FRIHOST FORUMS SEARCH FAQ TOS BLOGS COMPETITIONS
You are invited to Log in or Register a free Frihost Account!


Am i ready?





AOP Web Development
Hello everyone!

Im 20 years of age and i have my gf which is 18 years of age.... she told me that she want's us to have a secret marraige but sad to say im not yet ready bec. were too young and besides she still studying... im graduating about this march!

She's already want to have a secret marraige... Well if you ask me if i love her? of course i do but is that the way i can do to show her how much i love her? Smile
twisthigh
That's pretty intense, I'm only 19 and there's no way that I'm ready for marriage, I think you should seriously talk about it with her, and making it a secret would only cause big problems in the family and will eventually take a toll on your relationship, so don't make it a secret.
ashok
no not at all. Talk to her and explain things. Ask her to wait until her studies are completed while you get yourself established. Ask her to respect your views and not to ask for marriage so soon.
Subsonic Sound
If you have doubts, you're not ready. It's as simple as that.

I'd ask her why she wants to get married in secret? If a relationship is stable enough that marriage is even an option, you'll still be together when your studies are finished.
xkobram
Im young to have any tips for U. But i dont wanna get married too young. At least 25-30...
defnet
Eh? Whoaaah!!! Slow your roll....
Marrying in secret, why?
There should be a good reason for it.
And secondly, your finishing up your studies and she is probably still studying.
One student already has a hard time taking care for himself so I guess that it wouldn't be easy if you married right now.
Even if you love her, you should tell her that you can't marry her now because you probably wouldn't be in the ideal position of properly taking care of her.
I don't wanna be running and looking for a job right after my graduation and have a studying wife to take care of.
In most cases a marriage is very good.
But I guess that at this moment in your lives it would do more harm to your relationship than good. Even if the love is sooo real, stress can affect your relationship greatly.

But then again....
What do I know
Silenced
Chris24
I will tell you what I have told my children. Do not get married til you have 1.a job that has benefits (ie, medical, etc) 2. Til you have a decent savings put away. 3. Will be able to support yourself if the marriage doesnt work out. 4. Absolutely know that you are ready for it.

From what it sounds like you are not. Finish Your studies let her finish hers. If then at that time you are still together then discuss marriage. If you really love each other what is the rush. Are you sick or dying of cancer? if not wait til you are completely ready.....
urbanbuddha
Ask her what marriage means to her? She may say something like "love, commitment, faithfulness" and her yearning to be married with you so soon may stem from insecurities about those things. Try to let her know that even if you weren't married yet, you'd still be all of those things for her. Marriage shouldn't be rushed and should be done when both of you are ready.
supjapscrapper
buddy ..... get your studies finished, get a job or start a career, be ready to offer the person you love the best you can ... stop being so intensively and passionately idiot, so that you even consider marrying her without knowing if you REALLY are in love ... your are 20 maan... come on,

On the other hand...I don't know you nor her, neither can I evaluate your feelings, but if you are in this extremely tiny probability of being in love with her .... that she is right man, but then gather your pride and no secret things, you are no children and shouldn't act as ones if you want to be maried, apart from if her father will kill her if she marries publicly, but I honestly see no reason for that if he's not crazy ... Very Happy
good luck!!
blue77
For me you both are to young to get married.
You are not finished your development as a personalities yet and in my oppinion you have a little of personal experience.
In this years young people want to do many things and not to take much responsibilities.
Many people don't have stable job or opportunities for gaining enough money.
There are to many problems to solve if you get married. And, in my oppinion is better if you do not do it at this time.
rainmaker
I think the real question you need to be asking first is if you are ready. I have seen too many marriages disintegrate for the simple reason that things "didn't work out." Now, my opinion is biased because my parents recently went through this, and it was a nasty ordeal. I guess the point is that marriage is a mutual and (in theory) a lifelong thing. To that end, BOTH of you should be completely prepared before tying the knot.

I am by no means a marriage counselor or expert, but this just comes from my own observations. Take it for what it's worth, and good luck!

--rainmaker
peaceninja
go have a "secret honeymoon" instead, its romantic yet mysteriously evasive.
tingkagol
AOP Web Development wrote:
Hello everyone!

Im 20 years of age and i have my gf which is 18 years of age.... she told me that she want's us to have a secret marraige but sad to say im not yet ready bec. were too young and besides she still studying... im graduating about this march!

She's already want to have a secret marraige... Well if you ask me if i love her? of course i do but is that the way i can do to show her how much i love her? Smile

one big NO. and juvenile irresponsibility is never a way of showing your love for her.
Related topics
Rails
server with ready PHP
Adsense Ready Websites! 150 Fully Built sites!
Auto-SE Ready
In 30 years 20% muslims in Europe. Is Europe ready?
PS3: Are you ready for it?
READY.GOV
Is Frihost Digg-ready?
Are You Ready For Some Football?
www.0urnet.com is ready
Supernatural the CW hit is now an unoffical RPG
US ready to send troops to Pakistan for joint activities
Put A Banner For 1 Month In My Sig for 100 Frih$
Your Daily Inspiration Is Up and Ready
Reply to topic    Frihost Forum Index -> Lifestyle and News -> Relationships

FRIHOST HOME | FAQ | TOS | ABOUT US | CONTACT US | SITE MAP
© 2005-2011 Frihost, forums powered by phpBB.