So I'm dating someone who is kind, reasonably attractive, generous, civic minded, pleasant, happy, willing to try new things and has a reasonably interesting and well-paying job. I, of course, am not feeling any spark with this great person.
I'm amazed at how my friends are evenly divided on what I should do. Half say:
"The infatuation wears off anyway. Arranged marriages work in other countries. This is a compatible person for you and you need to grab it."
The other half say:
"You know right away if it's right. Don't toruture yourself. Move on"
What do others think?
If i would be you I would not start an relationship with this girl. I rather live happy with someone who I really can feel that "this is right!". In the long run this will be the best, I think. Or it will at least be the happiest relationsship.
Love from sweden!
I've been on both sides of this ugly stick. First, I dated the girl of my dreams and it unraveled when I wasn't looking. Then I dated the exact opposite... the most reliable dependable girl in the entire world (who happened to see me as the most exciting scientific discovery since the automatic breadmaker).... but I just didn't feel the spark with her.
Overall, though, as long as they are happy with you and as long as they doesn't cause you grief or problems, see where you two end up. People can change gradually over time for better or worse.
Also, how old are you two? Younger people have a tendency to change more quickly than older people.
Disclaimer: The order of my ex's and current relationships to them probably play a large roll in the above stated opinion.
you cant be with someone if you dont feel a spark. cuz your going to want to feel that spark. there must always be something there. your interest in her JOB will fade or whatever. If there is no spark at all, find someone that you could be completely happy with. no joke.
I personally feel you need to take the opportunity if you see it.
The spark may not necessarily come first, however you could find it in the person that is compatible with you.
After all if it doesn't feel right you can always remain friends. If you don't do it you never know what could have happened. You have nothing to lose!
Very good suggestion by HoboPelican.
If anyone thinks that a Spark is the yard stick to measure a relationshp, do give a thought to the Millions of arranged marriages across Asia. They just meet all of a sudden for their marriage but most of them end up quite happily married. Where does the Spark come for them? I guess it comes after marriage.
That is not to say that you should marry a person hoping that the Spark will come later. Once you are mature enough you will realise if a particular person will make a good wife for yourself and whether you two can be happy together.
Meanwhile you can be friends, take time to get close and share your life and see what happens.