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Worker's Compensation





demex
I hope this one hasn't already been said....

Quote:
Workers' Compensation

This is a bricklayer's accident report, which was printed in the newsletter of the Australian
equivalent of the Workers' Compensation Board...

Dear Sir,
I am writing in response to your request for additional information
in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put 'poor planning' as the
cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust
the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working
alone on the roof of a new six-story building. When I completed my
work, I found that I had some bricks left over which, when weighed
later, were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs. Rather than
carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel
by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building
on the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level I went up
onto the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it.
Then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure
a slow descent of the bricks.

You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh
135 lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly,
I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless
to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In
the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel, which was now
proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explained
the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as
listed in section 3 of the accident report form. Slowed only slightly,
I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my
right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley.

Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was
able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience
pain. At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks
hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of
the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs.
I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid
descent down the side of the building.

In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This
accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and several
lacerations of my legs and lower body.

Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel
seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the
pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertebrae were cracked. I
am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks,
in pain and unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence
of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty
barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two
broken legs.

I hope this answers your inquiry.
Kind Regards,
Mike Pashby



http://mistupid.com
mOrpheuS
Holy @#$^%#....
I don't know what to say !!!
that man is so......"unlucky" Laughing

I'm sure this is not real though.
noliver
I have seen differet versions of this joke. In one he is a mexican and the other a black. But still, quite funny.

Cheers,
Nick.
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