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The best host ever.... :D (parody)





Daniel15
http://deadhost.net/
In case you don't notice, this site is a parody of a web hosting company (not a real company)

Some quotes from the site:
Quote:

We specialise in providing low quality, high cost web hosting solutions to gullible people who fall for our adverts. We run extremely powerful Windows 3.1 servers with our custom-built PlywoodPANEL control panel system - the perfect solution for your pathetic and hopeless idea for a dotcom.
...
The confidence we have in our equipment means that we can guarantee a massive 1.8% uptime - equal to or less than any other host of a similar poor quality. What's more, if we do not fail to reach this, we promise to tell you where to go within 24 days if you complain.

Quote:

Service Level Agreement (SLA)
...
Up-time
We promise that there will be at least some up-time during the course of a year. It won't be very much, though.

It's pretty funny the first time you see it Very Happy
n0obie4life
Thanks for the great host.

Whenever I need paid hosting, I'll go there.

The "Unprofessional" package rocks imo.

Also, the signup page is funny Razz
http://deadhost.net/signup.php

Also, you can test their control panel - http://deadhost.net/customers/signin.php
riv_
Ha! ha! ha!
I think that's where I was hosted last!
Ha! Ha!
The mind your own business package!!!!! With free "visit this porn site" footer added to all outgoing emails!
Oh, I'm busting a gut!
Daniel15
I would user their hosting, but personally, I think it has one problem: their server. I believe that their server is waaay too powerful for their own good. Windows 3.1?!??! What are they thinking? They should use AN/FSQ-7 servers:
Quote:

The AN/FSQ-7 was by far the largest computer ever built, and is expected to hold that record. It consisted of two complete Whirlwind II computers installed in a 4-story building
...
SPEED 75 KIPS (KiloInstructions Per Second)
...
PRICE $238 million

(source: http://www.old-computers.com/museum/computer.asp?st=1&c=1050)

Very HappyVery HappyVery Happy:

On a side note, the host that the owner of this site is using to host it is pretty expensive: http://sitehq.co.uk/hosting_linux_mysql_php.php

500th post Very HappyDancingDancingDancingDancing Dancing Dancing Dancing Applause Applause
n0obie4life
IMO, they should use

http://www.old-computers.com/museum/computer.asp?st=1&c=1047

Very Happy
Daniel15
That would be good as well.
Personally though, I'd prefer to pay $238 million for a server Very HappyVery HappyVery Happy

Or even worse... Use Tripod servers (NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
n0obie4life
daniel15 wrote:
Or even worse... Use Tripod servers (NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)


Tripods servers are good, just that it's overloaded, yams.
Daniel15
n0obie4life wrote:
daniel15 wrote:
Or even worse... Use Tripod servers (NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)


Tripods servers are good, just that it's overloaded, yams.

Not if you want to use *real* PHP, anyway, that's what I've heard.

What about a server where you can only create one page? And you have to use their limited design tools (very very limited)? And they also have a 50MB bandwidth limit? Well, the sad thing is, this host actually exists! The stupidest host ever: http://www.webspawner.com/
n0obie4life
I provide 1mb space and 0.2mb bandwidth on n00bhost.

Anyone interested?

BTW, the login is

http://<ip>/~username

No cpanel no nothing..
luis123456,webspace4free.
it΄s a proer joke, and very amused of course. -
DarkAngel
Lol, awesome web host! Laughing The "Hamster Power" package is especially funny!
waiteck
Lol.. I must say that the web master should kinda bored at home lol..
webapp
I been with few hosts i never tried this one...will try when i decide i want to switch my current provider..
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