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Words Of Wisdom

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glenn83e
Here is a poem that I wrote... figured I would let everyone enjoy it

Words Of Wisdom

Don't think you can....
Know you can!
Your human body is the most inpressive tool that you will ever own.
Even if you can't control everything......
You can always control something.
Your body......
use it......
amuse it......
because one day.....
You're gonna lose it!
raaeft1
All can be done if the God touch is there----Sri Aurobindo writes in Savitri.
CtrlAltDeleteDie
Deep and intellectual. Very Happy
darrenpaul
lol...very nice poem. Like already said...very deep!
exarkun
darrenpaul wrote:
lol...very nice poem. Like already said...very deep!
Haha, that sounds wrong to me. Twisted Evil
Captain Fertile
If that's poetry I like it! Smile

I struggle understanding poetry a lot of the time but this seems straight-forward and imparts wisdom.

Its good.
Hunterseaker
Nice poettry, I like the text and the message behind it.
You should make more, and show it to us!
sbel
this one shouldnt be continued. most nice poems are short Wink
rightclickscott
CtrlAltDeleteDie wrote:
Deep and intellectual. Very Happy


Not really. It seemed more like something some guy wrote thinking he was being deep and intellectual. When will people learn that poems are never good if they don't rhyme and carry a beat, as well as have a real meaning behind them, blatent or not? I would show you how it's done, but I'm a lazy f***.
RubySlasher
Poems don't need to rhyme. But they must always have a beat. Or at least some sort of complex form or crazy useless grammatical marks such as , ' ; - and the ever cool –
Or they need to use really kicky, sweet bombastic words.

But hey, let's share poems. I wrote this one on Valentines day


A Novelty Heart Ring

What could bring more joy
than an idealized fancy;
Sentimentality,
stretched to where its pressure
weakens and whitens
this plastic heart: glued, onto a
child-sized ring, which fits no
adult's hand.
What connotations this toy bears!
How many men have preformed
romance into silly notions,
silly such as this.
Obsessions that seem equally prominent,
consuming of their kitschy minds
-this plastic notion snaps in my
hand from a slightest twinge,
the ring rips up from its hollow
back-
Self discovery prevails such notions,
discoveries just as absurd.
-the broken notion lay in pieces
some steps back where I forgot.
Somewhere.
-On the floor-
rightclickscott
RubySlasher wrote:
Poems don't need to rhyme.


I know, but great ones do.
Yantaal
rightclickscott wrote:
RubySlasher wrote:
Poems don't need to rhyme.


I know, but great ones do.


you seem pretty narrow minded

Quote:
I saw thee once- once only- years ago:
I must not say how many- but not many.
It was a July midnight; and from out
A full-orbed moon, that, like thine own soul, soaring,
Sought a precipitate pathway up through heaven,
There fell a silvery-silken veil of light,
With quietude, and sultriness, and slumber,
Upon the upturned faces of a thousand
Roses that grew in an enchanted garden,
Where no wind dared to stir, unless on tiptoe-
Fell on the upturn'd faces of these roses
That gave out, in return for the love-light,
Their odorous souls in an ecstatic death-
Fell on the upturn'd faces of these roses
That smiled and died in this parterre, enchanted
By thee, and by the poetry of thy presence.


edgar alan poe "To Helen"

that is just a clip, but that dont rhyme, and he is one of the the greatest poets of all time.

so....
ninjakannon
RubySlasher wrote:
Poems don't need to rhyme. But they must always have a beat. Or at least some sort of complex form or crazy useless grammatical marks such as , ' ; - and the ever cool –
Or they need to use really kicky, sweet bombastic words.

Poems do not need too rhyme, you're right; @ rightclickscott: some of the best poems don't rhyme.
Poems don't need to have any beat at all, some of the best do not have beat nor rhyme. Quite frankly, it would be hard for a poem not to have form. Oh, and about "crazy useless grammatical marks" - they're not crazy or useless; you might see them as such but that merely shows how little you appreciate the difficulty to write a poem with real quality. The grammar is used to punctuate the poem in a way which improves the way the poem reads, sounds (in terms of beat, amongst other things) and also portrays meaning. A use of intellectual words doesn't always benefit a poem, but if the purpose or message is such that "bombastic" words will act as assets to a poem then why not use them? After all, they do sound good.

I just thought I'd have a go at a poem, to demonstrate; see below:
____

Entrapped yet sheltered behind those ever steady
Bars of metaphorical steel;
Echoing voice cries through,
To be harshly torn and trampled down
Into lonely oblivion.

And although the crushed souls do utter
Words of agreement,
The actions of those brave wretches
Are put before Hell's gate and asked kindly to step on through.
No one thinks to aid these battered

And betrayed poor fools.
There is no one to aid them
For such an act would be treading too far into the treacherous
Land of illegality and immorality. Certainly, this would be cursed as
Politically Incorrect.

Thus: Our Fair World.
____

In this I've used more than the things you've mentioned; I've included techniques like enjambment, for example.

Last edited by ninjakannon on Tue Feb 27, 2007 8:16 pm; edited 1 time in total
rightclickscott
Yantaal wrote:
you seem pretty narrow minded


You just think you're open minded.

I understand all the stuff you are saying. All of you, not just Yantaal. Many of you think that a poem that doesn't ryhme is still art. This is my point of view. Poems that ryhme are just more entertaining, and that's all I'll listen to poetry for. Entertainment value. Many people like to get out their feeling in poetry, they express their deepest beliefs. Many people use satire or just write poetry to feel like they're artistic. As arrogant or as cynical as it may seem, people write poetry for the wrong reasons. While many of you just think I'm a guy who likes to ryhme, it's much more than that. But, poetry couldn't be further from my mind. For me, it's all about entertainment.
glenn83e
RubySlasher wrote:
Poems don't need to rhyme. But they must always have a beat. Or at least some sort of complex form or crazy useless grammatical marks such as , ' ; - and the ever cool –
Or they need to use really kicky, sweet bombastic words.

But hey, let's share poems. I wrote this one on Valentines day


A Novelty Heart Ring

What could bring more joy
than an idealized fancy;
Sentimentality,
stretched to where its pressure
weakens and whitens
this plastic heart: glued, onto a
child-sized ring, which fits no
adult's hand.
What connotations this toy bears!
How many men have preformed
romance into silly notions,
silly such as this.
Obsessions that seem equally prominent,
consuming of their kitschy minds
-this plastic notion snaps in my
hand from a slightest twinge,
the ring rips up from its hollow
back-
Self discovery prevails such notions,
discoveries just as absurd.
-the broken notion lay in pieces
some steps back where I forgot.
Somewhere.
-On the floor-


Awesome poem my friend. keep up the great work Razz
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