FRIHOST FORUMS SEARCH FAQ TOS BLOGS COMPETITIONS
You are invited to Log in or Register a free Frihost Account!


What do I do during sex?





Nerdy_Juliet
So I'm new to this whole thing, me and my boyfriend have been dating for at least 3 months, and we get along amazingly. He knows I want to have sex with him, and he wants to have sex with me. But he's had sex before, and I've never had sex.... And I'm not sure who I should talk to, I can't talk to anyone about it so I guess I came here.... But is it okay for me to just you know be there and let him take control? And just kinda let him do most of it, I mean I know kissing and stuff. But idk what I should do....
Help?
kenxeiko
Uhm..

Actually, I don't know about something like this.

Well, I'm sure someone in here must be know about it. Just wait for others reply.
Coen
When just starting sex it is very important to take everything slowly and in steps, and always make sure that both sides are comfortable with what is happening at any given time. If you are unsure then talk about it first. Tell him what you are uncomfortable about and make sure that he is aware. It is likely that he will automatically do whatever he can to make sure you are comfortable with what you two are doing, just like you will no doubt try the same for him. Despite that, communication is still key. Both prior to and during sex.

As for the sex itself, you could also do that in steps depending on what you want to do. First of all it would be nice to know how old you are, even though I know you never ask a woman for her age. Have you ever seen each other naked before? Have you done anything, touched each other while nude, etc.? If you did not then that would be a nice place to start, in my opinion. Again, make sure that you keep communicating about everything. Tell each other what you like, but maybe more importantly what you don't like. It is my experience that talking about sex makes it a whole lot better and removes a lot of unneeded tension. It may feel somewhat awkward at first, but believe me when I say that it will make the experience much better in the end.

Once you are more comfortable around each other you could please each other using your hands, or maybe have one masturbate in front of the other (it is all a matter of preference, what arouses you and/or your partner and what do you like), oral sex sometimes is the next step and after that actual intercourse. All of these can be taken in steps and can go as fast and as slow as you like. For my girlfriend and me, I was the one who was inexperienced whereas she knew what she was doing. We took it really slow and just talked a lot, made sure both her, but especially me (seeing it was all new to me) were comfortable with what was happening and what we were doing.

Now, seeing I am male and we are usually the more dominant part (by lack of a better word), being comfortable is less of a problem for me. I do not have any children or sisters so I have little knowledge about the emotional process regarding sex for women. If it is a comfortable idea to talk about having sex with for instance a friend, (older) sibling or parent then I would do it. What is most important is that you are comfortable and relaxed. Because otherwise sex could become something you relate to tension and negative emotions and feelings and that is not what sex is at all.

As for letting him take control (in case I did not make that clear yet): I would say no to that. Sex is something you have together. Now, obviously during the process one party will have more control than the other, for instance depending on how you are having sex or what you are currently doing at a given time. However, just letting him take control would go too far, I think. Like I said, it is wise to communicate about everything, to talk about everything and by doing that making sure that you both like what is happening. I may have misinterpreted what you meant by 'letting him take control' so my advice may have been too strong. Either way, I hope I somewhat answered your question. If you still have more questions then feel free to let me know, I'll happily try to help out as much as I can, either via forum posts or a PM.
kocoblue
If he knows you haven't had sex before he wont be expecting a porn star show but passionate kiss. holds and hugs make a guy feel like he doing a good job especially in a relationship.

His objective is to make you comfortable, so it doesn't go out of hand and post sex awkwardness afterwards. so talk to him and tell him what you like and how you want.
codersfriend
oh you want to know what to do when you're engaging it? .. just go with the flow
sameerseo
Condoms always keep in your pockets.
busman
If your a woman condoms is probably the best tip ever haha. But honestly you should just try to do what feels right. It's always gonna be akward the first time because most guys don't know anything about being gentle or even sexy style rough their first 10 times having sex, so don't learn to hate sex if it sucks the first few times. Trust me it gets better Smile
pauline5765
Don't forget the condoms.

The first thing you do is o ensure your protection, since you're a woman. Don't let him do all the things he wants to do. Try to search for other tips in the internet... the decent ones, okay? And if ever you have watched porn.. that's basically what you're gonna do too. Though if you have already felt pain or you think what is being done unto you is already too much or is already morally degrading you... always say STOP.
kaysch
Yeah, and don't write anything about this on a public forum.
It's your personal experience and the most private thing on earth (although everybody else does it, too), so just keep your experience and your doubts to your boyfriend and yourself.
Da Rossa
So, considering this is a 7-month revived topic, the op could come back here and tell her experience!!
nickfyoung
Can I suggest that you both get into a shower first and have a good scrub up. Very important if you are going to be intimate.
The experience together will help to remove anxieties and will make you both more comfortable with each other.
After that you have had some good advice. Sex is not just sex. Sex is sex if it is rape etc. Sex is a small part of intimacy and a special time of togetherness. It is the climax of that intimate time together and is very special.
Try and keep it special. Just enjoy the intimacy and closeness and passion and the sex part will take care of itself. Enjoy.
visualconcepts
Nerdy_Juliet wrote:
So I'm new to this whole thing, me and my boyfriend have been dating for at least 3 months, and we get along amazingly. He knows I want to have sex with him, and he wants to have sex with me. But he's had sex before, and I've never had sex.... And I'm not sure who I should talk to, I can't talk to anyone about it so I guess I came here.... But is it okay for me to just you know be there and let him take control? And just kinda let him do most of it, I mean I know kissing and stuff. But idk what I should do....
Help?


i think you should not wait, this is right time, you can only get complete satisfaction if you satisfy him, so make sure you satisfy him, and he will take care of the rest, to make him feel good, start off with blowing his thingy.
loveandormoney
Nerdy_Juliet wrote:
So I'm new to this whole thing, me and my boyfriend have been dating for at least 3 months, and we get along amazingly. He knows I want to have sex with him, and he wants to have sex with me. But he's had sex before, and I've never had sex.... And I'm not sure who I should talk to, I can't talk to anyone about it so I guess I came here.... But is it okay for me to just you know be there and let him take control? And just kinda let him do most of it, I mean I know kissing and stuff. But idk what I should do....
Help?


First thing
if You are married or not
if You want to have sex:

Make Your darling laugh.

If not, then it will be boring.
johannespilz
interesting. First: I assume u are a girl.

It's good that you talk about having sex and that u know he had before and I didn't (does he know that)

I think u shouldn't worry at all. like someone wrote before men are usually the more dominant, the leading gender. it's ok to just relax and see what happens. It's ok to know know what to do. Talk and see what your boyfriend tells you.

I think the most important is to talk about what u want, do you have phantasies? He should tell you his. And depending on if you like his ideas you can try out whatever comes up. He shouldn't expect u to know everything and that u take the leading role.

just dot be shy and wait for the manual of how to do sex. Trust your instinct and your feelings. Just do what feels good and it will automatically work out. Because your boyfriend will or should recognize as well what u like and because of that (hopefully) will repeat this more often.


Have fun Smile
nickfyoung
You know kissing and stuff which is part of getting intimate. Kissing leads to tongue kissing which is getting more intimate. At this stage you both will be getting sexually aroused, him by erection and you by wetness. Undressing each other is now getting more intimate. By the time you have gone through all that the actual sex part will just follow naturally. It can be slow and passionate or fast and frenzied depending on your level of arousal. This will be the same every time which means there will be variety and excitement.
Making love is a special time and an expression of intimate love. It can be abused by excessive fetishes and become just sex. Try and keep it special and enjoy.
zimmer
what can i add. All the experts in frihost already added based on there experience.. lol. well, if you ask me i dont know either but for sure it is fun and excited.
Da Rossa
Where is the OP Where is the OP Where is the OP Sad

Too sad this is one more topic in which one comes here and leaves us without the feedback. Probably an insecure girl who was desperate and seeking advice anywhere she could find, given she doesn't have an open channel with her mother Sad
loveandormoney
johannespilz wrote:
interesting. First: I assume u are a girl.

It's good that you talk about having sex and that u know he had before and I didn't (does he know that)

I think u shouldn't worry at all. like someone wrote before men are usually the more dominant, the leading gender. it's ok to just relax and see what happens. It's ok to know know what to do. Talk and see what your boyfriend tells you.

I think the most important is to talk about what u want, do you have phantasies? He should tell you his. And depending on if you like his ideas you can try out whatever comes up. He shouldn't expect u to know everything and that u take the leading role.

just dot be shy and wait for the manual of how to do sex. Trust your instinct and your feelings. Just do what feels good and it will automatically work out. Because your boyfriend will or should recognize as well what u like and because of that (hopefully) will repeat this more often.


Have fun Smile



Is MAN the leading gender in relationships?
Also is man the leading gender in education of the children?
airh3ad
Wow always make sure that both sides are comfortable with what is happening at any given time. if you have time try to watch kamasutra i'ts a good type of sex movies, and rated r movies also get the positions there.
loveandormoney
Quote:
Wow always make sure that both sides are comfortable


Your body will help You.
If You and Your darling do not feel comfortable
then Your muscels feel cold and hard.
zaxacongrejo
sex
loveandormoney
Love?
firstroad
watch some porn
i don't think that porn is only for being entertained and i also don't think it is only for men
i watched a video where it was the girl's first time and i learned how the man was behaving
loveandormoney
porn
You did make me laugh.
Porn has nothing to do with Sex.

People, who bought this videos, want to make their parents angry.

What is the contents
of a porn?

He is bored and hard working and does move like a steam-machine.
She is looking stupid and look like she is eating pop-corn.

If You would really do this with Your darling, darlin will yawn and run away.


Helterskelter is more exciting then a porn.
Insanity
I think since he knows what he is doing, just let him do all the work. Just don't have very high expectations for your first time.
loveandormoney
Why do You call "Sex" as work?

Is it a hard job?
truespeed
Lie back and think of

zaxacongrejo
(Oh Oh Oh Oh) (Oh Oh Oh Oh) (Oh Oh Oh Oh) Ha Ha Ha (Oh Oh Oh Oh)
Very Happy Very Happy
loveandormoney
truespeed wrote:
Lie back and think of



Do You collect money for this organisation?
crystalkey
This thread is out of control. If the young lady had to ask in a public forum in the first place, then she (and probably he) is not ready. They should wait for marriage, stay away from the blogs, and then tell us ...
truespeed
loveandormoney wrote:


Do You collect money for this organisation?


It's a flag.
loveandormoney
Quote:

This thread is out of control. If the young lady had to ask in a public forum in the first place, then she (and probably he) is not ready. They should wait for marriage, stay away from the blogs, and then tell us ...


Good morning.
If a topic is uncomfortable, then adults are used to make jokes about it and try to flee. So I have the same opinion as You.
So this is a chance and a easy way, to talk about sex here.
Why is talking about sex or doing sex uncomfortable?
Why so many people are afraid?
Why there is an industry selling videos with people without shirts and skirts and without pants?
It sounds like "!984".
The big secret.
First impression here
many male users expect, the women are enemies. Then it is not easy, to do sex.
Second impression here, the man is dancing around and doing action and the woman is lying on the bed.
Where is the pleasure?
Regards
ninacax
I think it was a fake topic.. just saying.
And if is true, just relax lady.. we all had/will have this experience and is different to each one.
If he is your boyfriend and the first time wasn't the best experience of your life, you gonna have many chances to make it better.
Ashton-Fordyce
relax hey and take it easy!

its not like you only have 1 shot at it

if it wasnt fun, just awkward, it will probably be less so next time, and eventually once u get more comfortable with each other, being naked with each other, it will start to become awesome

but yeah relax a little its not something you need to 'perfect' good luck Laughing
loveandormoney
ninacax wrote:
I think it was a fake topic.. just saying.
And if is true, just relax lady.. we all had/will have this experience and is different to each one.
If he is your boyfriend and the first time wasn't the best experience of your life, you gonna have many chances to make it better.


No
the first post is no fake.
This is telling my experiences in the www and in Real Life: Boys think like this.

Maybe they are to lazy to ask h their parents about sex and only ask their dad:
"How can I repair my car?".

Just search in the www:
Boy or Man and sex-problems: You will see millions of hits.
johannespilz
what is this thread about? listen to your feelings, do what u feel like doing and dont think to much that u can mess it up or that the other doesnt like it. if u act through your own intentions it is always ok and if the partner loves u he will like it anyway
loveandormoney
Quote:
listen to your feelings,


Gratulatiions.


Not all people are free.
romiduk
Maybe u need to watching film "kamasutra" as a tutorial for u.
loveandormoney
But his would be very boring.
stanloplato
Quote:
No one here knows your boyfriend's preferences; so we're only guessing as to what he'd want you to do. Perhaps the best thing that you could do would be to talk to him sometime when you aren't in the middle of having sex, and ask him what he'd like.

But I know you want specific ideas, so here's one:
Most people really get off on knowing that they're pleasing their partner. So one of the most reliable things you can do to make sex better for him is to tell him how to make it better for you.

(a) When what he's doing is turning you on, let him know it. Whether by moaning, or just outright saying "Oh god I love how you do that."

(b) Speak up and let him know what you *wish* he was doing. It might seem like you're being bossy, but trust me, most people love getting constructive directions that help them to be better lovers.

And if you start communicating during sex like that it might also help him to feel like he can start telling you what he wants as well. So that you won't have to keep wondering if you're doing it right. Or asking strangers on the Internet. Wink


MOD - Quotes added; please provide which sites you used for your Sources.
Material you did not write should be quoted and sourced. Please refer to the forum rules here: http://www.frihost.com/forums/vt-13011.html
- Ankhanu
Ankhanu
This thread is over a year old, and the OP has never returned... it's of questionable content for the forum. As such, I'm locking it.
Related topics
Celeberty 's :D:D
As if silicon bewbies weren't enough of a gift from God...
Sinning by thought
Has sex before marry???
i'm new and funny
Sex Before Marriage
Was Eve the first Woman?
why do we have to answer a ringing phone
Do you think of others while you're having sex?
chav jokes
Why do some men have a big penis attitude & can't work i
Painful Sex
10 percent live only for sex online
Are female breasts sex organs or organs for feeding children
This topic is locked: you cannot edit posts or make replies.    Frihost Forum Index -> Lifestyle and News -> Relationships

FRIHOST HOME | FAQ | TOS | ABOUT US | CONTACT US | SITE MAP
© 2005-2011 Frihost, forums powered by phpBB.