybody even if I knew how to speak English.

I had two bullies when I was in elementary school. Both girls. Of which one apologized during the first year of middle school and the other, I didn't see after elementary school.

Of course since this was in elementary school, I didn't get beat up or anything like that. Just small stuff like taking away my crayons, making fun of me, or just being very annoying.
I must confess that I have been bullied by others during my childhood and now adulthood.I have been bullied by relatives,friends,bosses,colleagues and those inimical to me and my interests. Mostly, I have responded meekly to such situations though I feel anger and resentment deep within. I feel it is futile to pay back in kind to those bullying you as this would further aggravate matters. I strongly feel that those who wish to dominate others showed marked tendency towards bullying others to impress ther ``power'' and ``dominance''.
The humiliation sometimes becomes intolerable when you are bullied by a close relative---be it parents,sister or wife.
I must confess that I have been bullied by others during my childhood and now adulthood.I have been bullied by relatives,friends,bosses,colleagues and those inimical to me and my interests. Mostly, I have responded meekly to such situations though I feel anger and resentment deep within. I feel it is futile to pay back in kind to those bullying you as this would further aggravate matters. I strongly feel that those who wish to dominate others showed marked tendency towards bullying others to impress ther ``power'' and ``dominance''.
The humiliation sometimes becomes intolerable when you are bullied by a close relative---be it parents,sister or wife.
I have been bullied just a little when I was on the 3rd, 4th and 5th classes, but not after that. Bullying is really a terrible problem in schools!!!! Evil or Very Mad

But it is one of those things which has always been and which will always be. Sad
Well, all my light i was teased because i am overweight / just plain FAT it never bothered me once, i just went to my classes and went come the teasing one lasted like 1 week till the notice it was working on my then they started on another student!.
Well I do not have that many experiences about being bullied or bullying another person. I am just a neutral guy but there are are a few incidents that I remember where I bullied or was bullied.

In the 1st grade I joined a new school and this guy comes up and starts attacking me for no reason. He hit me whenever he saw me, poked my leg with a compass once and he even pulled my leg and made me fall from a desk (yes I was on the desk trying to tie my shoelaces and I had no manners too). Then one day I stood up to him and fought with him. He was no match for my strength and he cried. He stopped bullying or talking from that day.

In the 3rd grade there was this another crazy guy who used to scare me like hell. When returning from school he used to take me all the way to his house so that he would have a friend to accompany him. His house was very far from mine and I had to walk all the way back to my house. If I said no to him I would get beaten up. I ended this problem by telling my mom.

Then in the 7th grade I bullied a kid. The kid was very greedy and he did not share his water and even did not allow anyone to sit with him on the bus. People did not have a place to sit and he used to have an empty seat beside him where noone could sit or he would charge. I used to beat him up, slap him, steal his water, jump on him on the bus and sit forcefully next to him. Then came a day when I punched him in the forehead and his forehead was swollen up really big. His parents found out and took me to the principle where I got a really nice beating and I stopped.

Finally in the 9th grade another guy came and he used to scare me. He did not beat me or anything but used to scare me by shouting at me. I was really afraid of him. One day I just punched him three times and he cried.

These were all the bullying experiences that I faced and still remember. But the most ironic thing is that out of these 4 guys 3 are my friends now. I don't know what happened to the 7th grade kid.
Throughout middle school, I was teased because I was overweight. It really got to me sometimes. I remember crying myself to sleep at night. Thoughts of suicide. Thoughts of cutting. The latter two I have never gone through with (obvious with the suicide thing Shocked ).

And what happened was I started teasing other people, in an attempt to scrape up what little self-esteem I could find for myself. Eventually the pattern broke as I switched to drinking almost all water (occaisonal pop) and got slightly more physically active... I've lost a good 30 pounds since even summer!

And looking back, it was the wrong choice, but it was all I could see.

So I was both - the bullied, and, at times, the bully!
I think everyone is a bit of both - some people just do't realize it.
I know some people who insist that htey are pacifists, and some who have a bot of a victim complex; they would insist that they are bullied a lot and have never/ would never bully anyone.
And yet there are times when these people manipulate and forcefully (if not physically) insist they get their own way -- is that not a form of bulling?

And I know some other people, who figure they're "tough" and they "never let anyoe walk on them" and they always get their own way.
Yet, because of their bullheadedness, people don't want to co-operate with them. These people get teh short end of the stick all of the time. They are lied to, people go behind their backs, etc.
I guess, technically, they may not be bullied on a regular basis> But they certainly are no less "victims" than anyone else. Also, there's always someone out there who's meaner than they are...
never bullied... wouldnt let it happpen 2 me, no one stepped 2 me...

didnt bully.. i fight alot back in the day... push sum ppl around cos they needed puttin in place.. but not bullyin
suppose im a bit of both....

i was bullied but then after a while i turned the tables...

although i consider myself more of a vigilante hahaha! Laughing
I think everyone in school was bullied, or bullied others at some point. There's always going to be someone weaker/nerdier that an average kid will pick on. And nerdy kids might pick on even more nerdy kids... etc. Personally, I was never bullied. Just be nice, dont act like a dork, and everyone usually accepts you.

Bullying is just a way of showing the person you are bullying that they are better then you.
I suppose I am lucky, I never really experienced any (with minimal exceptions) bullying throughout my life. I do not take this for granted either, like I said... I am lucky. I tend to get along with everyone pretty well, and avoid those that cause trouble.

I'm surprised to hear about so many people getting bullied in their adult life - that has got to make work dreadful. However, if it's severe enough I'm sure there are avenues to tread that will yield helpful results in any workplace.
I use to beat up boys who would make fun of me when I was in Grade 4,5, and 6. They would say a bunch of things then I would chase them and kick them where it counts. I was also the one if any of my girl friends had any problems with boys at that time I was the one who would take care of the situation. I was the tall girl in the class though. I did grow out of it of course but I would not really call it bullying we would physically hurt each other as well it wasn't just me hurting them. When I do look back on it though i could say that it was bullying in a sense. In grade 7 it changed instead i got interested in boys.
i have nvr been bullied by anyone except my frnds!!

nor i have bullied anyone xcept my frnds

Mr. Green
I'm not sure if being a bully would suit me. I never really bullied anyone. I don't harass people, nor do i take lunch money and punch them in the face if they refused.

I would just make fun of them, not in a serious way, but they would often take it personal.
I used to get bullied all the time when I was a kid. I loved playing soccer, but three other girls on the team used to gang up and throw soccer balls at my head. Then there was another time when a fourth girl dragged me across the field for no reason. I never bothered anyone, but I guess I was an easy target because I was (and still am) so shy.

I also had a couple of neighbors who disliked my brother and me. They used to throw rocks at us whenever we'd ride our bikes past their house (which was hard not to do because we live on a tiny, dead-end street), and they didn't even stop after I got one of my front teeth chipped by another neighbor who threw a rock at my face. There were a lot of things said in school as well, but I'm not even going to get into that.

Although no one bothers me anymore, I honestly think that all that childhood bullying is what turned me into such a pessimist.
While in school I was the bullied (but fought back Smile ) but when i got in highschool the things changed..I had to bully some kids because they were used to it and if you didn't treat them that way they would have made fun of you... so it was like Bully me if you don't want me to make fun of you... sad but true Smile
Neither, you can call me a silent observer actually. I don't know why I was never bullied, maybe because I had better physique than my average looking mates. Sometimes I'm too lazy to get annoyed.
They tried to bully me but failed.
Captain Fertile
I was mid way up the food chain at school. I was bullied and I bullied kids weaker than me.

To this day I feel bad about the bullying I used to do, especially to one kid in particular. A few years back I met him in a night club and we had a good old chat and I was able to say sorry for the way I treated him back in school - I even bought him a drink. We parted on good terms so I don't feel as bad as I did.

Its not nice to bully and I know that there will be hell to pay if any of my kids are bullied the way i was at school. There is nothing wrong with kids working out their 'pecking order' but systenmatic and frequent bullying is pretty evil.
Yeah i can say that through high school i wasnt bullied a single bit. i did pick on kids but i never had any physical contact with any of them. just a little names here and there. nothing real big i guess you could say. In highschool, middle school, and elementary, i just tried to be friends with just about anyone and everyone. im not the type of person to do that stuff anymore(bullying). im more of a chillax kind of guy that likes to hang out with his buddies.
I've always tried to help the weak from getting bullied but never bullied anyone myself. I never got bullied either Smile
Well, I've never been 'bullied', bothered here and there, but nothing that I would consider 'bullying'... So yeah, I'm guessing I'm a lucky one... Right smack in da' middle...
I was the bullied, because I was an easy victim.

I didn't know how to defend myself (not physicaly, but mentally). I just let people bully me, without reacting. I outgrow that later on, as I built myself some strong personality.

I didn't have an easy childhood because of that though...
i was actually bullied when i was younger, was actually nearly killed through it , i would love to have my revenge but i always think to myself "i don't stoop as low as bullies" so really it is behind me now, but i have the big bad memory of it Sad
I got bullied a few times but it was never as bad as what I saw on tv with someone trying to take your lunch money or stuff. I lived in the city and it wasn't too bad.

It's more like incidents where I would back down on something when a conflict happend.
I was both. Bullies bully me and in return, I bully them back. I think that it would be somehow unfair if I wouldn't fight back since they would do it to me over and over again and I do not want that to happen. Therefore, I fight back.
I remember that in my elementary years I was bullied quite a bit (well, more like teased incessantly) once my mom insisted, upon the recommendation of a friend of hers, to transfer to a "better" school that was closer to home. I was seven at the time when I first transferred, and within weeks, it became clear that my English wasn't very "fluent," to say at the least. I'd get questions like "what is 2 + 1," to which I would reply "3," which would come out in a "dree" way (my parents weren't, and still aren't very fluent in English). What followed was an annoying bout of teasing; I made my first friend from the girl who helped me improve my English.

By the time I was nine, a girl and a group of her friends made it their lifelong goal to make my life unpleasant; their bullying ranged from stealing my pencils and pens, then accusing me of stealing them from her when I tried to take them back. I had friends even turn on me for that girl.

When I was ten, I unfortunately found myself to be the doormat to 75% of the class; they didn't exactly enjoy that my teacher loved how smart I was (the year before, I was probably at risk of failing the fourth grade, but I cleaned up my act).

Elementary school wasn't a fun time for me; middle school proved to be less painful, but it still had its problems.
I was bullied.
But I never let it get to me.
I never got bullied, I don't know why, I think its because I personally knew most of the bully's, I wasn't particularly friendly with them though. I always tried to help anyone that was being bullied.
High school was the worst 5 years of my life, I was this miserably socially inept, awkward, frustrated, angry lump who despised every one around, had no friends and picked on or sneered at by all. I spent my time stewing in mute embarassment and rage or wagging school. To be honest I think it stood me in good stead - I never had the pressures of trying to be popular (it was just never going to happen), and though every minute was hell it was a long time ago, and I learned a lot about people. These days I am much more socially adept and my experience (which carried on right through college, I changed, or as I prefer to think of it 'grew into myself' when I was 20) has ensured I'm very independent and self reliant, as well as always on the side of the underdog. I think my time was better spent reading (ok and crying and hating and stewing and plotting Razz)instead of drinking cider in parks (not that theres anything wrong with that, I do it quite often these days).
I used to be a bit of a loner and a think people picked on me because they were intimated by me (because I was very independent and petty smart and capable) - that was Primary School

Anyway, I'm at College (High School in the USA) now, and no ones gonna pick on me now, I'm too self secure and have many friends.

Bring it on Wink I don't care what other people think because
"Those the matter don't mind, and those that mind don't matter"

I'm gonna be myself Laughing Very Happy Laughing
I was never the one who was bullied and never did I bully anyone. Never entered a fight (well almost never) and the first one to stop one. I was somehow the nicest guy in class and friends with all, someone who was (and is) always ready to help. Maybe they never bullied me because I was the one who had it great with the teachers and would certainly be the guy to rescue them from their punishments and stuff. I loved being the nicest guy, and I hope it remains this way all my life.
I used to be bullied a looong time ago, when I was about 10-13. I set myself up as a weakling and I wasn't much of a social character, so people felt the need to bug me.

That experience is one of the reasons I decided to toughen up (physically and mentally) over the past few years.
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