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Self esteem in relation to relationships

Self esteem in relation to relationships

In psychology, self-esteem or self-worth includes a person's subjective appraisal of himself or herself as intrinsically positive or negative to some degree.

I have done some reading on how your self esteem affects your relationships and happiness.

Self-esteem involves both self-relevant beliefs (e.g., "I am competent/incompetent", "I am liked/disliked") and associated self-relevant emotions (e.g., triumph/despair, pride/shame). It also finds expression in behaviour (e.g., assertiveness/timorousness, confidence/caution). In addition, self-esteem can be construed as an enduring personality characteristic (trait self-esteem) or as a temporary psychological condition (state self-esteem). Finally, self-esteem can be specific to a particular dimension (e.g., "I believe I am a good writer, and feel proud of that in particular") or global in extent (e.g., "I believe I am a good person, and feel proud of myself in general").

As you can see there are many dimensions of self esteem. I think the most important aspect of self esteem that affects your relationships is what you think of yourself. Am I good enough or not.

What makes good relationships? Simply: I am good enough. I am good enough to get this kind of attention. I am good enough to not let you handle me in this way. I am good enough to show you the respect that you deserve and to get the respect that I reserve.

See this is all to it. If you are not good enough low self esteem, not any of your relationships will be of any good. So start working on that self esteem to get more out of your relationships and life.
Right........ Shocked
That's some wonder advice, but sometimes it's easier to say than do. If it were so easy, people wouldn't be stuck in bad relationships.
Citizen Kane
Too easy. to a great extend this is true. But then again,... there's more to it, it's much more complex. people also have to take in account the experiences they had. These experiences form people in a way that they behave accordingly to them. A big part of these experiences is how people are brought up. Read theories from Nagy and theories about systems about this. (The experiences people have had are the reasons why people with great self esteem get stuck in bad relationships Wink )

So it's not just about having a good self esteem.
You forgot about self-concept. It is especially important in relationships. Your self-concept is how you view others opinion of yourself. This is what destroys people or build people up. Relationships fall apart not b/c a person does not like themselves, but b/c they preceive that their partner has a negative view of them
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