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Whose life are you living?





GuidanceReader
This question was posed to me today...

So are you being true to yourself and living the life you want, or are you living a life that is not what you want for what ever reason that may be (responsibilities, cash etc)...

Can you really take over that control and make a shift to overcome those obstacles that are preventing you from being who you want to be?
deanhills
Deep question, particularly for people who are posting with pseudonyms! Smile

I really don't know what "true to oneself" means. I think we rarely have the luxury to define ourselves. Mostly the people around us get to do that for us. Particularly when we are kids. We may think we are in control, and we may have grand ideas about who we are and where we are going to end up one day. But there will always be other people who are pulling our strings. The only part that may be uniquely our own is how we respond to that as part of a community of people. And what one makes of it.
Ankhanu
GuidanceReader wrote:
So are you being true to yourself and living the life you want, or are you living a life that is not what you want for what ever reason that may be (responsibilities, cash etc)...

Can you really take over that control and make a shift to overcome those obstacles that are preventing you from being who you want to be?

Who's to say that who we want to be is who we truly are??? That seems to be a fairly strong assumption to me.
Maybe who we are is someone who dreams, or strives to be someone else... Maybe who we are is someone who toils under the yoke of responsibilities and obligations...
Perhaps my dream to be a dump truck when I was little wasn't really who I was.

That aside, My view is the opposite of Dean's; yes we can control our situations, to a certain extent. In many modern situations, where we're not being systematically held back by major societal issues (such as totalitarianism, systematic oppression of minorities or other imagined lessers, incarceration and the like), the real obstacles to success is our own complacency and unwillingness to make the sacrifices necessary to overcome our obstacles. If we truly desire, and are willing to make the sacrifices necessary, we can be pretty much anything we realistically want to be.
deanhills
Ankhanu wrote:
That aside, My view is the opposite of Dean's; yes we can control our situations, to a certain extent. In many modern situations, where we're not being systematically held back by major societal issues (such as totalitarianism, systematic oppression of minorities or other imagined lessers, incarceration and the like), the real obstacles to success is our own complacency and unwillingness to make the sacrifices necessary to overcome our obstacles. If we truly desire, and are willing to make the sacrifices necessary, we can be pretty much anything we realistically want to be.
Are you sure yours is the opposite? Of course we can control what we can control. That is pretty much what I said. But there is always a part we can't control. The only part we can control in that situation is our response to what we can't control. Which in essence is to let go.
Ankhanu
My point was at which we can't controls usually less of an impediment than we make it out to be. You seemed to be saying that what defines us are largely external factors, other people and the like... As you say, there are others pulling our strings. My position is at those strings are not chains, but floss; we have the power to overcome them.
deanhills
Ankhanu wrote:
My point was at which we can't controls usually less of an impediment than we make it out to be. You seemed to be saying that what defines us are largely external factors, other people and the like... As you say, there are others pulling our strings. My position is at those strings are not chains, but floss; we have the power to overcome them.
No, we don't always have the power to overcome them. If you have cancer, depending how far advanced, you will die. You can't overcome it. You can only adjust to it. If you have a great dream of becoming a scientist and you have no aptitude for science and math - you'll have to make some adjustments, like doing something different than becoming a scientist. You probably could get into being a free lance writer of popular science. But to be a great scientist, one has to have the basics in place. I'm sure all of us could work on passing math and science, but to really excel at it, we have to be excellent in math and science and not all people are equally gifted in the latter. Someone may dream of becoming a famous pianist, but may have an accident and lose two fingers. They may be able to replace the fingers, and play the piano, but perhaps not perfectly. Etc. Etc. Or they may not be as gifted to make it to the top as they had hoped to be. So they adjust and teach piano instead or branch out in something different. Like being dealt a deck of cards in a life time and making the best of the hand one has been dealt.
Ankhanu
deanhills wrote:
Ankhanu wrote:
My point was at which we can't controls usually less of an impediment than we make it out to be. You seemed to be saying that what defines us are largely external factors, other people and the like... As you say, there are others pulling our strings. My position is at those strings are not chains, but floss; we have the power to overcome them.
No, we don't always have the power to overcome them. If you have cancer, depending how far advanced, you will die. You can't overcome it. You can only adjust to it. If you have a great dream of becoming a scientist and you have no aptitude for science and math - you'll have to make some adjustments, like doing something different than becoming a scientist. You probably could get into being a free lance writer of popular science. But to be a great scientist, one has to have the basics in place. I'm sure all of us could work on passing math and science, but to really excel at it, we have to be excellent in math and science and not all people are equally gifted in the latter. Someone may dream of becoming a famous pianist, but may have an accident and lose two fingers. They may be able to replace the fingers, and play the piano, but perhaps not perfectly. Etc. Etc. Or they may not be as gifted to make it to the top as they had hoped to be. So they adjust and teach piano instead or branch out in something different. Like being dealt a deck of cards in a life time and making the best of the hand one has been dealt.

Yes, terminal illness is one of those "can't control/overcome" problems... The rest are not.
Science is a skill, as is math. Aptitude be damned, one can learn those skills and learn to apply them. Really, the limiting factor in science and math are laziness, lack of imagination and lack of curiosity. These are personality issues and can also be overcome.
Musical skill can also be taught, but it will take longer than it might for someone "gifted". As for injuries, look at people like Django Reinhardt, one of the greatest guitarists that ever lived; crippled two of his fingers on his left hand. He learned to overcome the handicap, developing a method of fretting that allowed him to not only keep playing, but truly excel and surpass his full-fingered contemporaries and beyond.
Most of what you describe as "can't overcome" comes down to giving up.

I concede that we may not reach the heights we desire, but that is not the same as being unable to achieve the general goal (musician as opposed to the best musician, for example). Truly inspirational stories of achievement come from people breaking the mold of "oh, I can't" and saying "yes I can", then doing what they have to to achieve it. Most stop at "oh, I can't" or say "yes I can" but stop shy of doing what's necessary to make it true. Hope, positivity and wishful thinking are fine, but they're useless without actually making efforts and sacrifices... It's work that really gets things done.
sudipbanerjee
I think nobody in the world live their own life. Everybody has some sorrow about their life and this is the 'life'. I think a famous line Rabindranath Tagore will be appropriate here:

Nodir epar kohe chariya niswas opare te sarbosukh amar biswas
(One side of a river thought all happiness r in the other side)
deanhills
Ankhanu wrote:
Science is a skill, as is math. Aptitude be damned, one can learn those skills and learn to apply them. Really, the limiting factor in science and math are laziness, lack of imagination and lack of curiosity. These are personality issues and can also be overcome.
Up to a point "yes". But if you want to become a GREAT scientist, then you have to have a natural aptitude for it. Perhaps you have a natural aptitude and can't recognize this as absent when those who don't have it can't do as well as you do. My brother in law and all of his children are naturals. Math comes effortlessly to them and they are brilliant at it. They're always miles ahead of others and possibly can't see it as like you they can't understand why others can't get it the same way. I liken it to Mozart's music abilities. You either have it, or you don't. Quite amazing that some of those who are really great musicians are also great mathematicians.
Ankhanu wrote:
Musical skill can also be taught, but it will take longer than it might for someone "gifted". As for injuries, look at people like Django Reinhardt, one of the greatest guitarists that ever lived; crippled two of his fingers on his left hand. He learned to overcome the handicap, developing a method of fretting that allowed him to not only keep playing, but truly excel and surpass his full-fingered contemporaries and beyond.
Most of what you describe as "can't overcome" comes down to giving up.
If you interpret what I said as the latter, then you could not have read any of my posts that well. How many stories have you heard of people who changed course when something bad happened to them, which turned out brilliant in the end. Like Charleze Theron for example who wanted to be a ballet dancer, had an injury that completely wrecked her hopes, and then in the end became a famous model and an even more famous actress. None of what happened to her was under her control. BUT, she made the best of what came her way and improvised. I'm almost certain she became a much better actress in the end than she would have been as a ballet dancer.
Robert_Redbeard
GuidanceReader wrote:
This question was posed to me today...

So are you being true to yourself and living the life you want, or are you living a life that is not what you want for what ever reason that may be (responsibilities, cash etc)...

Can you really take over that control and make a shift to overcome those obstacles that are preventing you from being who you want to be?


Good question. Hard answer.

I really do try every day to be who I am and make no reservations for the way others would prefer me to be. Which is why most people find me offensive and harsh. But I find that it keeps the good people close and the annoying people hiding in a corner.

I do not do what I would prefer to be doing. Bills require cash and that makes me keep a job that I hate. I love my work, so don't get that wrong. I just hate the fact that I have to work at making some other fool rich.

On my off time, I do what I like to do and don't really care what everyone else thinks. It is liberating to just stop caring about opinions of people that just don't matter in the long run.
Robert_Redbeard
deanhills wrote:
Ankhanu wrote:
Science is a skill, as is math. Aptitude be damned, one can learn those skills and learn to apply them. Really, the limiting factor in science and math are laziness, lack of imagination and lack of curiosity. These are personality issues and can also be overcome.
Up to a point "yes". But if you want to become a GREAT scientist, then you have to have a natural aptitude for it. Perhaps you have a natural aptitude and can't recognize this as absent when those who don't have it can't do as well as you do. My brother in law and all of his children are naturals. Math comes effortlessly to them and they are brilliant at it. They're always miles ahead of others and possibly can't see it as like you they can't understand why others can't get it the same way. I liken it to Mozart's music abilities. You either have it, or you don't. Quite amazing that some of those who are really great musicians are also great mathematicians.
Ankhanu wrote:
Musical skill can also be taught, but it will take longer than it might for someone "gifted". As for injuries, look at people like Django Reinhardt, one of the greatest guitarists that ever lived; crippled two of his fingers on his left hand. He learned to overcome the handicap, developing a method of fretting that allowed him to not only keep playing, but truly excel and surpass his full-fingered contemporaries and beyond.
Most of what you describe as "can't overcome" comes down to giving up.
If you interpret what I said as the latter, then you could not have read any of my posts that well. How many stories have you heard of people who changed course when something bad happened to them, which turned out brilliant in the end. Like Charleze Theron for example who wanted to be a ballet dancer, had an injury that completely wrecked her hopes, and then in the end became a famous model and an even more famous actress. None of what happened to her was under her control. BUT, she made the best of what came her way and improvised. I'm almost certain she became a much better actress in the end than she would have been as a ballet dancer.


This is a common discussion among people. Most like to believe that you can do anything you put your mind to doing. But science will put that myth to rest fast.

Those with a gift or natural aptitude for something will always out shine those that just put their mind to it. And those with the aptitude won't even break a sweat beating you at their game.

I spent some time working for a company that had done an extensive amount of research into this subject. They will not hire you no matter what if you do not have the born in aptitude for the job. Why? Because through decades of keeping track, they have proven that those with the natural skills always outperform those with the drive to learn it no matter how much time and resource you expend teaching them to be the best.

It is just the way the world works. But we feel so much better about our lack of talent in an area when we say to ourselves that I could do that if I put my mind to it.

Not saying that you shouldn't try new things. You may just find you have a talent you never knew about. But illusions should be ignored.
spinout
ohhhh, I have tried to live my life in many years now.... No .... I have not succeeded... uh uh!

In this case there is no try... As in the Yoda saying: there is no try, either you do or don't... i do not.

So who am I:

1. a Dictator
that was the easy one to write... Then you are the strong person. And I easy come in this form, but still something tells me that is toooooo easy! so I never complete the task!

2. The loving person
That is the hardest. To lower your guard position and show that you can care... But then I have the universe against me! I have tried!!!!! The universe don't let this grand wish happen and I instead cause my surrounding pure hell! PURE HELL! -> back to beeing the dictator - moment 22 Laughing

Conclusion: I am Satan in person either way I go, but not willingly and not fully. The unfully Satan! but for Satan to be unfully that seems to match!!! Laughing
BigGeek
How funny! Living the life I want. Sure, I love what I do, and I really love the people I work with. I'm a wireless network engineer, and I design and sell wireless networks and equipment. Good work that contributes to society and the US infrastructure, along with fun and challenging. I am who I am, a straight forward brutally honest person with an excessive work habit. I may offend my customers, when I tell them what to do to get their networks working, but I'm usually right, and putting them in the right direction sometimes takes a little offending of their egos. All and all I'm good to go with who I am and what I do.

But as far as living my life for me, that isn't really so, my money is not mine, all it does is go to pay the bills and keep me operating and go to work, so I can earn the pay check and pay the bills. I am pretty much a slave to my debt. So no, in the financial sense, I'm not living my life for me!

But you need to weigh the good and bad aspects, the job is good, friends are good, I get to be me and get the job done.....so if money is a pain in the butt, then I just deal with it.....good with the bad kind of thing!!
Ankhanu
Robert_Redbeard wrote:
This is a common discussion among people. Most like to believe that you can do anything you put your mind to doing. But science will put that myth to rest fast.

Those with a gift or natural aptitude for something will always out shine those that just put their mind to it. And those with the aptitude won't even break a sweat beating you at their game.

I spent some time working for a company that had done an extensive amount of research into this subject. They will not hire you no matter what if you do not have the born in aptitude for the job. Why? Because through decades of keeping track, they have proven that those with the natural skills always outperform those with the drive to learn it no matter how much time and resource you expend teaching them to be the best.

It is just the way the world works. But we feel so much better about our lack of talent in an area when we say to ourselves that I could do that if I put my mind to it.

Not saying that you shouldn't try new things. You may just find you have a talent you never knew about. But illusions should be ignored.

You can't do anything you want, but you CAN do most things. I don't really think it's a feel good sort of thought to think that you could do something if you put your mind to it... If anything, it's a little depressing to think of how few of us have the character to see things through; that's hardly inspirational Razz

You're right, someone who has to work to get what they want might not excel the way, or degree, a natural can (though often naturals are kinda lazy, relying on what they can do without effort, rather than really applying... In which case hard work often shines)... But that's not the same as saying they're incapable. Your employer is a specific example, but they're not an universal case; there are many who will give people a chance to prove themselves (I'm also curious how they determine an innate talent versus a learned one...)


There has also seemed to be a confusion between fame and capability in this thread... I'm just gonna go ahead and toss it out there that they're not the same thing. I'll also reiterate that I haven't been referring to desires to be the best something, but rather of being that something in a capable manner.
ratanegra
I am not living the life I want, but the life society wants me to have. I study, get bored, don't go out too much. I'd really like to change; I just don't know how to start. Maybe I'm afraid of what people would say... to be rejected or mistreated.
ocalhoun
ratanegra wrote:
Maybe I'm afraid of what people would say... to be rejected or mistreated.

Better to live the life you want and get rejected and mistreated by others, than to live the life they want for you, and be rejected and mistreated by yourself.
deanhills
ocalhoun wrote:
ratanegra wrote:
Maybe I'm afraid of what people would say... to be rejected or mistreated.

Better to live the life you want and get rejected and mistreated by others, than to live the life they want for you, and be rejected and mistreated by yourself.
WOW! This is right on. I guess that's an Ocalhoun original quote? Cool
ocalhoun
deanhills wrote:
I guess that's an Ocalhoun original quote? Cool


Of course!
coolclay
It all boils down to the nature vs. nurture concept. I am of the persuasion that while many abilities can be stronger than others depending on our predisposition, what and who we are to become is 85% (figuratively) based on our life occurrences, and what takes place during our developmental periods.

Regardless it's a great question, and unless you've just made poor decisions in life I feel like there are very few excuses for answering in the no category. If your not good at something it would follow logically to me that you probably wouldn't want to do it.

I am not very good at paperwork, hence I would not strive to be a deskjocky.
ocalhoun
coolclay wrote:
If your not good at something it would follow logically to me that you probably wouldn't want to do it.

I'd like to make artworks, but I'm not good at it. (By my own estimation.)
deanhills
ocalhoun wrote:
coolclay wrote:
If your not good at something it would follow logically to me that you probably wouldn't want to do it.

I'd like to make artworks, but I'm not good at it. (By my own estimation.)
I'd say with the little knowledge I have from your posts, you'd just about excel at anything you put your mind to. I've just picked up somewhere where you had made an effort to learn Russian, and sort of figured out how it worked within the first session. Then there are the tests you figured out instinctively and learned to perfect at passing. Like you have a double dose of persistence and drive somewhere that give you a little edge over mastering whatever you're interested in.

Art is patience and LOTS of practice. I saw my mother becoming an artist just by doing the same thing over and over again until from somewhere her art started talking. Some people seem to be able to tap into the art in them quite effortlessly. Maybe they're less inhibited than others who think first before they do the art. My mom was in the middle between the two. Went from picture perfect to expressive art over a period of intense practice of about two years. Not many of her paintings were expressive though. Just now and then she hit the right note, maybe that's sort of symbolic of all of us, even the greatest of painters.
chasbeen
We are controlled by some misconceptions that were given to us as kiddies
Because they were buried deep we don't appreciate this perhaps.
I know some people who are so brainwashed that all they talk about is retiring and wishing the week away. These people even read the emails about people who used to work there and have passed on.
These people will never escape the Matrix and lead full lives.
I'm handing my notice in soon and feel liberated that I can do this.
I am also just a few weeks off being responsible no more for my 2 kids,
There is very little that controls me but I am even now preparing to overcome these imagined fears.
READ THE ABOVE...
IT IS REAL...
deanhills
I think this sense of "liberation" is really a figment of our own imagination. The only way we could really set ourselves "free" is to live right in the moment. Not think of tomorrow or yesterday or the specific geographic location that we are in, or whether we are happy or not. I always find the moment I start wondering about my happiness or my freedom it sort of becomes a mirage of sorts. Am I living that sage advice? NO!!!! But I at least know that the key to real freedom is being able to live right in the moment without any expectations of being free, or being less shackled, or more wealthy, or more happy, or in love, or whatever. Could be why laughter is such good medicine, as I'm almost certain laughter connects us uniquely with our present moments in a wonderful way of acceptance.
bukaida
There is a difference between skill and talent. The skill can be acquired but the talent is gifted.
Blaster
Honestly I'm living my life and i'm living it how I want to. Granted there are things that I would love to never have to do yet sadly this still is life.
nepalstar
I like to live my own Life because till now nobody lived my life and I don't wanna live other life...! Why should I live others life, I want to live my own life which was not lived by others...!
deanhills
bukaida wrote:
There is a difference between skill and talent. The skill can be acquired but the talent is gifted.
Great way of putting it Bukaidi, thanks! Sort of a reminder that not all of us are the same, and that some of us have abilities that are different from others' abilities.
TheGremlyn
I can say that when I went from public school to high school I had one heck of a talent for music. I would pick up an instrument and I would practice for a day and come back and often sound better than those that had played for the entire year. I wanted to be good at it because I loved it so much, that's maybe why I was so good at it and it made me happy. Those that I had out shined were not as enthusiastic about music, it was a school credit and you just had to play 'well enough' to pass.

However, my dream of going to University for music was squashed when my parental overlords said 'No, you won't go there! It's too expensive and you won't make anything of yourself playing music'. So what was I to do? I couldn't go on to play music beyond high school unless I joined a local band. If I wanted to go to University for music so badly I suppose I could have taken control, left my family and all I knew to... live on the streets and scrape by? I'd certainly be the black sheep and my dad would never let me live that down, nor would he let me come back home if I abandoned the family.

So I would say I had no control there. My parents had control over what I did, they had some influence on where my life would go. So I played in all the bands and joined a few smaller groups and enjoyed music until I graduated high school. When I went to college for Business, an acceptable course my parents agreed on, I tried playing with a local concert band... But I found the practice times and the location were adding stress to my already stressed out life of family and home work and early mornings!

So I have missed playing in a band for almost 5 years now. I still try and play but music is not as prominent in my life. It kills me a little because I love it so much. I love playing and I wouldn't mind conducting either. I just want to surround myself with a group of people and play... But here I am... On Frihost, trying to become better at designing a web site and learning other languages to program in... Quite different...

I think, taking control and steering my life back towards music would throw me further into debt and the money stress would hurt me too much and those I care for. I haven't the time to try and make something of myself in terms of music... I have responsibilities and bills and animals to care for and supper to cook and jobs to find and loans to pay back...

If the world did not revolve around money I expect more people would be doing what they wanted. But my future was shifted because my family couldn't afford that kind of education, not to mention the additional lessons for learning piano and such...

I shake my fist at money and any kind of currency...
deanhills
TheGremlyn wrote:
I can say that when I went from public school to high school I had one heck of a talent for music. I would pick up an instrument and I would practice for a day and come back and often sound better than those that had played for the entire year. I wanted to be good at it because I loved it so much, that's maybe why I was so good at it and it made me happy. Those that I had out shined were not as enthusiastic about music, it was a school credit and you just had to play 'well enough' to pass.

However, my dream of going to University for music was squashed when my parental overlords said 'No, you won't go there! It's too expensive and you won't make anything of yourself playing music'. So what was I to do? I couldn't go on to play music beyond high school unless I joined a local band. If I wanted to go to University for music so badly I suppose I could have taken control, left my family and all I knew to... live on the streets and scrape by? I'd certainly be the black sheep and my dad would never let me live that down, nor would he let me come back home if I abandoned the family.

So I would say I had no control there. My parents had control over what I did, they had some influence on where my life would go. So I played in all the bands and joined a few smaller groups and enjoyed music until I graduated high school. When I went to college for Business, an acceptable course my parents agreed on, I tried playing with a local concert band... But I found the practice times and the location were adding stress to my already stressed out life of family and home work and early mornings!

So I have missed playing in a band for almost 5 years now. I still try and play but music is not as prominent in my life. It kills me a little because I love it so much. I love playing and I wouldn't mind conducting either. I just want to surround myself with a group of people and play... But here I am... On Frihost, trying to become better at designing a web site and learning other languages to program in... Quite different...

I think, taking control and steering my life back towards music would throw me further into debt and the money stress would hurt me too much and those I care for. I haven't the time to try and make something of myself in terms of music... I have responsibilities and bills and animals to care for and supper to cook and jobs to find and loans to pay back...

If the world did not revolve around money I expect more people would be doing what they wanted. But my future was shifted because my family couldn't afford that kind of education, not to mention the additional lessons for learning piano and such...

I shake my fist at money and any kind of currency...
I think being blessed with a talent like yours it's a real shame you can't find an outlet for it. I picked up on an artist like you at a different Forum. This guy must have had some basic lessons on music theory, has a cheap key board and then uses free software to write his music and upload it to the Web. He shared quite a bit with us. So what I'm trying to say is that maybe with Websites you can find your way to music in a very unique way. Keyboard, ear phones, software and with lots of practice it can be doable. Here are some of the songs he composed. I'm not posting them for the songs, but more for the technology that he was using and the way he found to express his art with using Internet tools and free software.
http://bronyville.org/viewtopic.php?f=26&t=2400&hilit=my+songs
spinout
Hm, I must be living the life of S*tan...Just making endless pain all the time.
Bluedoll
I think anyone who really wants to can get a makeover. I think we can not change who we are but we can reinvent ourselves. Still it is a very good question for always there are limitations. We really need to know what they really are. If we look for example of people that have not let life hold them back but became the person they wanted to be it really gives us inspiration.

I can not help look at the title of the topic and wonder about it and think about with much dissatisfaction, that very old saying, “if you do not run you life someone else will”.

thanks for sharing Idea
c'tair
ocalhoun wrote:
ratanegra wrote:
Maybe I'm afraid of what people would say... to be rejected or mistreated.

Better to live the life you want and get rejected and mistreated by others, than to live the life they want for you, and be rejected and mistreated by yourself.


This is an awesome quote.

As for myself - I'm trying to live the way I want. This sometimes puts me in conflict with a certain group of people - the kind of people who know what's best for you, even though they ain't in my shoes. Worst thing is, when I refuse to grant their request, they get all pouty.
This is also where true friends shine - true friends will support you and be there for you when you take a hit or when you accomplish something. False friends will always be there to ask for your help, but when you're in trouble - they'll quietly disappear.
Back on topic - I think knowing what to do in life is the most important thing in your life. The next most important thing is doing it. I've met too many people that are either all words or all looks, but I've only met a handful that just do.
HVLGruppen
deanhills wrote:
Deep question, particularly for people who are posting with pseudonyms! Smile

I really don't know what "true to oneself" means. I think we rarely have the luxury to define ourselves. Mostly the people around us get to do that for us. Particularly when we are kids. We may think we are in control, and we may have grand ideas about who we are and where we are going to end up one day. But there will always be other people who are pulling our strings. The only part that may be uniquely our own is how we respond to that as part of a community of people. And what one makes of it.


This. This is a good response!
johans
deep question...

Reading the feedback of this topic got really different opinion based on person and in relation with country liven..
briankid
i think sometimes i live my own life, sometimes i live a life im forced to live
deanhills
briankid wrote:
i think sometimes i live my own life, sometimes i live a life im forced to live
I think all of us must have that feeling sometimes. Like sometimes it would be really great if one could hit an escape key of a kind! Smile
Gitesh
I planned for a life of a wanderer, photographer always with the nature living the wildlife but i am stuck with my dental clinic 24*7 and even though i am earning good enough its not giving me satisfaction which i derived from being a wild person closed to nature. but i plan to pack my bags and live my dream someday., but till then cash compulsions are my enemies.
deanhills
Maybe one day you could combine your dentistry with the outdoors and photography. There must be places that need someone who is prepared to rough it. You probably still have to find those places.
ocalhoun
Gitesh wrote:
I planned for a life of a wanderer, photographer always with the nature living the wildlife but i am stuck with my dental clinic 24*7 and even though i am earning good enough its not giving me satisfaction which i derived from being a wild person closed to nature. but i plan to pack my bags and live my dream someday., but till then cash compulsions are my enemies.

Cash compulsions are always the enemy of living the life you really want to.

Break out of the consumerism-centered social mold: that's the only way out. You have to break yourself of wanting a fancy TV or a shiny car... Then you can realize you don't need all that much money anyway, and Then you can do what you want, even if it doesn't give you much money.
busman
This topic is very pertanent to my life right now suprisingly hahaha. I just recently broke up with the last female I am 99.999% sure I will ever date. I love her and shes loves me but it just wasn't working and so we had to call it quits, anyway; I learned this past weekend I'm finally ok with being myself. I'm a gay man and I can be ok with that for the first time in my life EVER... Anyone who tells you it's a choice or it wasn't hard is either from a super tolerant place and or a super religious place (respectively)
and for most of us, we learn to completely disenvow any part of your life that makes you different. I think for the first time ever, I finally feel able to be myself for me, and ****** what anyone else says. This was EASILY the hardest thing I've ever had to realise for myself... That I'm not bi and i dont have the chance at a "normal" life and that I'm alright with that. For you straight people out there you have NO idea how hard this is but if you have a gay friend PLEASE support them because it's very likely that they hate themselves and want to themselves to change more than anyone else out there and your kind words and support can finally let them live THIER life and help in them being finally happy.
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