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Love sucks for Joe





lookatme
Here is my story, in 3rd person. It's about me. (I'm Joe)

There once was a guy named Joe. He really liked this cute emo chick. He would try to talk to her, but she would ignore him, because he wasn't apart of her clique. Joe was a preppy, popular type guy. He was crying one day because of something, and she decided to say what was wrong. Then they started talking.
Now he would talk to her everyday about music, love, and hate. They were really good friends, her name was Audrina. He thought he loved her. They went out for 4 days and broke up. Rumours is what broke them up. She heard from another girl Joe was cheating on her.

It's one year later now, and they talk still, they have 1 class together. One day at lunch Joe is bugging her asking "Who do you like" over and over and over, then she mumbled "You." Joe was shoked since now he didn't like her. He said "I don't like you." Then she slapped him, kicked him in the private area and said "I hate you." Joe felt really bad. They still talk now, and Audrina is a lesbian.


Wow, my relationships suck, I've had others that were even more complicated then that. And more painful :[
c'tair
You seem to have gone some "life" missions, if a gamer could name it like that. I mean girls... The thing is, even though we are both homo sapiens, males and females are soooo damn different. The things that separate them are both physiological, like different hormones and therefor instincts, and totally different cultural situation. In relationships, the female is usually the dominant one. Why? Because the tempo of the relationship, and overall the whole thing is up to her. Unless a girl likes you, then its you who dominates. But girls, or atleast the ones here, arent like that and they wont get a crush on you, rather they will play innocent friends, getting to know you before they advance on you. Damn, this is all to complicated for poor me Confused
xkobram
Wow this is a first class story. YOu write realy well about your life. You should write some stories.

Forget this ralationship, find another...
lookatme
xkobram wrote:
Wow this is a first class story. YOu write realy well about your life. You should write some stories.

Forget this ralationship, find another...

Aww thanks :] I write fan fics for my Creative Writing Class.

And I will :]
xkobram
lookatme wrote:

I write fan fics for my Creative Writing Class.


Harry Potter?
How old are you, because I havent heard about "Creative Writing Class" in my school or town.
Captain Fertile
Quick question, I see the term 'emo' mentioned more and more on the internet these days - what does it mean?

Please forgive me for being such an old fart but I still call a club a 'disco' Embarassed
nikki
Captain Fertile wrote:
Quick question, I see the term 'emo' mentioned more and more on the internet these days - what does it mean?

Please forgive me for being such an old fart but I still call a club a 'disco' Embarassed

I had to google it Rolling Eyes

Emo chick
A girl who is into Emo music, likes to wear black and listen to bands like {Taking Back Sunday} and {Thursday}. Commonly stereotyped as cutters and criers, but may not cut and may not cry alot.

Emo
Genre of softcore punk music that integrates unenthusiastic melodramatic 17 year olds who dont smile, high pitched overwrought lyrics and inaudible guitar rifts with tight wool sweaters, tighter jeans, itchy scarfs (even in the summer), ripped chucks with favorite bands signature, black square rimmed glasses, and ebony greasy unwashed hair that is required to cover at least 3/5 ths of the face at an angle.

Taken from, www.urbandictionary.com
calicamper
Sounds like you could have handled that a little bit better, but I consider every interaction where I don't get kicked in the baby maker a good start to a conversation. As for your writing style it looks like a good start. Your tone gives away your bias a little too much for a true 3rd person account and it's kinda choopy, jumps in time and subject without a fully functioning transition. Keep going though, just needs development/expansion.
lookatme
xkobram wrote:
lookatme wrote:

I write fan fics for my Creative Writing Class.


Harry Potter?
How old are you, because I havent heard about "Creative Writing Class" in my school or town.


I am 16 :]
Nope. Instant Star and Degrassi.
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