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An Exam I Wrote In Another Class [Not Really A 'Joke']
*****************WARNING*****************
This Is Very Long.
*****************WARNING*****************
Yasir Ahmed
A535557
Professor Romano, Patricia
Humanities – War And Peace
345-102-03
**Before You Read This, Please Note**
This isn’t my class. I randomly walked into my friend’s humanities class and took the same midterm as him. I had no knowledge of what went on in his class before this exam. This was written over a span of approximately 1 ½ hours in the class. The teacher didn’t know I wasn’t a student in her class even when she stopped me before I left. She asked me if I had handed in another assignment, and after a short search through her class list, I confessed that I wasn’t in her class and requested her to correct the exam anyways. She said she would. The reason I have any knowledge about Thomas Hobbes and Jean-Jacques Rousseau is due to my previous humanities course. I’ve always known about Gandhi, but I was also in a course at the same time of this course that was centered on Non-violent protest. The numbers in parentheses are the numbers corresponding to the topic questions. I don’t remember the topic questions, but you can kinda figure it out from the answers I gave. Oh, and all the parentheses in the text are actually arrows pointing into that area of the text as a last minute addition. I’ll scan a copy of the exam if enough people like it, and I’ll do it anyways if they don’t because I want this little gem on my site. That’s all!
**Enjoy**
(1) The critics’ arguments are obviously totally unjustified and unrealistic. You can even go as far as to say it’s rather surreal. Actually, it would be easiest to state that they are pretty much schizophrenic, and that they can be classified as insane. Arguments against war are, at the very best, childish and useless. Everyone knows that war is the solution to everything. Imagine a world without violence. Gandhi couldn’t have managed shit-all because he wouldn’t be able to stand against anything. If he said that non-violence is the answer ‘cause you’re willing to lose everything, then you can’t use it in a world without violence because you can’t lose the most important thing (your life, not your pants). So, on a last note for that subject, war-critics are stupid.
Now, I don’t know what this ‘Contemporary Arms Trade’ is, but it sounds artsy. Anything artsy is great in my books, so kudos to that trade.
This “security dilemma” seems resolvable, or else it would be a “security disaster”. I guess the dilemma is still present, so someone needs to step up and do something about it. By the way, Thanks for reading this so far. I might be wasting your time, but maybe you enjoy a refreshing take on war, death and rotting festering corpses. Anyways, back to this dilemma. There is a bit of mystery to this, because I’m sure that if there wasn’t, it would’ve been mediated or something (by now). The only security dilemma I can think of is the amount of time it takes to get through the airports. Talk about one helluva dilemma.
Now, I know war costs a lot. I mean, we must be talking in what, like, 10’s, 20’s, 100’s of dollars? That’ll make waves in any stock market. The production of all those armaments will damage very important things in our lives, like clouds. Can you imagine how different all our lives would be without clouds? It’s unfathomable! And human costs, above all else, will be terribly devastating. All of those people being sold as slaves to raise money for war? Think of the families, the friends, society itself! Everything would be devastated beyond practical devastation, ever recorded in the history of devastating devastation (that devastates). But it must be alright in the end, because Canadians are still up and about… Too bad for the Americans though. Once a mighty nation, now filled with overweight white slaves. OH, the humanity! Woe, I say, WOE. My opinion on this is terrible, and should be censored. You should thank me for thinking of all the children who’ve already been exposed to countless sex scenes, murders, crimes and car-chases. Those poor innocent children…
(3) Six assumptions on the realist world view. Well then, this shouldn’t be too hard, they’re merely assumptions. I assume that those silly realists are living in their own nice little cozy world. They think up fantastical ideas and have no connection whatsoever to reality. Ok, that’s two so far. They imagine that everything is a “thing”, but it isn’t because nothing is a “thing”. Two things can’t be the same “thing”. It’s just not logically ept. Realists believe that everything is positive and happy, that we’ll all end up with bunnies and chocolate, but that’s cause they’re silly, perhaps slightly uneducated. Realists find nothing wrong with how the world is going, and nothing needs to be changed. Hell, according to my assumption of me according to them: we’re all completely aware and living in a veritable (not vegetable) Utopia. Finally, I assume Darth Vader was actually a good guy from beginning to end, and that damn Sith Lord was keeping him looking evil by giving him sexual favours.
Damn You Dark Lord Sith Guy!!!!
This crazy Darth Vader perspective reflects those two cool philosophical guy’s texts because firstly, I don’t know who Thucydid-thing is, and thirdly, Hobbes things that we’re all savages. And that’s exactly what I assume Darth Vader is. A damn Savage.
[The next 5 lines were scribbled over in ink and are just readable]
I’ll go
I think that
That General Guy was on to some
Athen’s had a really annoying General who
I sure wish I had some white out.
Power is more important than justice. If you have power, then you can totally just crush that stupid scale-thingy in your fist. Weigh THAT. So, yes, power is most definitely more important than justice. Now, if justice had a giant submachine gun as a symbol, then I’d argue that that Athenian General had no IDEA what he was talking about, but I can’t argue in Greek. Also, he might kill me. I’m sure glad I don’t have a weak alliance with him. We’re just friendly strongly opinionated enemies.
Good old Hobbes is so certain that we as humans are all evil savages deep inside, and I won’t disagree with him. But he is wrong. I much prefer Rousseau’s thoughts on it. He thinks we’re like furry happy secluded folk. I’d rather be furry than furious, and I’d much rather be wuvable than warring.
Supreme authority? Since when was God not supreme authority. Pft, idiots. There is no necessity of a supreme authority because it’s always there anyways. Hobbes was totally retarded. If someone took something, I wouldn’t be all up in his face spitting profanities. That’s just rude.
Should I asses the world view of Thomas or of realists. Cause Thomas was just a jerk who should have been hanged, while realists are just the gentle retards of the world. Assessed!
[Back of page]
Thank you for bearing with me. I’d like to pick this up after you give me a grade.
I’ll have my fingers crossed for a 90!
-Yazz
[Front of page]
Not in my class.
0%
Last edited by Yazz on Tue May 16, 2006 10:25 pm; edited 4 times in total
This Is Very Long.
*****************WARNING*****************
Yasir Ahmed
A535557
Professor Romano, Patricia
Humanities – War And Peace
345-102-03
**Before You Read This, Please Note**
This isn’t my class. I randomly walked into my friend’s humanities class and took the same midterm as him. I had no knowledge of what went on in his class before this exam. This was written over a span of approximately 1 ½ hours in the class. The teacher didn’t know I wasn’t a student in her class even when she stopped me before I left. She asked me if I had handed in another assignment, and after a short search through her class list, I confessed that I wasn’t in her class and requested her to correct the exam anyways. She said she would. The reason I have any knowledge about Thomas Hobbes and Jean-Jacques Rousseau is due to my previous humanities course. I’ve always known about Gandhi, but I was also in a course at the same time of this course that was centered on Non-violent protest. The numbers in parentheses are the numbers corresponding to the topic questions. I don’t remember the topic questions, but you can kinda figure it out from the answers I gave. Oh, and all the parentheses in the text are actually arrows pointing into that area of the text as a last minute addition. I’ll scan a copy of the exam if enough people like it, and I’ll do it anyways if they don’t because I want this little gem on my site. That’s all!
**Enjoy**
(1) The critics’ arguments are obviously totally unjustified and unrealistic. You can even go as far as to say it’s rather surreal. Actually, it would be easiest to state that they are pretty much schizophrenic, and that they can be classified as insane. Arguments against war are, at the very best, childish and useless. Everyone knows that war is the solution to everything. Imagine a world without violence. Gandhi couldn’t have managed shit-all because he wouldn’t be able to stand against anything. If he said that non-violence is the answer ‘cause you’re willing to lose everything, then you can’t use it in a world without violence because you can’t lose the most important thing (your life, not your pants). So, on a last note for that subject, war-critics are stupid.
Now, I don’t know what this ‘Contemporary Arms Trade’ is, but it sounds artsy. Anything artsy is great in my books, so kudos to that trade.
This “security dilemma” seems resolvable, or else it would be a “security disaster”. I guess the dilemma is still present, so someone needs to step up and do something about it. By the way, Thanks for reading this so far. I might be wasting your time, but maybe you enjoy a refreshing take on war, death and rotting festering corpses. Anyways, back to this dilemma. There is a bit of mystery to this, because I’m sure that if there wasn’t, it would’ve been mediated or something (by now). The only security dilemma I can think of is the amount of time it takes to get through the airports. Talk about one helluva dilemma.
Now, I know war costs a lot. I mean, we must be talking in what, like, 10’s, 20’s, 100’s of dollars? That’ll make waves in any stock market. The production of all those armaments will damage very important things in our lives, like clouds. Can you imagine how different all our lives would be without clouds? It’s unfathomable! And human costs, above all else, will be terribly devastating. All of those people being sold as slaves to raise money for war? Think of the families, the friends, society itself! Everything would be devastated beyond practical devastation, ever recorded in the history of devastating devastation (that devastates). But it must be alright in the end, because Canadians are still up and about… Too bad for the Americans though. Once a mighty nation, now filled with overweight white slaves. OH, the humanity! Woe, I say, WOE. My opinion on this is terrible, and should be censored. You should thank me for thinking of all the children who’ve already been exposed to countless sex scenes, murders, crimes and car-chases. Those poor innocent children…
(3) Six assumptions on the realist world view. Well then, this shouldn’t be too hard, they’re merely assumptions. I assume that those silly realists are living in their own nice little cozy world. They think up fantastical ideas and have no connection whatsoever to reality. Ok, that’s two so far. They imagine that everything is a “thing”, but it isn’t because nothing is a “thing”. Two things can’t be the same “thing”. It’s just not logically ept. Realists believe that everything is positive and happy, that we’ll all end up with bunnies and chocolate, but that’s cause they’re silly, perhaps slightly uneducated. Realists find nothing wrong with how the world is going, and nothing needs to be changed. Hell, according to my assumption of me according to them: we’re all completely aware and living in a veritable (not vegetable) Utopia. Finally, I assume Darth Vader was actually a good guy from beginning to end, and that damn Sith Lord was keeping him looking evil by giving him sexual favours.
Damn You Dark Lord Sith Guy!!!!
This crazy Darth Vader perspective reflects those two cool philosophical guy’s texts because firstly, I don’t know who Thucydid-thing is, and thirdly, Hobbes things that we’re all savages. And that’s exactly what I assume Darth Vader is. A damn Savage.
[The next 5 lines were scribbled over in ink and are just readable]
I’ll go
I think that
That General Guy was on to some
Athen’s had a really annoying General who
I sure wish I had some white out.
Power is more important than justice. If you have power, then you can totally just crush that stupid scale-thingy in your fist. Weigh THAT. So, yes, power is most definitely more important than justice. Now, if justice had a giant submachine gun as a symbol, then I’d argue that that Athenian General had no IDEA what he was talking about, but I can’t argue in Greek. Also, he might kill me. I’m sure glad I don’t have a weak alliance with him. We’re just friendly strongly opinionated enemies.
Good old Hobbes is so certain that we as humans are all evil savages deep inside, and I won’t disagree with him. But he is wrong. I much prefer Rousseau’s thoughts on it. He thinks we’re like furry happy secluded folk. I’d rather be furry than furious, and I’d much rather be wuvable than warring.
Supreme authority? Since when was God not supreme authority. Pft, idiots. There is no necessity of a supreme authority because it’s always there anyways. Hobbes was totally retarded. If someone took something, I wouldn’t be all up in his face spitting profanities. That’s just rude.
Should I asses the world view of Thomas or of realists. Cause Thomas was just a jerk who should have been hanged, while realists are just the gentle retards of the world. Assessed!
[Back of page]
Thank you for bearing with me. I’d like to pick this up after you give me a grade.
I’ll have my fingers crossed for a 90!
-Yazz
[Front of page]
Not in my class.
0%
Last edited by Yazz on Tue May 16, 2006 10:25 pm; edited 4 times in total
HAHA i would love to see you get like a 100. 
If you get a higher grade then someone else then maybe it shows you are really smart. It was long but i read the whole thing?
If you get a higher grade then someone else then maybe it shows you are really smart. It was long but i read the whole thing?lol, at the very end I wrote
She had corrected it and I got 0% on it. lol.
| Yazz wrote: |
| [Front of page]
Not in my class. 0% |
She had corrected it and I got 0% on it. lol.
Cyrus
| Yazz wrote: | ||
lol, at the very end I wrote
She had corrected it and I got 0% on it. lol. |
That was a bit unfair don't you think
i think it was unfair,
she should have wrote
NOT IN MY CLASS
0% (but if you were: #%)
or at least told you that you were at least on track, and knew stuff
and i think it is kinda funny, i mean you spent an hour and a half for what??
(definately not a grade)
she should have wrote
NOT IN MY CLASS
0% (but if you were: #%)
or at least told you that you were at least on track, and knew stuff
and i think it is kinda funny, i mean you spent an hour and a half for what??
(definately not a grade)
Shows what you do when you are bored. 
You probley got a 0 because you wern't in her class.
You probley got a 0 because you wern't in her class. Haha, I appreciate that you think this was worth a mark, but it seriously wasn't, lol.
The reason she wrote 'Not in my class' was so she didn't mix my exam with everyone else's. I honestly earned that 0% with my 1 1/2 hours of slight effort (I hate writing by hand, so I'm amazed I wrote this much).
Anyways, all the stuff I wrote was either irrelevant or was the complete opposite of what I thought would be the right answer. Whenever I do a test in my friend's classes, I always make it funny. I have another test I wrote in my other friend's Cinematography class. I'll make a transcript of that as well, but it's not in essay format.
The reason she wrote 'Not in my class' was so she didn't mix my exam with everyone else's. I honestly earned that 0% with my 1 1/2 hours of slight effort (I hate writing by hand, so I'm amazed I wrote this much).
Anyways, all the stuff I wrote was either irrelevant or was the complete opposite of what I thought would be the right answer. Whenever I do a test in my friend's classes, I always make it funny. I have another test I wrote in my other friend's Cinematography class. I'll make a transcript of that as well, but it's not in essay format.
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