FRIHOST ē FORUMS ē SEARCH ē FAQ ē TOS ē BLOGS ē COMPETITIONS
You are invited to Log in or Register a free Frihost Account!


The hardest thing





Gundamxxg
is when you have so much love and devotion to give to one person, but that one person is never there to get what you have to give.

Sometimes being single is fun, then at times it gets boring. I am one of those people that have been completely bored of being single and dont know how to end it. I dont know if its something that I do around people that makes me not feel wanted or if it's just how things are.

Any advice on what I should do. Please be serious.
imera
It can be hard being single, also lonely and boring.

Quote:
I donít know if itís something that I do around people that makes me not feel wanted or if itís just how things are.

I never had any luck with friends when I was younger, most people would make fun of me. Because of that I became a quiet girl, was mostly by my self.

That has changed this year, I moved away from my hometown so I could study. I knew nobody there, which was my biggest challenge. I started meeting people and got some good friends.

What I wanted to point out is that it does not matter how you are, some people will hate you just because you are around them, it is so cruel of them. And people that you thought were youíre friends is not as good friends as you can think.

Go out and meet new people, if you donít find anyone that suits you then donít stop looking. And donít look for the perfect, most people make that mistake, but not even they are perfect so itís just stupid.

Try to find some good friends that you can hang out with, maybe they can give you some good advice, and help you.

Hope this helps
discountcontacts
The title says it all. The way you behave is a direct function of how people treat you. Read up all the free self help guides available on the net. But before you do that- pleassssssseeee develop a critical mind first.

Critical+Creative+Ambition= Success.
Gundamxxg
Yeah thats most likely my problem, im more critical to the ones/things around me. I have tons of ambitions, and im insanely creative, thats one of the reasons I attend an art school. And now that I have heard it from someone who doesnt even know me, it just makes it stand out that much more. It's true I never really am critical of myself, and a background to go with it. Fluctuations in personallity are fun lol.
discountcontacts
No. Your biggest problem is you don't listen. You hear (read in this case) what you want to hear. I said develop a "critical mind"- that does not mean a "criticizing mind", it means a mind with the ability to make wise judgement, one that is able to decide what is truth and what is bs. After developing a critical mind, you then go out and learn. Recommended reading:

Dale Carnegie's "How to win friends and influence people"

After that, you apply.

P.S. I don't listen either, but at least i know my flaw. Next time, please write clearly. I struggled to understand what you mean by fluctuating personality and you failed to clarify on why its fun. Its annoying when you talk to someone and it seems like they are using you for emotional release, rather than genuinely communicating with you.
Gundamxxg
First, its not that I hear what I want to hear, its that I misunderstood what you were trying to say, and thus came with a response to what I thought you were talking about. And second, I dont appreciate it when people judge me by text I write. It's a total different story if you know who I am in person, and now that what you had said prior is clear to me I understand what you are saying, and I do have a critical mind, I do apply myself to everything, I do have friends, I have had relationships, I was just expressing the matter of how hard it is to find, whether it be a long and daunting task or it be a matter of high standards or whatever you wish to think it as, someone you can care about, and be able to understand and unite as one.

I've gone through ups and downs of two meaningful long relationships, in which both I thought everything was ok. I was loyal and affectionate, I showed my feelings to my partners at that time. And now I don't have that. It was merely me posting of what kind of thing I am going through, and if anyone had any advice on what to do.

So just one thing I ask you, please do not judge me from a few words that I type, they, alone, do not convey emotion and can be easily misunderstood.
discountcontacts
Thats ok I understand. Ur just trying to defend your self-esteem. Its a natural instinct. I am not trying to make any offensive statements. I am merely stating what I thought was the truth.
jcvincent
First, you just have to show them the true you. They'll never like you as long as they don't see the true you. Always remember that in a relationship, acceptance must come first. So if they accept you just the way you are, you are heading for a very good relationship.

By the way. Don't be bored of being single. Because if you are just looking for a girl friend just because you are bored of being single, they i suggest you just look for a friend. Not a girl friend.

Please. If you have a girl friend. Don't treat her as a property. Because no one is not a property of anyone.

Good Luck!

Stay cool!
hsadmin
Gundamxxg wrote:
is when you have so much love and devotion to give to one person, but that one person is never there to get what you have to give.

Sometimes being single is fun, then at times it gets boring. I am one of those people that have been completely bored of being single and dont know how to end it. I dont know if its something that I do around people that makes me not feel wanted or if it's just how things are.

Any advice on what I should do. Please be serious.


I would say, don't go for just good looking ones, I mean, okay, it's nice to have a hot boy/girl friend, but, find someone that you MAY be a little intrested in, find out what they like to do, ect.. ect.. it's not about looks. Look for presonality. I've met some kinda ugly people, that were great. Hope this helps
redace
Try to life in the society, try to get between people. If you are alone there must be at least one person in the same situation.
ppalayo
Quote:
I am one of those people that have been completely bored of being single and dont know how to end it.

I Know what you mean, I was a long time alone and I'm alone again but I'm looking for a girl who can make me feel special.
You have to go out with girls (as friends) or go on dates. There will be lots of girls who will want to be with you but some won't be for you. Be patient and you will find somebody special.
Wink
Trapper
I think the main thing is you have to love being single and then all of a sudden you'll be a magnet to others. If you are searching too hard or showing too much that you need a woman, that's the last thing that's appealing to the girls.

they like guys that are sure of themselves and not somone who is just looking to hitch up.

The first start is to at least ACT like you appreciate being single. Then when you get a babe, don't just fall head over heals. Act like you've been there before, and that you appreciate their company, but also that you'd be just find without them too. When you find the right one, both of you will know and it doesn't matter from then on how you act (more or less).

Good Luck.
Gundamxxg
Trapper wrote:
I think the main thing is you have to love being single and then all of a sudden you'll be a magnet to others. If you are searching too hard or showing too much that you need a woman, that's the last thing that's appealing to the girls.

they like guys that are sure of themselves and not somone who is just looking to hitch up.

The first start is to at least ACT like you appreciate being single. Then when you get a babe, don't just fall head over heals. Act like you've been there before, and that you appreciate their company, but also that you'd be just find without them too. When you find the right one, both of you will know and it doesn't matter from then on how you act (more or less).

Good Luck.


lol u know that is probably one of the better things i have heard here, cause u totally pointed out something that i generally do. i can act and feel like i appreciate being single and then a girl comes along and i fall for it, my heart gets shattered and it throws me lower in the hole, feeling like i have to work harder to get out of it. =D thanks for the advice all. if you have anything to add feel free i check this post regularly.
picsite
I can't really tell you how to end it but I can tell you that there are other people out there in your position, including myself. I have heard many people say join groups/clubs/teams and make friends and good friends can at times replace the need for a relationship.
LadySarina
I suggest that you just keep looking.. If the one you select don't want your love, it's just not the right one.

Just keep on looking Wink and be yourself..

Don't change to fit in.. you will find somebody
newlife~
Gundamxxg wrote:
Trapper wrote:
I think the main thing is you have to love being single and then all of a sudden you'll be a magnet to others. If you are searching too hard or showing too much that you need a woman, that's the last thing that's appealing to the girls.

they like guys that are sure of themselves and not somone who is just looking to hitch up.

The first start is to at least ACT like you appreciate being single. Then when you get a babe, don't just fall head over heals. Act like you've been there before, and that you appreciate their company, but also that you'd be just find without them too. When you find the right one, both of you will know and it doesn't matter from then on how you act (more or less).

Good Luck.


lol u know that is probably one of the better things i have heard here, cause u totally pointed out something that i generally do. i can act and feel like i appreciate being single and then a girl comes along and i fall for it, my heart gets shattered and it throws me lower in the hole, feeling like i have to work harder to get out of it. =D thanks for the advice all. if you have anything to add feel free i check this post regularly.


<newlife~T>I agree with most of what Trapper had to say, except for the part about acting. I think it is just important to try and find appreciation for where you are, at this point in your life.

If you're travelling amongst different circles of people, I believe a good focus for you would be to see how your ... interests/passions/inner truth ... can be further expressed and reflected within those circles of people--and at the same time, I'd try as hard as I could not to think about who (in those circles) might be your next relationship.

I am totally biased against looking for a relationship--unless it is looking for a better relationship with yourself (finding your passion, uncovering your spirituality, seeking support to sort out your issues).

Your last line contains a lot of wisdom: "i can act and feel like i appreciate being single and then a girl comes along and i fall for it, my heart gets shattered and it throws me lower in the hole" ... you not only fell for the girl, but the girl fell for your act--which (I imagine) wasn't the expression of your entire authentic self. Manipulation (even on that tiny level) is risking the intimacy you seem to be wanting.

Finally, I think you have a lot of courage to put yourself out here like this ... best wishes on working through this situation--peace and blessings.
Related topics
phpBB 2.0.16 released
What are you studying or what's your profession?
What song makes you sad?
Want to know if LOVE is real?
I love you, goodbye
programming
Suicidal Tendencies
Anyone make their own RPGs?
Yet another Heart problem...
sms jokes
sms jokes
Talk about your children...
VANiLLA FLAVA >>> Taste GiveAway
What to do when you need download free software?
I Am Gay ...
Reply to topic    Frihost Forum Index -> Lifestyle and News -> Relationships

FRIHOST HOME | FAQ | TOS | ABOUT US | CONTACT US | SITE MAP
© 2005-2011 Frihost, forums powered by phpBB.