muohan
Usually everyone who has a dog either calls him "Rover" or "Boy" or
something similarly familiar. I called my dog "Sex." Well, Sex proved
to be a very embarrassing name. For example, one day I took Sex for a
walk and he ran away from me. I spent hours looking for that dog. A
police came along and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4:00 P.M.
I told him "I'm looking for Sex." My case came up that very Thursday.
I went to City Hall to get a dog license for Sex. The clerk asked what
I wanted and I told him I wanted a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like
to have one too." I explained, "But Sex is a dog." He replied that he
didn't care how she looked. "You don't understand," I said, "I've had
Sex ever since I was two years old!" The clerk looked at me and said,
"Maybe we should license you."
When I decided to get married, I told the minister that it was very
important for me to have Sex at the wedding. He told me to be patient
and wait until after the wedding. I explained "But Sex has played a
big part in my life and my whole existence revolves around Sex." He
said he didn't want to hear any more about my personal life and decided
he wouldn't marry us in his church. I protested by telling him how I
was convinced that everyone coming to the wedding would enjoy having
Sex there. The next day we went to a Justice-of-the-Peace to be
married. My whole family is now barred from the church.
My wife and I took the dog along with us on our honeymoon. When I
checked into the motel I told the desk clerk that I wanted a room for
my wife and I, and a special room for Sex. The clerk replied that
every room in the motel was for sex. Then I explained "Look, I need
Sex there. The next day we went to a Justice-of-the-Peace to be
married. My whole family is now barred from the church.
My wife and I took the dog along with us on our honeymoon. When I
checked into the motel I told the desk clerk that I wanted a room for
my wife and I, and a special room for Sex. The clerk replied that
every room in the motel was for sex. Then I explained "Look, I need
that extra room because Sex keeps me awake all night." The clerk said
"Me, too, but sex in more than one room keeps me awake all week."
One day I told a friend that I had had Sex on TV. He told me he
thought I was an exhibitionist. "But you don't understand," I said,
"It was a contest." He told me I should've sold tickets.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of
the dog. I went before the judge and pleaded "Your honor, I had Sex
before I was married." The judge said "Me, too. So what?"
Well, now I've been thrown into jail, been married, divorced and had
more damn trouble with that dog's name than I ever expected. Why just
the other day I went to a psychiatrist to discuss all my troubles.
During the first session she asked me what my main problem was. I said
"Well, Doctor, Sex has died and left my life." She said "Listen, both
you and I know that sex isn't man's best friend so my advice is to go
and get yourself a dog."
something similarly familiar. I called my dog "Sex." Well, Sex proved
to be a very embarrassing name. For example, one day I took Sex for a
walk and he ran away from me. I spent hours looking for that dog. A
police came along and asked me what I was doing in the alley at 4:00 P.M.
I told him "I'm looking for Sex." My case came up that very Thursday.
I went to City Hall to get a dog license for Sex. The clerk asked what
I wanted and I told him I wanted a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like
to have one too." I explained, "But Sex is a dog." He replied that he
didn't care how she looked. "You don't understand," I said, "I've had
Sex ever since I was two years old!" The clerk looked at me and said,
"Maybe we should license you."
When I decided to get married, I told the minister that it was very
important for me to have Sex at the wedding. He told me to be patient
and wait until after the wedding. I explained "But Sex has played a
big part in my life and my whole existence revolves around Sex." He
said he didn't want to hear any more about my personal life and decided
he wouldn't marry us in his church. I protested by telling him how I
was convinced that everyone coming to the wedding would enjoy having
Sex there. The next day we went to a Justice-of-the-Peace to be
married. My whole family is now barred from the church.
My wife and I took the dog along with us on our honeymoon. When I
checked into the motel I told the desk clerk that I wanted a room for
my wife and I, and a special room for Sex. The clerk replied that
every room in the motel was for sex. Then I explained "Look, I need
Sex there. The next day we went to a Justice-of-the-Peace to be
married. My whole family is now barred from the church.
My wife and I took the dog along with us on our honeymoon. When I
checked into the motel I told the desk clerk that I wanted a room for
my wife and I, and a special room for Sex. The clerk replied that
every room in the motel was for sex. Then I explained "Look, I need
that extra room because Sex keeps me awake all night." The clerk said
"Me, too, but sex in more than one room keeps me awake all week."
One day I told a friend that I had had Sex on TV. He told me he
thought I was an exhibitionist. "But you don't understand," I said,
"It was a contest." He told me I should've sold tickets.
When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of
the dog. I went before the judge and pleaded "Your honor, I had Sex
before I was married." The judge said "Me, too. So what?"
Well, now I've been thrown into jail, been married, divorced and had
more damn trouble with that dog's name than I ever expected. Why just
the other day I went to a psychiatrist to discuss all my troubles.
During the first session she asked me what my main problem was. I said
"Well, Doctor, Sex has died and left my life." She said "Listen, both
you and I know that sex isn't man's best friend so my advice is to go
and get yourself a dog."
