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How to get a shy guy to ask you out?





kuranka
Hi, I have this slight crush on a somewhat shy guy. I am torn between asking him out and waiting for him to ask me. At the same time I don't want to fall in the trap of being the sole engine of the relationship. In my past, I was usually bored with this attitudes and the relationships did not survive. Help;) !
Arnie
http://www.wikihow.com/Show-a-Very-Shy-Guy-You-Like-Him
http://www.wikihow.com/Get-a-Shy-Guy-to-Notice-You-at-School
etc.
deanhills
kuranka wrote:
Hi, I have this slight crush on a somewhat shy guy. I am torn between asking him out and waiting for him to ask me. At the same time I don't want to fall in the trap of being the sole engine of the relationship. In my past, I was usually bored with this attitudes and the relationships did not survive. Help;) !


Perhaps good to just keep it very casual. Like chatting to him. If you have a sport you share, maybe you can ask him for a game of tennis, badminton, etc. Sort of spontaneously though. Shy guys may scare easily. So good to focus on friendship first until a relationship of trust has been built, and he is relaxed in your company. He may then suprise you with his own initiaves.
Da Rossa
Ask him out instead. Don't worry. But you don't need to go directly either. Get him nearby and have a conversation, he can let it flow from there, once the channel is stabilished. Fantastic things can happen from that point on.
Dean_The_Great
Where is it that you know this guy? School? Work?

The way I look at it, if you want to go out with the guy, but you don't want to be the forward one to ask, keep having conversations with the guy, find mutual interests, and then it will just seem natural that you go out together. If you make him feel comfortable enough, he will probably ask you out. And if he doesn't, then you're just going to have to go for it!! And that's awesome because once he knows you like him too, he'll be more apt to ask you in the future for 2nd dates and such!
ssthanapati
Just ask him out... do some activity together which interests you both.
peaceupnorth
As a recovering shy guy... it helps to have a friendly relationship first... like the others said, he should be comfortable. But it depends on HOW SHY he is... some people have a really difficult time with the opposite sex. I remember I had no problems interacting with people I wasn't attracted to, but when there was some interest... wham... it was so bad, I could hardly speak... when I did it all came out horribly wrong and awkward.

So it takes these shy types a friendly, outgoing and loving person to get them confident and out of their shell. That's the best way, anybody warms up when they're loved. Or lots of alcohol... but the results of this approach are not usually very satisfying or pretty.
apple
How old are you?

Dean asked a good and most important question, where do you know him from?

Are you friends with him at all? Do you speak?
pollux1er
Just try to be more closer to him, and let things go on. By betting closer, he can have the chance to express himself and teel you if he is interested in you too. Because it is better for you to know his real position about you too. Good luck!
RubySlasher
Hold his cat as ransom.
Arnie
^ Listen to this guy.
Afaceinthematrix
Just ask him out and see where it goes! Guys loved to be asked out (well I do, at least). The worse that can happen is that you go out on a date, things don't work out, and then you just don't see each other anymore.
mk12327
Yup, it depends on how shy the guy is. Like many had said, try to first build up a normal friendship environment so that he feels comfortable talking and going out with you. Maybe the first few times you could take the lead and ask him out... if he is not as shy, most likely he'll catch the hint and slowly starts to ask you out. However, there are cases where the guy is so shy that he avoids when you try to ask him out! =/
Daeg
If a shy guy like you he can't let you know until he is absolutely sure that you like him first, there's a fear of rejection that he has to overcome, so give him confidence. laugh at his jokes, show interest in what he talks about, ask questions and keep the conversation going. If he's quiet then fill in the award silences don't wait for him to do it, also ask him out he's not going to get around to it any time soon. If your willing to recruit one of your girl friends to give him your number and let him know that you like him that works too, it's how I mat my wife Wink
ptfrances
It's sometimes difficult this kind of situation but if you know him well, you will find the solution and how to ask him that.

Wink
cavey
Maybe he is waiting for you to ask him out...
Go ahead, take the first step. Think about what you may be missing!
raggadoon
kuranka wrote:
Hi, I have this slight crush on a somewhat shy guy. I am torn between asking him out and waiting for him to ask me. At the same time I don't want to fall in the trap of being the sole engine of the relationship. In my past, I was usually bored with this attitudes and the relationships did not survive. Help;) !


First of all it is only a slight crush so you have nothing to lose if you ask him out. The second thing you need to do is know what "you" want. And finally, in the past it was you who got bored with them! If you want to know why your relationships fail in the past and will continue to in the future just go take a look in the mirror.

By the way how do you know he is shy?

http://www.frihost.com/forums/vt-103360.html
raggadoon
kuranka wrote:
Hi, I have this slight crush on a somewhat shy guy. I am torn between asking him out and waiting for him to ask me. At the same time I don't want to fall in the trap of being the sole engine of the relationship. In my past, I was usually bored with this attitudes and the relationships did not survive. Help;) !


First of all it is only a slight crush so you have nothing to lose if you ask him out. The second thing you need to do is know what "you" want. And finally, in the past it was you who got bored with them! If you want to know why your relationships fail in the past and will continue to in the future just go take a look in the mirror.

By the way how do you know he is shy?

http://www.frihost.com/forums/vt-103360.html
apple
so did you ask him? did he say yes? Smile
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