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Suicide Help,





codersfriend
My friend want to suicide because of the problems in her life. What advice can I give to her.. She always attempts to slash her wrist. (I don't know where to post this so I thought this is a good place to put this topic)
shivaghimire
I heard such many cases. I heard many suicide cases this week. The main problem is personal stress gained from competition, family problem, relationship and many others. First, we have to find whats the problem is and try to solve and all should help her. Sometimes what happens is; she is trying to say the problem but no one listens. So we should try to listen her problem.
After having life; doing struggle, being a capable is brave behavior but thinking to die is the most brave decision taken. Those who think of dying is really brave but such a brave person can live proudly so live and so the bravery. Dying ends the bravery at once but living and struggling is showing bravery again and again. So inspire her to live and struggle for the problem. 75% of the problem even can't touch us. 17% will be solved easily. 5% problems we can solve with little effort and remaining 3% effects us but brave person will solve it. So tell her not to die.
Nintendo
Tell her that she's special and why she's special.

Tell her how many people would miss her if she were to leave.

Tell her that she has friends who are willing to be there for her.

Noone should be driven to the point of suicide; it's too sad and upsetting.

Tell her to come to Frihost and we can try to help!
loremar
You have to talk more about her problems. Try to ask what's new about her problem. Sometimes suicidal people don't open up easily. You have to gain her trust. Let her know that her problem is also your problem. Some people usually invites the person to have some fun and forget about it but I think it actually makes it worse. She's always been thinking about her problem and seeing people around her having fun would just make her feel more of the magnitude of her problem and if she feel isolated, she'd think suicide is the only option. In short, she wants everyone to understand what she feels. Never say that it's just nothing. You have to acknowledge what she feels.

But comforting her frequently is just a temporary treatment. It may delay her attempt to commit suicide. The best solution is to convince her to see a doctor. I'm not sure if a friend can do that but a family member should, someone she really cares about or someone she know would care for her unconditionally. It is important that she understands that her suicide is your problem and you want to prevent that. People who have many attempts want somebody to help them and stop them from committing suicide. I think it's a fixation of her trying to reach out for help, it's like "you people help me or I'll die?". And tell her the reason why she should seek for professional help is your attempt or you're looking for solution for her not to commit suicide. Tell her you don't want her to die.

But the people who can really save her is her families or the person who she's closest too. It's important that they should attend to her every minute. She shouldn't be left alone. Or as much as possible they should sleep beside her to make sure she doesn't run off and make herself be alone. But the most important thing is to get a doctor or a professional to help and give her medications. It really helps. I know this from experience.

Nintendo wrote:
Tell her to come to Frihost and we can try to help!

Yes. That also helps. There's a lot of people here who knows how to solve any sorts of problems.
codersfriend
Thanks guys, do you think I would need to seek a counselor?
or a psychologist to convince her not to go into that?
codersfriend
loremar wrote:


The best solution is to convince her to see a doctor. I'm not sure if a friend can do that but a family member should, someone she really cares about or someone she know would care for her unconditionally. ...


Nintendo wrote:
Tell her to come to Frihost and we can try to help!

Yes. That also helps. There's a lot of people here who knows how to solve any sorts of problems.


Thanks, yeah she has a broken family .. I'm also thinking on how to convince her to see the doctor without her thinking that she's ill

here in the Philippines, most people are shy to see the psychotherapist
friho
wow,it's a secious thing. you would be feel tired because have this friend. in my opinion, you can make him feel relax and say it's important. you must treasure your life.your life is not only belong to you but also your familys ,you should consider your mother and father ,if you have any question ,they would be sad. you are their favirote child.
like this,try to let him give up suicide.
BigGeek
I had a friend that was miserable and disgusted with life. Her broken home, marriage, abusive relationships all led her to the feeling that life is hopeless, and that it would just be easier if she ended it all. She shared her feelings with me, and during the course of he conversation asked my how I felt about life, and the hardships I have endured, and why I continued to stay alive.

I gave her a once over of my basic attitude in and about life.

First off we are all going to die at one point or another, it is inevitable! With that said, why force the inevitable.

I also have a spiritual view that is rather scientifically based, which is that there are obviously two forces in life. One of life, that imparts life, and one of death, life dies. Giving into to death, is a denial of life, life is everywhere, and flourishes on planet earth, and brutal as this place may be, and as heartbreaking as it is, giving up on life is not an option, it manifests everywhere, through birth, and growth, look at nature, all the different species, of plants, insects, and animals. It is amazing, and each day can offer a glimpse into that life that is amazing. To deny that and invite death is giving up, letting go, which can be good, but each of us in our own way can accomplish the same thing while still alive.

The choice is yours, each of us must in our own way chose life, or death. My choice is life....what be yours? Shocked

She called me a few weeks later and said she was going to fight off her depression and stay alive Very Happy
sudipbanerjee
Take her to a good Psychiatrist
menino
Yes, a lot of people with family problems want to commit suicide.

My friend also was saying many times that he wanted to commit suicide, because he had nothing to live for.
My other friend then told him that we were his friends, and he has his children still.
Also he compared his life to those poor people in Africa and India, who live on less than a dollar a day, and do not know when their next meal will come, and despite this, they still try to live on as much as possible.
Its not just the poverty that they have to deal with, but also the militia who use their poverty as a political tool, so its much worse.
It is not easy, but if she can give some service of her time for the well being of others, maybe she will have some meaning in her life to stay alive.
codersfriend
thanks .. I would take your advices. Very nice explanation @BigGeek and I would try also your illustration @menino on the poverty stuff in africa.. my friend's problem is financially related.. but she still could eat,, it's maybe she just wants to buys the things she wanted... but I'll use those advice to help encourage her to live Smile
airh3ad
Quote:
Once you recognize these signs and symptoms in someone, you can help save their life by taking action and getting them to the nearest ER. In most cases, there are many factors involved in a combination that leads someone to take their own life. Here are some of the potential reasons and As you can see, it isn’t just people with mental illness who commit suicide. But having a mental illness, a previous suicide attempt, or a family history of mental illness can increase the above risk factors. Also increasing someone’s risk may be chronic pain, chronic illness, a family history of suicides, and physical or sexual abuse as a child.


Source: http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2010/07/31/help-prevent-suicide/

Edited by Helios because user posted without quoting the source
BigGeek
codersfriend wrote:
thanks .. I would take your advices. Very nice explanation @BigGeek and I would try also your illustration @menino on the poverty stuff in africa.. my friend's problem is financially related.. but she still could eat,, it's maybe she just wants to buys the things she wanted... but I'll use those advice to help encourage her to live Smile


Money is not the end all to happiness, some of the happiest times of my life are doing things in places with friends that required no money. Sure struggling for money is a bummer, and gets old after years of the same old strife, but that is not all there is to living. How many people have you met that have very little and seem happy to be alive?

I've met extremely wealthy people that seem to have everything they could ever want, and they are miserable! Do what you need to do to improve yourself and better your income, SURE, but killing yourself when it doesn't workout is a odd way of handling the loss.

Learn from your mistakes and work to improve upon them that's all anyone can do!!
bruk
Suicide is a sin. Twisted Evil
airh3ad
Yes i forgot to put a quote on my post. Anyway you are right once you suicide its a sin.
softwarefreak
Say that you love her............

And if you are really bothered bout that person, you must be in love! Idea
danakajoel
Time and support. That's all you can give. Often it's a cry for help and they don't mean it but you can't take the chance!!!
watersoul
codersfriend wrote:
My friend want to suicide because of the problems in her life. What advice can I give to her.. She always attempts to slash her wrist. (I don't know where to post this so I thought this is a good place to put this topic)

Sounds like attention seeking/cry for help/needing emotional support if you ask me.
"attempts to slash her wrist" ??
What? Is her knife blunt? Has she got leather skin? ...or did she perhaps just do it somewhere she knew she'd be found, and saved from bleeding to death?

I won't belittle whatever troubles she's going through but serious at killing herself? Nah, she'd do it if she really wanted to.

Many years ago as a young teenager I took 300 paracetamols (purchased from several stores to avoid suspicion) washed down with a litre bottle of whisky. I had my 'goodbye' note in my pocket and I'd walked 3 hours up the mountains just so I'd not be be found, or able to do anything about it if I changed my mind. I lost the ability to walk after maybe 20 minutes, everything became hazy, and then I desperately wanted to live but couldn't do anything about it except lay on the ground and slowly pass out, waiting to die. 10 hours or so later I woke up glad to be alive, but really poorly for about a week, making excuses that I 'must have eaten something bad'.

I may seem cold and harsh here, but in my opinion, anyone who makes a big show of their wish to die, probably doesn't really want to. It's the folk who aren't communicating these feelings who are the ones you have to worry about more.

Tell her you love her. Tell her whatever problems she's got can be fixed, with help. Point her in the direction of the help and hold her hand through it...or walk away from her situation if you cannot commit to her long term.

I don't envy your position, but I hope whatever happens, your friend finds some coping strategy for her issues in life. Just don't allow her suicide 'threats' to control your life.
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