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Kellj's WWE Column *1*

In this the very first edition of my WWE Column, I will review the latest WWE PPV and both the RAW & SMACKDOWN shows. In other words, Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Sunday Night Review!

New Years Revolution

Match 1 – Jerry Lawler v Gregory Helms

A quick match which was set up last Monday Night RAW, after Gregory Helms saying he was sick and tired of The King’s ‘Hurricane’ jokes back when he went by that name. Helms ran rings around Lawler in the beginning but missed a cocky running charge. Jerry finished typically with a top-rope fist-drop.

Match 2 – Bra & Panties Gauntlet. Ashley, Victoria, Candice, Torrie Wilson, Maria

The eye candy of the PPV. Maria and Candice started off and, after having her top ripped off, Maria came back quickly and eliminated Candice by getting her down to bra & panties. Then Maria took off Torrie Wilson’s top to even the two of them up. They then rolled about for a bit till Maria eliminated Torrie Wilson whilst she was complaining to the ref. Victoria was next and physically dominated Maria until taking her pants off & eliminating her. Then Mae Young & The Fabulous Moolah entered and eliminated themselves after ripping off Victoria’s top. Ashley then came down and rolled through an attempt at the Widow’s Peak to rip off Victoria’s pants & so winning the gauntlet. Ashley then took off her top & skirt in celebration.

Match 3 – Shelton Benjamin v Viscera

This match was made earlier in the night when Viscera suggested things like only big Vis can to Shelton’s mama. After Vis dominating the first part of the match with a huge Samoan drop, he was hit on the head with Shelton’s mama’s pocketbook, which set up a Dragon Whip from Shelton to pick up the victory. Later it was discovered that the pocket book had a brick inside.

Match 4 – Trish Stratus v Mickie James Woman’s Title

Very intense for a Woman’s Title match, the action spilled outside at one point. Many punches were exchanged but Mickie didn’t capitalise after using the Stratusfaction, and when going for her Mick Kick, dodged by Trish, she got caught by the Chick kick and Trish covered to retain the Title.

Match 5 – Edge v Ric Flair Intercontinental Championship

Edge started the match concentrating on Flair’s back and was doing it well, yet Flair stuck in there and managed to get an opening and egan work on Edge’s leg, softening it up for the Figure-4. After Lita distracted him, Flair saw Edge coming from behind and backdropped him out of the ring. Flair then put Lita in the Figure-4 instead. Edge then entered the ring & blasted Flair three time with his briefcase to get DQ’ed and lose the match.

Match 6 – Big Show v HHH

Big Show went into this match with a huge cast on his right hand, which he used as a weapon early on. However HHH managed to avoid it until backed into the corner, when he dodged and the cast split. HHH then managed to tear the cast off and went to work on the hand. Show tried for the chokeslam but couldn’t get the strength back. HHH then got his sledgehammer put Show, using his broken hand, snapped it in half. HHH, for once, started to use other weapons in the match and used the steps and a steel chair to wreak havoc with Show’s hand. HHH finished the match hitting Show with the broken sledgehammer and the pedigree. Very good, enjoyable match.

Main Event – Elimination Chamber Match.
Cena, Carlito, Kane, HBK, Masters, Angle

Cena began the against HBK. Their initial confrontation was rather slow although it was hard to see how they could have been more physical so early, since both men were going to last a while. Then, at the 4 minute mark, Carlito enters & hits a dropkick & somersault senton over the ropes to crash Michaels into the steel. Just as Cena & HBK finally agree to team up, Angle enters & goes suplex crazy on all 3 men. He adds great intensity to the fast pace that Carlito gave. Angle then places Carlito in the Ankle Lock, but he is saved by new entrant Chris Masters. Not long prior to Kane making his entry, Angle places Cena in the Ankle Lock, but it’s abruptly stopped out of nowhere by Sweet Chin Music, and HBK gets the pinfall on Angle! After a couple of, Kane comes in & cleans house. But Carlito/Masters combo manages to hold him. The 2nd unpredictable elimination comes when Kane is pinned. Make that 3 as Carlito & Masters continue their teamwork in eliminating a bloodied HBK (despite just hitting Sweet Chin Music on Cena). The Carlito/Masters team dominate Cena, until Carlito double-crosses Masters & pins him. Cena then immediately pins Carlito with a roll-up to win the match.

Surprise Last Match – John Cena v Edge

After a bloodied and battered John Cena had his terrific match against five other men in the Elimination Chamber, Vince came out to say that Edge had cashed in his money in the bank, and had demanded a match with Cena. The match started immediately.Edge went to town on Cena at first with a barrage of punches and kicks. Then, as Cena was getting up, Edge Speared the Champ and pinned him…. however Cena managed to kick out! Edge then speared him a second time to capture the WWE Championship.



John Cena kicked off RAW and said that he knew he was getting a mixed reaction, but with still give it his all for the people who still follow him. He acknowledged Edge’s good timing. Then Cena said he wanted his rematch clause. Lita came out to Edge’s music and said Mr. McMahon had been ‘orally persuaded’ to make the rematch at the royal rumble. Later on, Mr. McMahon said if Cena got involved with Edge and Lita later that night, he would lose his rematch.

Royal Rumble Qualifiers

1 - Chavo Guerrero v Robert Conway
Chavo picked up a win over the Conman, saluting his Uncle Eddie (RIP) finishing Conway off with the 3 amigos and a frog splash.

2 – Shelton Benjamin v Val Venis
Shelton’s Momma helped Shelton onto the road to Wrestlemania by stabbing Val’s rear with a hairpin to set up the T-Bone Suplex and get Shelton into the Royal Rumble.

3 – Kane v Snitsky
This one ended very quickly with Kane thoroughly beating Snitsky in a relatively short time. Kane said this was the beginning of his path of destruction.

Woman’s Title Match – Trish Stratus v Ashley

The match finally got underway after Mickie James demanded the Crowd give their respect to Trish. In a short time, Trish mistimed an attack and Ashley capitalised and went for the pin. Mickie James jumped into the ring and attacked Ashley to cause a DQ.

Tag Match – HBK/Angle v Carlito/Masters

Angle & Michaels, despite their differences, started to work will as a team until both men were tossed out of the ring and Angle accused HBK of not backing him up. This changed the momentum and after HBK was tagged in, he found himself needing to tag Angle in again after a heavy beating. Angle twice was nowhere to be found for HBK, so when Michaels finally got Angle in, he tuned up the band and gave angle sweet chin music. Chris Masters then got the Master Lock in and Angle didn’t tap but went out on his feet.

The End

This really disappointed me in how for they went, but anyway.
The bed was in the ring, Edge & Lita came down and after Lita being apparently naked under the sheets, Ric Flair came out for Retribution for the NYR match and to point his disgust at what they were doing. Edge however, got a chair and hit Flair with it. Taking flair to the outside, Edge laid a chair on the announce table, Flair on the chair, then got a second chair to give a kind of Con-Chair-To to Flair. Cena ran through the crowd and Edge retreated. Cena then went to the ring and pulled out Lita, who now had her top & panties on and gave her an FU when Edge didn’t make the save.


Batista’s Injury

When already battling through one injury, Batista picked up a triceps injury the past week and vacated his own title to Teddy Long. He said that he handed it over because he couldn’t defend his title. The Fans were begging him to reconsider on his way out, and Batista gave his expensive jacket to one of the kid’s. The SMACKDOWN GM then announced a 20 man over-the-top Battle Royal to determine the new World Heavyweight Champion.

US Title Match 7/7 – Randy Orton (Booker T’s sub) v Chris Benoit

This was a decent match with a lot of action, the end was, however, very disappointing. After the ref was out cold, Benoit got the Crossface locked in and Orton tapped, but the ref didn’t see. Benoit then went to revive the ref. Orton won after an illegal cheap shot and Booker T was crowned US Champion.

Main Event – 20 man over-the-top Battle Royal – World Heavyweight Title

As with all Battle Royals, this was an awesome match, made even better by the fact that it was the first even Battle Royal in which the World Heavyweight Championship was decided. Near the end, Mark Henry and surprise last entrant, Kurt ANGLE, went to the outside but were not eliminated because they didn’t go over the top rope. Mark Henry Military Pressed Angle through the announce table and hen went to work on the only opponent left in the ring, Rey Mysterio. Yet Mysterio gave an excellent display giving Henry two 619’s, put couldn’t get him over the top. Mark Henry eventually got the better of him and put him over. Mark thought he had won until an Angle with straps down returned to the ring. After absorbing punishment from The World’s Strongest Man, Angle managed to Angle Slam Mark Henry. Mark still prevailed though until Angle managed to turn a hurricanrana into a head scissors and shift Mark Henry’s weight over the ropes. Both men landed but Henry landed on two feet whilst Angle landed on one. The rule: BOTH feet must touch the ground to be eliminated. So that leaves us with the new World Heavyweight Champion: Kurt Angle!

Closing Comments

So these are my views on the shows of the past week. The Pay-Per-View, although not the best I have seen, was still entertaining enough with a few brilliant matches (Big Show v HHH & The Elimination Chamber). This was followed on RAW with some decent match-ups, but the show ending which, I think, ruined the show, was a bad script and I think went too far. As far as SMACKDOWN goes, I don’t think the Best of 7 Series should have ended the way it did nor should there have been a ‘sub’. However the Battle Royal was absolutely brilliant, and the surprise of Kurt Angle made it even more so. Good ending, but I’d like to know what happens on RAW tomorrow!

Well if you read the whole article, thank you. Even if you only read a little bit, thank you. If you don’t mind, I would like some comments on this column so that I know whether or not to make another next week. I will be thankful for both positive and negative comments.
Well Yea.. I saw This PPV
It was pretty good .. beacause finally John cena lost his title
Hope Cena won't take this in this time..
Thanks for the reply wwe4life. Any comments are welcome.....
i think it was garbage the way that cena lost his title he was a great champ. he still is the champ in many people's eyes. yeah, edge did use his brain but it shows he cant get the job done the way all the other great champions did.
nice job man, i enjoyed reading it! i hope you can continue posting this every now and then! Laughing
Yeah thnks for that.
I'll try to get the next one up this coming sunday.

Needed to work on coursework this week, so I won't post the review till next week
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