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LINUX was made solely to violate American copyright!





Animal
Ok. I'm not being serious... But I know someone who is!
source

You need to read this - a real person really believes that the sole purpose of Linux is to bypass American copyrights. The article is absolutely hilarious and you really should read it. It's pretty long, so I've quoted my favourites below... enjoy! Laughing

Shelly The Republican wrote:
Like all the greatest American engineering, it's an example of innovation that makes a growing group of European and Chinese hackers jealous. They hate our lead in computing technology and will stop at nothing until they have control of all of our computers.

I'm talking about a project called 'Linux', something you may not have encountered, but might do some day.
It's a computer program that was initially developed in Finland as a means of circumventing valuable copyrights and patents owned by an American company called SCO Group.


Shelly The Republican wrote:
The American software industry is worth more than $7 Billion; Introducing a foreign product like Linux which is often copied for free could threaten that entire industry. A generation of computer users might get use to accepting foreign software hand-outs rather than paying for a superior American products. If only the danger were just to our economy:


Shelly The Republican wrote:
guess what software Osama Bin Laden uses on his laptop?

If you guessed it was Linux you would be 100% right. Osama uses Linux because he knows designed to counterfit DVDs, curcumventing the Digital Millenium Copyright Act, and defraud companies like Disney.


That's right folks, you heard it here first! Osama Bin Laden is evil - he uses Linux and bypasses copyright on American DVDs Shocked

Shelly The Republican wrote:
If one of your friends is using Linux or may be tempted to try it show them this article. Explain that Linux is a genuine threat and that by using it they may be opening their computer to Chinese hackers.

If you see a company using Linux, it may be that they have not paid for this software. Report them to the Business Software Alliance who have the legal authority to inspect any company's computers for illegal programs like Linux.


So, my Linux-using friends. Are you convinced yet? Laughing

If you read the whole story, you'll see that someone pointed out that Shelly's website is hosted on a Linux server. Like Frihost. I've always said Bondings was evil Twisted Evil

And before I get any complaints, I don't agree with Shelly the Republican. I think she's crazy, but very very very funny!
dz9c
Laughing Nice find Laughing
Blaster
I love the part about osama. I found it to be extreamly funny. The whole thing is funny. I told you ocalhoun linux is evil. HAHA Very Happy
[FuN]goku
OMFGZZOR????!!!!! Now Thats Funny! I mean... you know your screwed in the head when xD Laughing
{name here}
Laughing That was good! Here's another funny article that actually seems serious: Is your son a computer hacker?
Quote:
2. Are you finding programs on your computer that you don't remember installing?

Your son will probably try to install some hacker software. He may attempt to conceal the presence of the software in some way, but you can usually find any new programs by reading through the programs listed under "Install/Remove Programs" in your control panel. Popular hacker software includes "Comet Cursor", "Bonzi Buddy" and "Flash".
alkady
Hahahaha, Osama Bin Laden has a laptop, That is just funny, Where is he going to plug the adapter in his cave?

And it's just funny to picture osama using a laptop? Can anyone else picture it?
Blaster
They have full electic in caves up there. It is where they live up there. I could picture him up there like being here on frihost and stuff. How funny would that be? He registerd on DDS so that just shows it is true. So linux is evil. haha. Very Happy
Donutey
If you go down to the footer, and click meaning and purpose you get this
Quote:

ShelleyTheRepublican.com is a satirical entertainment web site. "Shelley"* and her friends are fictional characters (*created 1999). Shelley's opinions are an amalgam of many of the right-wing pundits who are frequently featured on conservative TV and talk-radio.

Shelley's views are outrageous, offensive and wrong, but no more so than the right-wing pundits that saturate our media. The purpose of this website is to point out how utterly absurd these right-wing views are. The fact that you had a lingering doubt that she was "for real" meant that you too agree that Shelley's opinions reflect what some Republicans actually believe.

Naturally, Shelley is an exaggeration. No single Republican combines the religious mania of Pat Robertson, the brazen menace of Sean Hannity and the hysterical nonsense of Anne Coulter. Shelley is all of these people and more. The fact that you dislike Shelley means that there is hope for us all.

It's safe to say that almost all information in all of the articles on this site is false. The web site is designed to be funny. We hope it made some of you laugh.

If you don't find it funny, we kindly ask you to leave. If you don't want to leave, we beg you not to ruin the joke for others. If we have upset you we are truly sorry. Despite what Shelly might say, we truly appreciate your comments. Every one of you who commented on the site, you made our day. Thanks. We really mean it!

And now our final thought; Anybody can shoot down an utterly preposterous argument. We believe that it takes a great deal more rhetorical alacrity to argue for something that is blatantly insane. A child could find the flaws in Shelley's arguments and most teenagers have a better grasp on reality than that fool Tristan.

Imagine what it must have been like to be Scott Mcellan, GW's former press secretary. Like many Americans, I enjoyed watching Scotty squirm on that podium. Just like Scotty, we are working hard to keep you entertained (although we can not always comment because there are ongoing legal proceedings).


Otherwise, if you hadn't noticed, it's satire. Rolling Eyes took me a second before I realized it lol.
Kaisonic
Hm...I've never really used Linux, and I seem to be getting around American DVD Copyrights just fine on my Windows....

I mean...did I say that out loud?
dz9c
Kaisonic wrote:
Hm...I've never really used Linux, and I seem to be getting around American DVD Copyrights just fine on my Windows....

I mean...did I say that out loud?

Whispers: Heyyy can you hook me up with some movies? Razz
Nah its all good.
@blaster about osama: Good one. Another nice find Laughing
squirrelmaster
DANG, goog thing that article was a joke,otherwise Shelly and Tristan are COMPLETE idiots!!!
Linux evill?? i laugh at the thought of it!! Laughing

and {name here}, that article on if you son is a hacker is HILARIOUS, i sure hope it was fake,
otherwise i feel sorry for the kid, i bet all he was doing was playing flashgames online Laughing
good thing my dad has a computer business, otherwise he might think i was a hacker, i mean i have LINUX, on a 2nd HDD.
that, and i asked him to move from AOL dial-up to SBC YAHOO dsl.
(good thing he wanted to move too)

how the complete morons out there that believe this stuff is beyond me Rolling Eyes
psycosquirrel
Laughing That article is rediculous...
Animal
Donutey wrote:
If you go down to the footer, and click meaning and purpose you get this

Otherwise, if you hadn't noticed, it's satire. Rolling Eyes took me a second before I realized it lol.


Yeah, I found that too. But it made it a bit less funny.
deltaserver
lmao good find XD Cool
iridios
I was about to comment on how If Linux was made to violate copyright then MS Windows is blatant Grand Theft OS! Glad I took a little bit of time to check out the site.

Good laugh tho' Smile
L0pht
LOL
Some peaple just have too much free time... Beside that, Linux has great power tools that I wouldn't be surprised that it could actually do much more hehe.
OMG Osama and Linux? geeeez :O
alkady
Blaster wrote:
They have full electic in caves up there. It is where they live up there. I could picture him up there like being here on frihost and stuff. How funny would that be? He registerd on DDS so that just shows it is true. So linux is evil. haha. Very Happy


I'm betting I'm the next one on Osama's list, Just for the joke.
riv
Donutey wrote:
If you go down to the footer, and click meaning and purpose you get this
Quote:

ShelleyTheRepublican.com is a satirical entertainment web site. "Shelley"* and her friends are fictional characters (*created 1999). Shelley's opinions are an amalgam of many of the right-wing pundits who are frequently featured on conservative TV and talk-radio.

Shelley's views are outrageous, offensive and wrong, but no more so than the right-wing pundits that saturate our media. The purpose of this website is to point out how utterly absurd these right-wing views are. The fact that you had a lingering doubt that she was "for real" meant that you too agree that Shelley's opinions reflect what some Republicans actually believe.

Naturally, Shelley is an exaggeration. No single Republican combines the religious mania of Pat Robertson, the brazen menace of Sean Hannity and the hysterical nonsense of Anne Coulter. Shelley is all of these people and more. The fact that you dislike Shelley means that there is hope for us all.

It's safe to say that almost all information in all of the articles on this site is false. The web site is designed to be funny. We hope it made some of you laugh.

If you don't find it funny, we kindly ask you to leave. If you don't want to leave, we beg you not to ruin the joke for others. If we have upset you we are truly sorry. Despite what Shelly might say, we truly appreciate your comments. Every one of you who commented on the site, you made our day. Thanks. We really mean it!

And now our final thought; Anybody can shoot down an utterly preposterous argument. We believe that it takes a great deal more rhetorical alacrity to argue for something that is blatantly insane. A child could find the flaws in Shelley's arguments and most teenagers have a better grasp on reality than that fool Tristan.

Imagine what it must have been like to be Scott Mcellan, GW's former press secretary. Like many Americans, I enjoyed watching Scotty squirm on that podium. Just like Scotty, we are working hard to keep you entertained (although we can not always comment because there are ongoing legal proceedings).


Otherwise, if you hadn't noticed, it's satire. Rolling Eyes took me a second before I realized it lol.

Actually, you click the "Terms and Conditions" link which I guess has the "Meaning and Pourpose."

Another funny expert from the site:
Quote:
This truly uncompelling start contrasts profoundly with the Windows installation experience. There was no need to download a web-browser for Windows (Microsoft thoughtfully decided to integrate one with their operating system), so instead we downloaded a small shareware productivity utility called "Bonzi Buddy"?.

...

The installation couldn't have been simpler; The install icon appeared on my desk. All I had to do to install the program was double-click on it. There were no additional passwords to type in and as an additional courtesy to users, Windows installers often include extra programs that might be of interest.

For example, my download included Claria, and Comet-Cursor. A review of these utilities is outside the scope of this article, nonetheless it was gratifying that the makers of Windows software have the freedom to innovate.

...

Now what can we say of the Windows browsing experience? Many of you will be familiar with Internet explorer. Millions of Americans have grown accustomed to it's ease of use, slick presentation and universal compatibility;

The last part was halirious for me, with the hours I spent making layouts work for IE...

Oh, and one last word, I feel sorry for the people who agree with Shelly and Tristan in the comments... Which just shows that there are people with either senses of humor, or great ignorance.

By the way, this post was written in Safari, which runs in Mac OS X, on an iBook, dual-booting Linux. I also am in Canada. Laughing
Vrythramax
No Comment, except to say that I can write an install program that doesn't show in the "Add/Remove" Programs list, or in your Start Menu, and that Linux is not evil...in any way.
Donutey
riv wrote:

Actually, you click the "Terms and Conditions" link which I guess has the "Meaning and Pourpose."


That was just changed between yesterday and today, they buried the disclaimer a little deeper lol.
avk
Didn't know that Osama knows to use Computers.
he should have been happy with guns and bomb's
Computer is not for him

However.. Good story and lots of new knowledge
Ray Gravin
If good and evil are subjective, then for the money mongering companies who develop software commercially... Linux is in fact "evil"

Now from my perspective it is "good" becouse it embodies the spirit of human inovation unhindered by greed. It can grow much easier through the contrabution of anyone inclined enough to contribute. If we as a species took up the spirit of this idea we could be a far more advanced society. Of course this is coming from someone with some pretty far out ideas concerning the evils of capitalism.

... anyone else feel that linux is also incredably punk rock : )
Lied
Thank good US is far far away from EU.

I am gonna soon copyright the 10 and the 01. SO be carefull when you complile your home made programe cause you must pay me a license! Razz

[/Sarcasm off]

Recently the EU had presed to agree on accepting software paterns from the US. Thank god we did not agree.Us seems not to understand that Internet and computers are far away from thier hands and cannot gain money or control it nowadays.
ltbennett
i like the quotes but osama binlarden uses linux Question where in hell did they get that infomation i always thoght he used microsoft 2 screw whith bill gates a bit i think these r a bit silly dont u think considering that they r talking about allogations against linux whos sole task is to take the mick out of micosoft constanty i not saying i dont agree but it is taking it a bit far dont u think?
goutha
Conspiration theory will always find adpets.

I don't think that Linus was thinking about the US when he started programming Linux. He was just thinking about a good operation system that will be flexible and respond to his needs...

For those who want to find other reasons... you can always try Smile
bluedragon
Absolutely hilarious. I will send it to my mother and siblings who always thought I screwed up our family computer somehow when in fact I am the technology wiz of them all.
sibbahz
I highly doubt this was the only reason for making linux.
Windows can also be used to commit piracy and for breaking copyright, so why put all that effort into producing a new operating system that supports most of the hardware out there and making it easy for the end users to get it?
Funny idea for an article though.
tony
hahaha! this is an awesome satire! i will definately send the url to all my linux friends.
Jack_jan
Linux is immense, basically non-hackable! what a stupid person, lots of high quality and usefull websites are run on a database from linux..
silvermesh
let the hilarity ensue..

I dunno whats more comical, the satire itself, or peoples reactions to it.
bdoneck
I'm not too sure but I don't think he is being serious either, the type of arguments he uses show that he is either 3 years old, or not being serious.

But anyways, anyone that believes that Linux is worse than microsoft really needs to not use technology.
jongoldsz
I am sorry to break this to you, but the original purpose of Linux was a project done by a college student know by the name of Linus.
tony
I am VERY relieved to find the linux blog is a satire. look at the second to the last post on this page...

http://groups.google.com/group/u-s-a/browse_thread/thread/81b693073d67dce9/a7f65064f1c48694#a7f65064f1c48694
Davidgr1200
"Explain that Linux is a genuine threat and that by using it they may be opening their computer to Chinese hackers. "

But those hackers will only be destroying Linux, not Microsoft products, so that should be Ok then?

David
Boles Roor
Ehm, I "kinda" read the whole topic and read it was satiric, but... I thought Linux was made by Linus Thorvald, a Swede or something like that? Or is it just part of the show, and I'm not getting it? Razz
nilsmo
This was hilarious! Laughing Remember, unfortunately money=power.
snowboardalliance
I was thinkin like, no way is this serious. Lol that was funny though

Quote:
God knows what you would use to send a fax or make a website. You cannot even get Front Page for Linux.
jongoldsz
From all the OSs in the world, Linux is probably the safest one.

EX:
1) The FAA manages air trafic with Linux: http://www.fcw.com/article94234-05-01-06
2) SpaceX Falcon 1 runs linux: http://www.linuxjournal.com/article/8057
3) Linux is run on most web servers.
Hogwarts
Well. That's original. Still, I do think it's (No offense) normal that Americans refuse to accept anything they didn't ask for.

Americans are so ... American! Still, as an Australian I find offense when people ask about "Putting shrimps on the barbie" and us fighting crocodiles and yelling "Aw, crikey!" or whatever else they think we say. We don't. Live with it.
Daniel15
Bah, it doesn't work for me, I get a 404 error Sad

{name here} wrote:
Laughing That was good! Here's another funny article that actually seems serious: Is your son a computer hacker?
Quote:
2. Are you finding programs on your computer that you don't remember installing?

Your son will probably try to install some hacker software. He may attempt to conceal the presence of the software in some way, but you can usually find any new programs by reading through the programs listed under "Install/Remove Programs" in your control panel. Popular hacker software includes "Comet Cursor", "Bonzi Buddy" and "Flash".

Yeah, I remember reading that (a link was actually posted on a MSDN blog). That is a satirical article as well (and hence the author is NOT being serious)

I guess that proves it: Spyware and popular vector-based animation programs are backing software.

Some other funny stuff from that article:
Quote:

Most American families use trusted and responsible Internet Service Providers, such as AOL

AOL? "Trusted" and "responsible"? Laughing Laughing Laughing

Quote:
If your son has requested a new "processor" from a company called "AMD", this is genuine cause for alarm. AMD is a third-world based company who make inferior, "knock-off" copies of American processor chips. They use child labor extensively in their third world sweatshops, and they deliberately disable the security features that American processor makers, such as Intel, use to prevent hacking. AMD chips are never sold in stores, and you will most likely be told that you have to order them from internet sites.


Quote:
If your son spends more than thirty minutes each day on the computer, he may be using it to DOS other peoples sites. DOSing involves gaining access to the "command prompt" on other people's machines, and using it to tie up vital internet services. This can take up to eight hours. If your son is doing this, he is breaking the law, and you should stop him immediately


And this was probably one of the funniest bits:
Quote:

BSD, Lunix, Debian and Mandrake are all versions of an illegal hacker operation system, invented by a Soviet computer hacker named Linyos Torovoltos, before the Russians lost the Cold War. It is based on a program called "xenix", which was written by Microsoft for the US government. These programs are used by hackers to break into other people's computer systems to steal credit card numbers. They may also be used to break into people's stereos to steal their music, using the "mp3" program. Torovoltos is a notorious hacker, responsible for writing many hacker programs, such as "telnet", which is used by hackers to connect to machines on the internet without using a telephone.

Your son may try to install "lunix" on your hard drive. If he is careful, you may not notice its presence, however, lunix is a capricious beast, and if handled incorrectly, your son may damage your computer, and even break it completely by deleting Windows, at which point you will have to have your computer repaired by a professional.

I'm quite sure that deleting windows will do the opposite of completely breaking the computer Razz

And in case anyone doesn't know, "satire" is basically when you poke fun at or ridicule a serious issue
{name here}
jongoldsz wrote:
From all the OSs in the world, Linux is probably the safest one.

EX:
1) The FAA manages air trafic with Linux: http://www.fcw.com/article94234-05-01-06
2) SpaceX Falcon 1 runs linux: http://www.linuxjournal.com/article/8057
3) Linux is run on most web servers.

Not exactly.eComStation can be considered safer than linux because it is based on OS/2, an Operating System that hasn't had a virus, keylogger, or otherwise created for it in over 10 years. OpenBSD, isn't based on linux, but it hasn't had a remote security hole in the default install in over 8 years.
SilverDogg
roflet

please tell me that "is your son a computer hacker" is fake aswell XD.
they are so good these satiric articles ;D
Rmgk
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAAH, how on earth can she find out about osama's OS, and they still cant find him.

Quote:
At 4/22/2006 11:05 PM, rj said...

You guys are just too much! You can't possibly be this ignorant.

1. Windows did not have 'built-in' anti-virus or anti-spyware software in 1998. It still doesn't have 'built-in' anti-virus, and the anti-spyware is in beta. It didn't even have a 'built-in' firewall in 1998, and the present firewall is not one of the best out there (which is why Symantec and McAfee and Zone are doing such good business).

2. Most of the internet runs on Linux. It's generally more stable than Windows, and problems are fixed more quickly.

What a great troll, though.

At 4/23/2006 1:23 AM, Shelley said...

Tristan, I believe you!
This rj guy is probably a typical liberal liar.
Most of the internet is running on linux? Don't make me laugh!!!
I used linux once. It's terrible.
DominickC
Wow, I'm a hacker? All I forgot was the spiky hair. Wink

Just hilarious!
Mamsaac
I wonder if Osama really uses Linux.

I would find it hilarious <_<
01000101
LMAO lol.

thats funny as hell..
the overall view on FREE OS's should be the inverse of that.. people love free stuff, especially something as essential as computer component. she should be thanking the *nix community for creating the linux/unix servers.. because guess what is 99% of the time running on the network ran by that server?... hundreds or more Windows OS computers being drones... so its a win-win.. we get free software, to modify and do as we please with it thats powerfull.. and microsoft gets more sales from big companies who can now manage a larger amount of drones..

" Micro$oft ? hmm.. sounds like a toilet paper? "
Sphaerenkern
That's very fine satire! Thanks! Smile
mwsupra
Quite an old post. Unfortunately the full article is no longer there on that site Sad
Gonzalo
Hahaha I had a laugh like I didn´t have since long ago.

Thumbs up, my friend.
standready
I needed a good laugh today. Thanks!
Agent ME
Odd, I got a page not found error. Though I figured the site was a satire when I looked at some other articles in it; there's "God's Hitlist" which is kind of a funny right-wing spoof.
ankitdatashn
haha thats funny, but I guess these things can be fake too at times, with so much stuff inside Internet these days believing each and every one is difficult. But yes some companies cannot be trusted as they can do anything for money

Any how brother am sorry as I have not read the whole post as it is quite long!
erlendhg
That was hilarious. So Linux is illegal and opens the computer up to no other than Chinese hackers? Well....

Also, I can't understand why she supports the DMCA. I recently wrote an essay where I talked about the bad sides of DRM and DMCA, and how I believe it violates the right of free speech.

As you said, she's not all right.
Kaseas
People like this cause AIDS, global warming, poverty, and Facebook.
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