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Will she like these poems I wrote for her?





sandeky5
I wrote this for a girl I really like. I'm only 18, and she is 17, but we are and have been really close for a long time. This is my second poem to her. What do you think she will think of it? I don't care much about real poetry, but I love writing love poems even if it doesn't follow poetry rules (if there are any). Please give me some advice if you have any as well. I mainly want to know what you guys think. Thank you sooooo much =) And my name is Kyle =) Thanks.


In the beginning, she made my heart race.
Knowing there was a presence of God’s grace.
Became friends for a couple of years,
Took some time to lose my fears.

Here is what I have to say.

When you cry, you make me cry.
When you’re silent, I wonder why.
When you think, you stare into space.
When you laugh, you cheer the place.
When you walk with me, I stand guard.
When you talk, I listen hard.

Her voice, beautiful as a singing bird,
Her smile, can’t be explained in a single word.
Her hair, cascading like a waterfall,
Her eyes? I’m lost…

I hope and pray hard every day,
That she will never go away.
I hope and pray hard every day,
She’ll always have the strength to stay.

I hope and pray I make your day.





2nd poem

The moment you walked into my life,
We knew there’d be a connection
The moment I saw your beautiful eyes.
My eyes saw no imperfection.
“What would it be like if we could bind?”
Was the first thought on my mind.

The moment I saw your smile,
What’s on the mind was unsaid.
The moment I knew ‘twas worthwhile,
You then first saw my face turn red.
“What will it be like when away?”
This is when I think and pray.

“God, please help me all the way,
Please give her patience to stay.
It’s faith that tends to weigh,
Oh, Lord, I also pray.

Don’t let her let me go,
In her mind may I aglow.
Never let her feel so low
Lord I pray that she will always know.

‘What I see in her is so great,
She is too good to have a rate.’
O’ Lord ye shall determine our fate,
Let me have faith that she will wait.”

It isn’t known if you will be my future star,
Just know, I’ll always love you for who you are.
LegendVPN
Hi! I haven't read the whole 2 poems but as long as you mean every word and they are all from the heart, she will like it especially because you mentioned that it was God Who gave her to you. Smile
menino
I think she will love it.

I like it a lot.

If she doesn't like it, then its her loss, but I think its great really. Not all people, and women also like poetry, but its a really nice way to express what you feel for her, and nicely done, might I add.
Good luck and all the best for you'll both. :d
boinsterman
It's way too mushy for me, but girls tend to like that sort of thing. But I also understand girls like the sort of subtlety that is more typical of "normal" poetry, although I heard this in the context of a discussion about humor. Throw in a few surprises. Don't be too predictable--that could weird her out.
Radar
I realise in all odds we're not going to find out, but seeing this thread sitting here for months, you start to wonder where or not she did actually like them.

Oh well.
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