(The phone rings).
HelpDesk: Good morning, Technical Support, how can we help you?
End User: My cupholder is broken.
HelpDesk: I beg your pardon?
End User: My cupholder is broken. I've just put a fresh cup of coffee into it and its broken right off. Can you give me a replacment?
(the HelpDesk techie is justifiably puzzled by this).
HelpDesk: Erm... we don't normally support things like this. Did you get it from a sales rep., or at a trade exhibition, or...?
End User: No, it's built into the front of my computer.
(the HelpDesk techie is now really puzzled by this).
HelpDesk: Oh. Right. Well, can you describe it to me?
End User: Erm... well, okay. It's kind of like a tray that comes out of the front of my PC, with a hole in it for my coffee cup.
HelpDesk: (Stifling a laugh) And does it say anything on the front of this "cupholder"?
End User: Yes, it says "16x"
HelpDesk: (Just about wetting himself) That's not a cupholder, sir. That's your PCs CD ROM drive!
End User: Oh. No-one ever told me I had one of those. Can you give me a new one anyway then?
HelpDesk: Helpo. Technical Support, how may I help you?
End User: Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.
HelpDesk: What sort of trouble?
End User: Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.
HelpDesk: Went away?
End User: They disappeared.
HelpDesk: Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
End User: Nothing.
HelpDesk: Nothing?
End User: It's blank, it won't accept anything when I type.
HelpDesk: Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?
End User: How do I tell?
HelpDesk: (thinks) Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway. Can you see the C:\> prompt on the screen?
End User: What's a sea-prompt?
HelpDesk: (thinks) Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack. Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?
End User: There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.
HelpDesk: (thinks) Ah-at least s/he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem. I wonder if s/he's kicked out his/her monitor's power plug. Does your monitor have a power indicator?
End User: What's a monitor?
HelpDesk: It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?
End User: I don't know.
HelpDesk: Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cable goes into it. Can you see that?
End User: (muffled sound of rustling and jostling) Yes, I think so.
HelpDesk: Great! Follow the cable to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
End User: (pause) Yes, it is.
HelpDesk: (thinks) Hmm. Well, that's interesting. I doubt s/he would have accidentally turned it off, and I don't want to send him/her hunting for the power switch because I don't know what kind of monitor s/he has and it's bound to have more than one switch on it. Maybe the video cable is loose or something. When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?
End User: No.
HelpDesk: Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.
End User: (muffled) Okay, here it is.
HelpDesk: Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.
End User: (still muffled) I can't reach.
HelpDesk: Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?
End User: (clear again) No.
HelpDesk: Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean over?
End User: Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.
HelpDesk: Dark?
End User: Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
HelpDesk: Well, turn on the office light then.
End User: I can't.
HelpDesk: No? Why not?
End User: Because there's been a power cut.
HelpDesk: A power...?!? (thinks) AAAAAAARGH! A power cut? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?
End User: Yes...?
HelpDesk: Good! Go and get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the shop you bought it from.
End User: Really? Is it that bad?
HelpDesk: Yes, I'm afraid it is.
End User: Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?
HelpDesk: Tell them you're TOO STUPID TO OWN A COMPUTER! (the 'phone slams down)
Last edited by m_furquan36 on Thu Mar 09, 2006 2:51 pm; edited 1 time in total
HelpDesk: Good morning, Technical Support, how can we help you?
End User: My cupholder is broken.
HelpDesk: I beg your pardon?
End User: My cupholder is broken. I've just put a fresh cup of coffee into it and its broken right off. Can you give me a replacment?
(the HelpDesk techie is justifiably puzzled by this).
HelpDesk: Erm... we don't normally support things like this. Did you get it from a sales rep., or at a trade exhibition, or...?
End User: No, it's built into the front of my computer.
(the HelpDesk techie is now really puzzled by this).
HelpDesk: Oh. Right. Well, can you describe it to me?
End User: Erm... well, okay. It's kind of like a tray that comes out of the front of my PC, with a hole in it for my coffee cup.
HelpDesk: (Stifling a laugh) And does it say anything on the front of this "cupholder"?
End User: Yes, it says "16x"
HelpDesk: (Just about wetting himself) That's not a cupholder, sir. That's your PCs CD ROM drive!
End User: Oh. No-one ever told me I had one of those. Can you give me a new one anyway then?
HelpDesk: Helpo. Technical Support, how may I help you?
End User: Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.
HelpDesk: What sort of trouble?
End User: Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.
HelpDesk: Went away?
End User: They disappeared.
HelpDesk: Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?
End User: Nothing.
HelpDesk: Nothing?
End User: It's blank, it won't accept anything when I type.
HelpDesk: Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?
End User: How do I tell?
HelpDesk: (thinks) Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway. Can you see the C:\> prompt on the screen?
End User: What's a sea-prompt?
HelpDesk: (thinks) Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack. Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?
End User: There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type.
HelpDesk: (thinks) Ah-at least s/he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem. I wonder if s/he's kicked out his/her monitor's power plug. Does your monitor have a power indicator?
End User: What's a monitor?
HelpDesk: It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?
End User: I don't know.
HelpDesk: Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cable goes into it. Can you see that?
End User: (muffled sound of rustling and jostling) Yes, I think so.
HelpDesk: Great! Follow the cable to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
End User: (pause) Yes, it is.
HelpDesk: (thinks) Hmm. Well, that's interesting. I doubt s/he would have accidentally turned it off, and I don't want to send him/her hunting for the power switch because I don't know what kind of monitor s/he has and it's bound to have more than one switch on it. Maybe the video cable is loose or something. When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?
End User: No.
HelpDesk: Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.
End User: (muffled) Okay, here it is.
HelpDesk: Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer.
End User: (still muffled) I can't reach.
HelpDesk: Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?
End User: (clear again) No.
HelpDesk: Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean over?
End User: Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark.
HelpDesk: Dark?
End User: Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.
HelpDesk: Well, turn on the office light then.
End User: I can't.
HelpDesk: No? Why not?
End User: Because there's been a power cut.
HelpDesk: A power...?!? (thinks) AAAAAAARGH! A power cut? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?
End User: Yes...?
HelpDesk: Good! Go and get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the shop you bought it from.
End User: Really? Is it that bad?
HelpDesk: Yes, I'm afraid it is.
End User: Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?
HelpDesk: Tell them you're TOO STUPID TO OWN A COMPUTER! (the 'phone slams down)
Last edited by m_furquan36 on Thu Mar 09, 2006 2:51 pm; edited 1 time in total
I prefer the first.