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First boy I ever had a crush on sent a friend request





furtasacra
Oh boy oh boy am I ever conflicted about this one.

First off, I'm 42 years old. I never ever thought to hear from the guy twenty years later. This is just weird. Why did he remember me, after all this time, and hunt me down on the internet tubes?

Is it because I let him copy my homework?

I guess it doesn't matter, because he's no longer the tall, thin boy I fell in love with all those years ago, but his big blue eyes are still just as intelligent and piercing.

Thoughts? Suggestions?
blackheart
facebook? haha


In my opinion, this is one of the few situations where meeting someone off the internet is wholy justified. I mean, you know they're a real person... and it's not really meeting, it's re-meeting, no?

Leave a few flattering comments on a few photos, make small talk in comments for a few weeks, think of something you can make an excuse to invite him to?

See if he's become attractive in a more adult way?




Wink



EDIT: although perhaps before getting carried away check out whether he's gone and added the rest of the class.
tingkagol
Probably added you on a whim. Facebook & other networking sites do have "friend recommendation" features. But I guess it's harmless to find out his real deal.
lagoon
I'm sorry, but I wouldn't get too excited. He probably added you on a whim. I do it, we do it, the internet does it.
apple
furtasacra wrote:
Oh boy oh boy am I ever conflicted about this one.

First off, I'm 42 years old. I never ever thought to hear from the guy twenty years later. This is just weird. Why did he remember me, after all this time, and hunt me down on the internet tubes?

Is it because I let him copy my homework?

I guess it doesn't matter, because he's no longer the tall, thin boy I fell in love with all those years ago, but his big blue eyes are still just as intelligent and piercing.

Thoughts? Suggestions?


I can understand. Recently I met my ex after 13 1/2 years and it was a very odd experience.
At first I felt those familiar butterflies in the stomach and was like a giggling 16 year old girl again. After spending a day hanging out with him tho, I realized that I felt nothing for him, not in a personal 'I want to be with you' kinda way. My husband was also very VERY understanding of our meeting and me wanting/needing to spend time with my ex.

I think if he added you, you got nothing to lose. I'd say add him and chat a bit. Only 2 things can happen really...
1...you all become good friends
2...you talk for a bit and part ways.

The up side to this is, if you think he turned into a weirdo and wish to not interact with him, you can remove him Razz
azoundria
Is he still single?
iyepes
Are you still single?

If you both are, so go ahead and let know each other. After all those years both of you are totally diferent people, you'll have to know him again and so does he.

A men who liked from University found me recently through common friends. Even I avoided him all those years, I accepted knowing him. As a result we are good friends now, and he found out I'm not the kind of woman he wants, which is a relief to me by the way, he, he, he.
mattyj
like others have said, check to see if he added your whole class, he may have just searched the whole school and added everyone he could remember
deanhills
At least it must be good for your ego to think he still remembers you after all this time. If you are not involved with anyone else, I would explore it and see where it goes. Always great to have friends, and one who remembers you from childhood times must be great to know.
driftingfe3s
If you both are single, you should try talking to him! I believe I've wasted many chances with other people because I didn't try. Because of that I've decided to always try even though it doesn't seem like anything will happen. He may be a totally different person from when you were kids, for better or worse, but you won't know until you try!
Parkour_Jarrod
Sometimes those childhood crushes are ment to be your true love, so you never know it could just be it

I say

Go for it, and see if anything happens, ask about his life, how things have been etc etc, and then somehow talk about school and how you had a crush on him, see what he says
lagoon
Hell, why not?
icesuga
hahaha! that is so lovely from him... well unless u got a partner already, id love to hear from my love once again Crying or Very sad


u be lucky Very Happy
mk12327
Unfortunately, i would agree with most of the posts that says that he probably added you on the whim. I do that mysel sometimes. Social networking sites "help" you get connected and re-connected with old friends and acquintances easily, sometimes to the extend you added people just for the sake of doing it.

However, if we look on the bright side, the two of you might become good friends or lovers (who knows the future!) after being away from each other for such a long time. Especially if both are single, it doesn't hurt to get to know someone you once knew all over again.
gandalfthegrey
If you are single, that would be wonderful news!

If you are coupled, you really don't care one way or the other.
zbale
"Furtasacra", here's some food for thought (I've been there):

In the same way as "beauty is in the eyes of the beholder", we are attracted to people because we perceive them as attractive (different people will find different people attractive).

Now the thing is this: when it comes to our early crushes and we see/meet them again, it's not just a matter of coming with an idea of what an attractive person is, and comparing them to that idea, and concluding that we find them attractive (or possibly not anymore, or not in the same way). In such a case, these very people were instrumental in our "sentimental education", that is in the definition of who we find attractive or not. In some cases our definition evolved later on, but not always and probably never entirely.

The result is this: it is not unusual to still "feel something" for our early crushes, and the strength of such an attraction can be explained by the fact that it is (to a large or limited extent, depending on the situation) "tautological": in the most extreme cases, there is no way we cannot find this person attractive, because they were the ones who gave us the taste and measure of what is attractive (to the point that we might have, to a large or limited extent, "looked for them" in the other people we met).

On the other hand, the person always has changed, which can hurt us in a major way if it means that our (usually idealized) "yardstick" now looks broken, or simply so different. It is part of our world, and ourselves, shattering to pieces. It can be painful, and it certainly is an unsettling experience.

If you are free to do so, knowing the person better can be a good way to decide whether the person is still worthy of feelings, though obviously in a different way, or if that person is now less interesting than you thought and that you should move on in a different direction.
rshanthakumar
True love does not die! It lingers in your heart.

You might have parted ways but your thoughts do come back to that person once in a while. That is what I would call as true love. However, you might not have the same chemistry that you had when you first met him or her. But still you might find that this person is one of the few people who know you best.

Check him out! You will not grudge it. You miss him. You might grudge later.
Greatking
get together and have fun. get to know eachother all over again. see whats up in his life. for all u know he may be married. so have lunch its harmless, find out if u feel something. lifes good girl enjoy!
jabce85
GO FOR IT!
apple
well? are you gonna tell us what's happened? Razz
joostvane
Greatking wrote:
get together and have fun. get to know eachother all over again. see whats up in his life. for all u know he may be married. so have lunch its harmless, find out if u feel something. lifes good girl enjoy!


Agreed. On facebook, some really good friends from primary school added me lately. It has only been 5 years, but getting in touch with them again is awesome. All the new cool stuff you have experienced and everything, they also did! Its great to share new experiences and meet them again now that you are more mature & all. I'd say go for it! What can it do harm?
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