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yun4
WIFE 1.0
Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity.

Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications.

I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!

Thanks,

A Troubled User.



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
REPLY:
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Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!!

It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0.

It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this.

Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support.

" I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation."

I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C: \ APOLOGIZE.
Because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great! program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.

Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these programs.

Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5.

Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software.

I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !


WARNING!!!

DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt
3.3.
This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause
irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,

Tech Support
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
STUDENT MEMO
TO All Students!
Memo to all students:

In order to assure the highest levels of quality
work and productivity from students, it will be
our policy to keep all students well taught
through our program of SPECIAL HIGH
INTENSITY TEACHING (S.H.I.T.).

We are trying to give our students more S.H.I.T.
than anyone else. If you feel that you do not
receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the course,
please see your lecturer. You will be
immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T.
list, and our lecturers are especially
skilled at seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T.
you can handle.

Students who don't take their S.H.I.T. will be
placed in DEPARTMENTAL EDUCATIONAL EVALUATION
PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T.).

Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T.
seriously will have to go to EDUCATIONAL
ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T. S.H.I.T.). Since our
lecturers took S.H.I.T. before they graduated,
they don't have to do S.H.I.T. anymore, and are
all full of S.H.I.T. already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be
interested in a job teaching
others. We can add your name to our BASIC
UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST
(B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T.).

For students who are intending to pursue a
career in management and consulting, we will
refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL
OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION
(M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T.). This course emphasizes how
to manage M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T.

If you have further questions, please direct
them to our HEAD OF TEACHING, SPECIAL HIGH
INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T. S.H.I.T.).

Thank you, BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH
INTENSITY TEACHING
(B.I.G.S.H.I.T.)


Sincerely,

The Director Under the Michigan Bureau of Super
High Intensity
Teaching. (The D.U.M.B. S.H.I.T.)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SHORT JOKES

3 Guys were introduced to a girl.
Hi,.... I'm Peter, not a saint.
I'm Paul not a POPE.
I'm John not a Baptist...
The girl replied.. Hi.. I'm Mary, not a VIRGIN.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Q: Why do men have pubic hair?
A: A nest for their bird...
Q: Why do women have pubic hair?
A: A resting place for the coming bird !!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What does it mean when a girl offers PEPSI to a guy :
P : Please
E : Enter
P : Penis
S : Slowly
I : Inside
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A 95 year old man sucks his 90 year old wife's breast for half and hour
and drinks 2 drops of milk.
POSTMORTEM REPORT - death due to drinking milk after EXPIRY DATE !!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Husband reading a book on bed with wife beside. His finger went to tease
wife's pussy.
Wife ask "you want sex"?
Husband answer "No", just want to wet my finger to turn the page.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rooster and Cat going over bridge. Cat slips & falls into river.
Rooster can't stop laughing.
Moral of story? Whenever there's a wet pussy, there's a happy ******.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There are 3 Male and 1 Female pencils in a box. The Female pencil got
pregnant !!
Which Male pencil is responsible? THE ONE WITHOUT THE RUBBER.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

3 Roosters: normal, retarded and a gay.
Normal : ******-a-doodle-dooo !!!
Retarded : doodle-******-a-dooo !!!
Gay : any-******-will dooo !!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Girlfriends are appetizers. Tastes good at any time.
Mistresses are Tomyams.. Hot and spicy. Eaten frequently.
WIVES are Maggie. Eaten when there's nothing to eat.!!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Income Tax office asked a Prostitute why she puts her occupation as
CHICKEN FARMER.
She replied : I RAISED 5,000 COCKS LAST YEAR.!!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A Girl who opens her hand receives gifts.
Open her heart receives love.
But when she opens her legs, she receives happiness.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yesterday's News:- A nun jogging at Jogger' Park was raped by 4 guys.
Today's News :- Nearly 100 nuns found jogging at the park.
n0obie4life
LOL THE WIFE ONE RAWKS Very Happy.

and please remove the dirty ones.
fly737
Razz hehe
seanooi
n0obie4life wrote:
LOL THE WIFE ONE RAWKS Very Happy.

and please remove the dirty ones.


i totally agree on you. Laughing
seanooi
what is the joke suppose to mean?

See no humour, hear no laughter....
homer09001
seanooi wrote:
what is the joke suppose to mean?

See no humour, hear no laughter....


when you get older you SHOULD understand lol
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